A Quote by Marly Youmans

What is a spouse for? Not to be your personal servant, certainly! — © Marly Youmans
What is a spouse for? Not to be your personal servant, certainly!
One of the things I say is, 'You cannot control your spouse, but you can influence your spouse.' And one of the ways to influence your spouse is to make sure you are meeting their need for love.
Don't cohabitate. Don't fornicate. Don't look at pornography. Don't create a standard of beauty. Have your spouse be your standard of beauty. This is one of the great devastating effects of pornography: you lust after people and compare your spouse to them. It's impossible to be satisfied in your marriage if you don't have a standard that is biblical; that standard is always your spouse.
When you're married, the person you would most like to love you is your spouse. And if you feel loved by your spouse, the world looks bright. But if the love tank is empty, and you don't feel loved by your spouse, the world begins to look dark.
You really don't have to worry about your spouse, as long as you trust him or her. If you trust your spouse or whoever you're in a relationship with, everybody else doesn't matter.
If you simply take the name of Christ upon you and call yourself His servant, yet do not obey Him, but follow your own whim, or your own hereditary prejudice, or the custom of some erroneous church-you are no servant of Christ. If you really are a servant of Christ, your first duty is to obey Him.
My personal belief is that you carry your own water in a relationship. If you see a girl and you think she's hot, that's a very human reaction, but you don't go and tell your spouse that, you know? So in one way it's how you behave.
The covenant of your servanthood is that you be a servant to God, not to someone else, and that you know that everything except God is a servant to God, as He Most High has said, "There is none in the heaven and the earth but cometh unto the Compassionate as a servant."
Whether you send an e-mail, tell your spouse in person, write a letter, talk over the phone, or write a quick note, remember that what you say today has the capacity to transform the countenance and the character of the most important person in your life, your spouse.
How you think about your spouse greatly impacts how you treat your spouse.
Husbands and wives, recognize that in marriage you have become one flesh. If you live for your private pleasure at the expense of your spouse, you are living against yourself and destroying your joy. But if you devote yourself with all your heart to the holy joy of your spouse, you will also be living for your joy and making a marriage after the image of Christ and His church.
I tell every young woman who asks me, be very careful about your choice of spouse. If you don't have a supportive spouse, it will be difficult to take on so many things.
Write a list of ways that you have benefited from being married to your spouse. Then write a list of your spouse's positive patterns and qualities. Keep adding to the lists and reread them frequently.
It's never as easy to keep your own spouse happy as it is to make someone else's spouse happy.
A leader must have a servant's heart. And if he has a servant's heart, he will act like a servant and react like a servant when he is treated like a servant.
Some would define a servant like this: 'A servant is one who finds out what his master wants him to do, and then he does it.' The human concept of a servant is that a servant goes to the master and says, 'Master, what do you want me to do?' The master tells him, and the servant goes off BY HIMSELF and does it. That is not the biblical concept of a servant of God. Being a servant of God is different from being a servant of a human master. A servant of a human master works FOR his master. God, however, works THROUGH His servants.
Put Your Spouse First: When the children are grown and move out of the home, who will be left but your spouse? Nurture that relationship first and foremost. It is your role, together, to be the best parents you can be and what better way to do that than by parenting together and teaching your children (by what you say and do) that the bond of marriage is stronger than any other earthly commitment
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