A Quote by Mike Epps

They have what you call a black night where they have black people come in for just one night only to watch comedy, and you get all your local drug dealers, thugs, prostitutes, all of them come in, sit down, and listen to you tell jokes. They the hardest people to make laugh.

Mike Epps

Quote Topics

Black Black People Call Come Comedy Dealers Down Drug Drug Dealers Get Hardest Jokes Just Just One Laugh Listen Local Make Night One Night Only People Sit Tell Them Thugs Watch Your

Quote Author

Mike Epps
American - Comedian
Born: November 18, 1970

I think one of my first jokes - in the black community, there's people who have jokes about skin tone. People like, 'You so black, you purple.' 'You so black, you gotta smile so we can see you at night.'

Hannibal Buress

With YouTube streaming and Twitch and all that, you can just hop on on any given night and play videogames and have people come watch you. And even if you've only got 400 people watching your stream, that's more people than would see my comedy if I went to UCB.

Thomas Middleditch

Franz Kafka is dead. He died in a tree from which he wouldn't come down. "Come down!" they cried to him. "Come down! Come down!" Silence filled the night, and the night filled the silence, while they waited for Kafka to speak. "I can't," he finally said, with a note of wistfulness. "Why?" they cried. Stars spilled across the black sky. "Because then you'll stop asking for me."

Nicole Krauss

Basically what I'm trying to tell you is that it's almost impossible to drive a jet ski at night time unless you're in a city with lights lit up so you can navigate. Besides being pitch black, that water turn black at night. Listen, I don't recommend it.

DJ Khaled

There is no late-night comedy. You watch comedy, you watch whenever you want to tune on. You can it in the middle of the night. You can it in the morning. It's all comedy. They just label it late-night comedy so they don't have to pay as much.

George Schlatter

I sit my three sons down and say, 'Listen to me. When the police stop you, immediately comply. Don't walk away, don't smart-mouth; get your hands up and get down on the ground.' If you're not black, you might not have to have that conversation, but I go over and over it with them because I don't want that phone call.

Steve Harvey

Let's stop all of this foolishness and come together as a people or we will deserve the chastisement of God that is about to come down. Especially on the rich and the professional well-educated Black person who could make a way in the desert for our people, but you're so tied to your slavemasters and their children. You don't want to leave them nor do you want to lead your people into doing something for self. We're at the end of it now.

Louis Farrakhan

I would sit at the table with the black kids during lunch, and we'd do our banter back and forth. But occasionally, I'd get up and I'd go sit down with the white kids and chat with them and what not. Of course, because I come from the black table they would look at me like, 'Why are you here?'

Ron Stallworth

I try to write three jokes every day. I don't sit down and write them, it's just things that pop into my head. Then I'll go watch it fail onstage that night.

Zach Galifianakis

I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches the Oscars? Show me one. And they don't recognize comedy, and you don't see a lot of black people nominated, so why should I watch it?

Chris Rock

I was raised in a completely black world. In those days, if a white woman married a black man, she lived as a black woman, and that was just the end of it. So, I don't have a feeling of being bi-racial. I don't have a connection to it. People often come up to me thinking I do have a connection to it, and I kind of let them down because I really don't.

Shelby Steele

The first purpose of comedy is to make people laugh. Anything deeper is a bonus. Some comedians want to make people laugh and make them think about socially relevant issues, but comedy, by the very nature of the word, is to make people laugh. If people aren't laughing, it's not comedy. It's as simple as that.

Trevor Noah

Black people in America have come from slavery to other forms of being oppressed and there are some things that come with that - some pain and anger that come with that and we as black people have to deal with it to heal that. White people have to understand it and have some compassion toward it.

Common

Every now and then you get a nice Jewish kid who likes black people and they would come in, and it would be a stream of them, and have black friends and really feel the black struggle on the acting tip and it's a reason why all of us are not dying in the movie.

Mike Epps

I learned all those jokes in second grade. Second grade is really where they tell you those horrific jokes, racist jokes and misogynistic jokes that you have no idea what they mean, and you just memorize them because they have a very strong effect, they make people laugh in this kind of nervous, horrible way, and it's only later that you realize that you've got a head full of crap.