A Quote by Mithila Palkar
My grandfather was wary of me being a part of the industry for various reasons, ranging from the fact that we didn't know anybody; it was an unconventional career choice, and because he felt that I needed somebody to guide me.
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When I was still a bright-eyed McKinsey consultant, I remember hitting a point where I didn't know what to do next, and someone gave me the book, 'How Remarkable Women Lead,' and I read it and scribbled in it, and it felt like a guide in helping me figure out my career.
I'm inspired to post a lot of positive messages on my social media because, growing up, I felt as though I needed somebody that looked like me in the limelight or in entertainment to promote being different and promote accepting your differences.
It hurts more than anything in the world because even though it might not be the case, it feels like you've chosen your child over me. 'I haven't there is no choice. She's part of me. You're part of me too. It's like...I don't know...asking me to pick between my heart and my lungs.' 'I know, but the thing is, you are my heart and my lungs. You're everything to me. And what hurts is that I know i used to be everything to you.
Everyone enjoys downtime at home, I'm sure, for various reasons, but I find the whole system of being out there and doing shows for people - the more of it you do, in fact the more energizing it is, for me individually.
For the first ten years of my career, I felt suffocated. People constantly stood over me while I tried to create. And in 2009, I hit rock bottom. I couldn't find myself because I was looking to be defined by the music industry or by being number one on the Billboard charts.
You don't have to be anybody... because I would know, being somebody doesn't make you anybody anyway.
I am somebody who never dreamed of being a part of this industry. I thank Salman for giving me the opportunity. I never thought that I could be a part of the film world without him.
Being a Christian executive in Hollywood has contributed to me fulfilling my destiny. Hollywood respects the maverick, the person who's unique and has the confidence to defy the system and everyone who tells them they're wrong in order to follow their vision. It's been me embracing by Christianity that has made me different, unique, and of value in my industry. Maintaining who I am and who God wants me to be throughout my career is what keeps me on the path to having the career I desire. I know what I value, and I never deviate from that no matter what.
However, for story reasons, we needed to represent them in certain ways. One of the things that sort of blew me away that I didn't know when we started is that memories are completely susceptible to change. And this is, you know, one of the many reasons why certain people are trying to get it taken out - eyewitness testimony in court cases because it's very unreliable.
I was in college - Carnegie Mellon, which is one of the reasons Pittsburgh was appealing to me - and I personally feel that whole world of what we used to call "college radio" is a big part of what kept me sane through a period where I stopped dating, I felt like a freak, I felt like no girl would like me. You know, a very adolescent response to losing my hair. I turned to obsessing about The Replacements and The Smiths and R.E.M. and getting further into The Velvet Underground. People who, in my sheltered suburban life, I knew of, but didn't know fully.
Gaga and Stefani are my nicknames. I guess when people meet me for the first time and call me Stefani, it bothers me. Because it's something that's reserved for only the people who are closest to me. It's not because I don't like my given name; it's that I became somebody else. I became somebody else for a reason, you know. This is part of what my message is - you can become whoever you want to be, to escape your past.
I was born in an odd spot and was a very sensitive kid. My feelings could get hurt so easily because I always wanted to be loved, I wanted to be touched, I wanted to touch somebody. I wanted everybody to love me, so I think I was louder than I should have been. I was just trying to get attention. I always felt like I was somebody special, maybe it's because I needed to be somebody special.
I've always felt I've related to women deeply because of being gay and feeling like there was always somebody trying to oppress me, to keep me down, to put me in my place.
I'm able to lead my life as well as make a film. My wife and my friends and people around me know that I do tend to distance myself a little bit during the making of a film, but I have to, it's a natural part of the process for me because you are indulging in the headspace of somebody else, you are investing in the psychology of somebody else and you are becoming somebody else, and so there isn't enough room for you and that somebody else.
It's taken me a long time to get back into the industry. People were not really open to me working, or being a part of the industry.
I hid the fact that I had an aneurysm for a very long time. I was embarrassed, and I just felt like no one needed to know because it made me look weak. Who would of thought someone my age, at 23, had a brain aneurysm?
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