A Quote by Mitch Hedberg

You know when you go into a restaurant, and it gets busy and they start a waiting list, and they start calling out names, "DuFresnes, party of two." They say again, "DuFresnes, party of two." But then if no one answers, they'll just go to the next name, "Bush, party of three." Yeah, but what happened to the DuFresnes? No one seems to care. Who can eat at a time like this? People are missing! And they're hungry! That's a double whammy! "Bush, search party of three!" You can eat once you find the DuFresnes!
I can throw a great party, but I don't know how to go to one. I can throw a party because when you throw a party you just work all the time. But I could never go to a party because I wouldn't know what to do ... I'd immediately find the kitchen and start to serve food.
Every new party, every new bunch of people, and I start thinking that maybe this is my chance.That I'm going to be normal this time. A new leaf. A fresh start. But then I find myself at the party, thinking, Oh, yeah. This again.
I always start my discussions with the Tea Party groups with telling them, 'you know I have only three words for you: God. Bless. You.' Because the Tea Party's bringing the Republican party back to a more conservative base.
The time has passed in America when this party can be the party of compassion and let the executive branch run foreign policy. It won't work. We have to be the party that can stand toe to toe with George W. Bush on national security, as well as the party of compassion.
I have been saying for the some time now that America has only one party - the property party. It's the party of big corporation, the party of money. It has two right wings; one is Democrat and the other is Republican.
I do this thing at every party: I go to a party, I stand around for, like, 45 minutes, and then I turn to my wife and say, 'I think we should go home.' And then we leave, and then I wake up the next morning and say to my wife, 'We don't go out anymore.' It's a great trick.
The Democratic Party has been a party of reaction - a party of opposition, complaining about Trump and the Republicans, rather than offering a lot of our own ideas and our own vision. And my view is that if Democrats want to start winning again, we have to start leading again.
In America, we have a two-party system, and the American Constitution is a piece of brilliance, but they did not know when they set it up we would just have a two-party system. It just so happens that our electorate pushed towards the two-party system because it's a very good way to govern.
Casting is sometimes like going to a party. You get there and everybody at the party is wonderful. They're funny, they're interesting, and the next time you go to a party, you kind of want those same people there. I do find myself going back to a lot of the same actors I've worked with because it was fun, it was good and I know they can do the job. When we have tight deadlines to cast a project, that's how some decisions are made.
My party was the party which was created by Mr Mohammad Ali Jinnah. He didn't create that party. But he was the main pillar of the party. Our party is a very forward-looking, progressive, democratic party.
I want to see what the Green Party looks like. I think if people don't start voting what they feel, if that's something other than the Democratic Party or the Republican Party, then nothing's going to change. You need more political parties that actually have a chance.
If you're a prostitute, this is your day: You party, you have customers until four or six in the morning, then you sleep. You wake at noon, watch soaps on TV, take two or three hours to fancy up yourself, and then you start waiting for customers. That's your life. And some days no customers come. There's no party. There's nothing. You sit there and wait. If you're educated you can read books, but in Bangladesh and most other places you watch TV or listen to music or cook.
There is no real third party in America. There's this one party that has two sides to it - the Democratic and Republican side. It's one party that has two heads.
I don't understand how the Republican party is the party with the reputation for fiscal conservatism and fiscal sanity, when they're the ones who run up the debt. It was Reagan who ran up the debt and now Bush is doing it again, and in between, Clinton and Bush's father, I must say, worked so hard to get that deficit and that debt down.
We don't need a two-party system. We need something else. Because at this point, the two-party system is really just a one-party system. And that one party is crumbling.
The Republican Party is like the corpse in 'Weekend at Bernies' and the Tea Party is like the two guys who put sunglasses and a party hat on it and drag it around.
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