Unfortunately, everyone thought that Teri Hatcher was my wife. Matter of fact, I would be with my wife, holding my wife's hand at a football game, and someone would come up to me and say, 'Hey, I love those commercials you do with your wife.' My kids almost had shirts made up that said, 'Teri Hatcher is not my mom.'
Last week I told my wife, If you would learn to cook, I could fire the chef. She said, If you could learn to make love, I could fire the chauffer.
I always wondered if you clone your wife and have the cloned wife on the moon and the real wife down here, would that be considered cheating?
All knowledge is of itself of some value. There is nothing so minute or inconsiderable, that I would not rather know it than not. In the same manner, all power, of whatever sort, is of itself desirable. A man would not submit to learn to hem a ruffle, of his wife, or his wife's maid; but if a mere wish could attain it, he would rather wish to be able to hem a ruffle.
The reason I keep talking about a wife and saying the word wife on stage is because it seems a funny word to me. The more you say it, the more it seems to detach from that person and become this sort of abstract thing: that you would set out to find a wife, that it would be an objective like buying a new car.
The reason I keep talking about a wife and saying the word 'wife' on stage is because it seems a funny word to me. The more you say it, the more it seems to detach from that person and become this sort of abstract thing: that you would set out to find a wife, that it would be an objective like buying a new car.
We like to say 'husband' and 'wife' a lot. I say, 'husband, where are you?' He says, 'where is my wife? How is my wife doing?'
She thought about how marvelous is would be to have a wife keeping the house in order, the meals on the table. At the same time it seemed ridiculously unfair that she could never have a wife. In fact, if she married, she would be expected to be the wife.
I think you learn more about Donald Trump when you learn more about his wife Melania. She can say things, but it's more how much did you get to know her and believe the kind of person she is, that could be married successfully to him. So once you realize that there's something there, that there's substance and that she's got talents and abilities, you think "this is a very complex woman and not just a pretty face" and you know they have a pretty successful marriage and I think that speaks well of him.
There's no one more valuable for me to learn from than Tom and his wife, Gisele Bundchen, in a lot of ways. Every time I'm around them, I learn. The way they are with their kids, the way they make time to spend with each other, they are just good people.
When people meet my wife they think better of me. They say: "With a wife like that, he can't be as bad as we thought".
You live, you learn, you love, you learn, you cry, you learn, you lose, you learn, you bleed, you learn, you scream, you learn
My wife's nagging is like living near the airport. After a while you don't notice it any more.
If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.
My wife tells me I need to learn to be more patient with my son.
To kill time, I went to learn dance and there I met my to-be wife. She is a choreographer.