A Quote by Mary Gaitskill

I remember back in the '90s, I used to feel criticized by women for not having children. Like there must be something wrong with me. — © Mary Gaitskill
I remember back in the '90s, I used to feel criticized by women for not having children. Like there must be something wrong with me.
People still think that a woman who doesn't have children or doesn't want children is really lacking in something. I've seen this over and over again in my life. I've had this thinking used against me repeatedly. I remember I had a therapist once, and I brought this up, and she said, "Well, I think women who don't have children feel very self-critical. They feel bad, so they think other people are critical in that way."
Mothers who are strong people, who can pursue a life of their own when it is time to let their children go, empower their childrenof either gender to feel free and whole. But weak women, women who feel and act like victims of something or other, may make their children feel responsible for taking care of them, and they can carry their children down with them.
I must tell you that I should really like to think there's something wrong with me- Because, if there isn't, then there's something wrong with the world itself-and that's much more frightening! That would be terrible. So I'd rather believe there is something wrong with me, that could be put right.
Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold onto something or someone the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. It confuses you because you think that your feelings were wrong and it makes you feel so small because it’s so hard to keep it inside when you let it out and it doesn’t come back. You’re left so alone that you can’t explain.
I feel like there are women who are genuinely born to be mothers, and women who are born to be aunties, and women who really probably not should be allowed near children. The tragedy that happens is when any one of those women ends up in the wrong category.
I was so used to seeing so many women in the media flaunting their bodies 4 weeks after having a baby - and kudos to those who have genes that they can get right back into shape 2 weeks, 4 weeks after having a baby. But that never happened to me, and I remember going to my doctor asking why.
Like leggings, comedies created by women came into vogue in the late 1980s, exploded in the early '90s, went mainstream in the mid-'90s, and were shoved into the back of the closet around 1997.
There's reality shows and things like that and I think 'Parenthood's kind of a throwback to what we used to have back in the '70s, '80s and '90s. People want to see this again, and I feel like it's just a solid, good show.
There's reality shows and things like that and I think 'Parenthood''s kind of a throwback to what we used to have back in the '70s, '80s and '90s. People want to see this again, and I feel like it's just a solid, good show.
When I look back at old footage of me back in the early '90s, it almost looks like a cartoon character, or something.
It's not nuclear physics. You always remember that. But if you write about sports long enough, you're constantly coming back to the point that something buoys people; something makes you feel better for having been there. Something of value is at work there...Something is hallowed here. I think that something is excellence.
There is such a problem with racism, so to actually just say it and have so many people of colour message me and thank me for saying something... I remember when I used to cry about it to my manager I used to be like: 'Why do I feel like this?' and she'd never say it, and I'd never say it. It was really strange.
I find that women want to tell me about their birthing experiences. In the most excruciating detail. It's not put me off having children, but I do feel like I know too much.
Remember with your heart. Go back, go back and go back. The skies of this world were always meant to have dragons. When they are not here, humans miss them. Some never think of them, of course. But some children, from the time they are small, they look up at the blue summer sky and watch for something that never comes. Because they know. Something that was supposed to be there faded and vanished. Something that we must bring back, you and I.
You look back at a time you idealize now and you only remember the good stuff. You tell the stories about the hard stuff and just laugh about it now. You don't remember how difficult it was to be stranded in Austin after driving 52 hours from Seattle in a rainstorm and having nowhere to stay for five hours. You remember that stuff and laugh about it now. You don't feel it the way you did back then when you were so scared and nervous and tired and hungry. We always idealize the past because we don't feel the painful stuff the way we used to.
I was a lonely, frightened little fat kid who felt there was something deeply wrong with me because I didn't feel like I was the gender I'd been assigned. I felt there was something wrong with me, something sick and twisted inside me, something very very bad about me. And everything I read backed that up.
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