A Quote by Mordicai Gerstein
If I keep coming back to a painting and there's a little something that bothers me, I know I'm not going to get away with it. I'm going to have to fix it, change it, whatever it is, to something that I'm comfortable with, that doesn't make me itch when I look at it.
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I'm a deeply privileged person. I have a safe, comfortable life, and there's very little at risk for me. I'm not going to get disowned by my family for talking about having an abortion, and I'm not risking my job or homelessness by saying something controversial that my employer might not like. I have this gift of stability and it feels obligatory to use that to make the world better in whatever small ways I can. It's incredibly fulfilling. Even helping one person feel a little bit better is really important to me and makes me feel like my life means something.
When I was younger there was something in me. I had passion. I may not have known what I was going to do with that passion, but there was something-and I still feel it. It's this little engine that roars inside of me and I just want to keep going and going.
I'm a really smart player. If you tell me something, I get it quickly. If there is something wrong with my hitting, tell me what's wrong and I'll pick it up right away. That's the best thing I have going for me, my ability to listen to a coach and fix what I'm doing wrong.
I think being honest with one another creates an environment that's comfortable. You want to know where you stand, whether you're doing a good job. The players know what's going on before you do. They're trying to see if you're going to do something about it. And when it's not like that, everybody is pissed off, because they know that people can get away with stuff and that nobody is keeping them in line. That's not a team to me.
A lot of my friends they call me 'the therapist'. They come to me looking for advice. I must be doing something right because they keep coming back. But I'm not very good at kind of looking into my own world and trying to pick apart what is really wrong and fix those things. I like to kind of shy away from certain issues and turn away.
It's crazy. I don't know how I'm not dead. People think I'm going to get punched in the face: "Something terrible is going to happen to you. You're going to get killed." That's not what's going to kill me. The show is going to kill me. The work is going to kill me. Once I'm on the street, I'm not worried about that.
I was still owed an explanation, I thought, but so what? What good was it going to do me? It wouldn't have made me any happier. It was like scratching when you have chicken pox. You think it's going to help, but the itch moves over, and then moves over again. My itch suddenly felt miles away, and I couldn't have reached it with the longest arms in the world. Realizing that made me scared that I was going to be itchy forever, and I didn't want that.
A couple years ago I was going to back off and actually thought about retiring, but it keeps calling me back, and I'm going to keep going back as long as it calls me. I really think it has something to do with the good vibes that I feel I've spread through my performance and through the time that I've spent with fans.
Change to me is like an old friend. It's not my enemy anymore. And I know it will keep coming back to visit again and again to teach me something new.
My mom always taught me - you know, little boys listen to their moms too much - that whatever you put into something is what you're going to get out of it.
What I keep going back to, and what keeps me going, is trying to do good in whatever little spot of the world we can influence, no matter how small.
For me, I felt bad for people asking the questions, cause you know their boss sent them out saying, 'Get me something on Mission Impossible.' And you ask the question, and it's just a polite, 'I'm not going to tell you.' Then, every so often, they'd go, 'Well, can't you just tell us a little bit?' I have to say, 'You know what guys, I'm under contract and I'm not going to tell you anything.' So you keep asking the questions and I'm just going to keep smiling. And it's hard, cause I don't want to seem rude, but it's part of my job just like it's part of their job to keep a secret.
Money can make people look at you in strange ways. You get phone calls from people you haven't spoken with in a long time, and they'll leave a message saying, 'Do me a favor, call me back. I have something I want to ask you.' I'm not going to answer those calls, because there's always something behind it, like a loan.
I led the NFL in attempts the past two years and they really didn’t go out and get a quarterback to help me so I knew it’s going to be all on me again. I could see my mortality as a football player, that I’m not going to be able to do this much longer. It just became obvious to me that playing football for me is not going to be fun, not something I’m going to enjoy and it’s time for me to do something different.
In the future, I just think that as far as when it comes to me and my music, I'm trying to help be the catalyst for whatever is going to inspire more people and keep a great creative community going. Whatever I can do to make everyone's records better, not just my own, just hopefully keep the whole flow of stuff going in a good direction. That's what I'll be doing, so look forward to whatever I'm involved with it and hopefully I can inspire the next generation.
When you play me, I'm going to get right up in your grill and let you know it's going to be a long day. It's going to be physical. It's going to be something you don't like. It's going to be hell.
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