A Quote by Marty Feldman

I don't know any jokes, which is embarrassing. I wish I did.

Marty Feldman

Quote Topics

Any Did Embarrassing Jokes Know Which Wish

Quote Author

Marty Feldman
English - Comedian
July 8, 1934 - December 2, 1982

Many of our miseries are merely comparative: we are often made unhappy, not by the presence of any real evil, but by the absence of some fictitious good; of something which is not required by any real want of nature, which has not in itself any power of gratification, and which neither reason nor fancy would have prompted us to wish, did we not see it in the possession of others.

Samuel Johnson

For now, oh my God, it is to You alone that I can talk, because nobody else will understand. I cannot bring any other man on this earth into the cloud where I dwell in Your light, that is, Your darkness, where I am lost and abashed. I cannot explain to any other man the anguish which is Your joy nor the loss which is the Possession of You, nor the distance from all things which is the arrival in You, nor the death which is the birth in You because I do not know anything about it myself and all I know is that I wish it were over - I wish it were begun.

Thomas Merton

Embarrassed journalists ask me embarrassing questions, and they get embarrassing answers, and then hand out embarrassing stories to the embarrassing editors, who put them to the front pages of newspapers. When is this going to end?

Yao Ming

For we did not and do not wish the Temple to be placed in any servitude except that which is fitting.

Jacques de Molay

I've never been able to tell jokes. In the beginning of my career I did impressions and jokes like any other comedian, but I was never very successful because I did it poorly. So I started to talk to the audience and started talking about the atmosphere around me and started to become angry, not in a mean-spirited way, but in a fun way - and my attitude developed from there.

Don Rickles

I don't agree with beauty contests. I did it one time. It wasn't embarrassing being Wonder Woman; it was embarrassing walking around on stage in a bikini. It was ridiculous, stupid, and humiliating.

Lynda Carter

There aren't any embarrassing questions — just embarrassing answers.

Carl T. Rowan

I like jokes, but Ray and I, we never did jokes. We weren't in that line of humor. We each contributed our own kind of observations. I'm glad to have people look at and laugh at and respect and get some creative juice out of what we did by observing.

Bob Elliott

It's embarrassing to go through any rebellious stage in front of people that you love and respect, and yet I'm glad I did.

Drew Barrymore

A breakup is hard enough, and to have it all filmed and have to re-watch it and know that people all across the country are watching you get your heart broken, it is embarrassing. It's not fun. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Becca Kufrin

People may not have the right to know about your personal, private life or any detail about any potentially embarrassing photo, but they do have the right to know whether you are honest, candid and forthcoming.

Krystal Ball

Without appearing smug in any way, I would say I did not have a role model. I wish I had but I did not.

Ronnie Screwvala

I think reality television, unless it's inspirational, which it very rarely is, I think it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing state of affairs that we're in.

Chelsea Handler

I was a journalist. I was a drummer. I was everything. I didn't know what the heck I was. But with Jack Paar, the job was very specific - no confusion. You came in each day. You wrote five pages of jokes. You handed the pages in... The pressure was to write five pages of jokes every day. I did it, and I thought, 'This is what I like to do.'

Garry Marshall

Do you have a Wish?' he asked, referring to this organization, The Genie Foundation, which is in the business of granting sick kids one wish. 'No' I said. 'I used my Wish pre-Miracle.' 'What'd you do?' I sighed loudly. 'I was thirteen,' I said. 'Not Disney,' he said. I said nothing. 'You did not go to Disney World.' I said nothing. 'HAZEL GRACE!' he shouted. 'You did not use your one dying Wish to go to Disney World with your parents.' 'Also Epcot Center,' I mumbled. 'Oh, my God,' Augustus said. 'I can't believe I had a crush on a girl with such cliché wishes.