A Quote by Nathan Sawaya
I see the world in rectangles. If I am talking to someone, I find myself analysing their face, working out how to recreate it in bricks.
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I don't like talking about myself; I'm not good at analysing myself. I don't want to analyse myself.
I feel like I don't see myself as all that different from other humans as a woman, but I'm surprised by how frequently I'm asked to see myself differently. So that's one kind of terror to have to face. Am I a unicorn? What's sticking out of my head that I'm not seeing? I'm simply female, and that puts me alongside all of my human counterparts.
I believe I've shown my worth, become a world champion, now I want to try and see how good I am. The only way I'll find that out is by testing myself against the best.
Ever since I did that 57.9 last year, the Americans have been analysing me in detail. You can see on the swimming web pages. They are breaking it down in every detail. How many strokes I take. How quick I am in and out of the wall.
You can talk yourself out of doing something if you start to think about, "How would this person see it, or that person see it?" So sometimes it's allowing myself to be in it and not talking myself out of it.
I lead a very active lifestyle. When I am not working, I enjoy snowboarding in winter. I golf and swim in the summer months. However, trying to find the time to exercise when I am traveling is quite a challenge. I find myself working out at hotel gyms quite regularly - just so that I can keep up with my training.
When I am talking to someone, I can constantly see whether I am failing or succeeding. I am regulating what I am saying in terms of how I think I'm doing. I'm always searching for the truth of a subject or person, and I look at every meeting as a grand experiment.
I just picked up a camera without any kind of ambition to be good or bad. And especially without any ambition to make a living... My whole freedom working in photography comes because I say to myself, Let's see what is going on in this world. Let's find out. How do these people look?
...I started photographing myself, and found that I could see portions of myself that I had never seen before. Since I face just my face in the mirror, I know pretty much what it's like. When I see a side-view I'm not used to it, and find it peculiar... So, photographing myself and discovering unknown territories of my surface self causes an interesting psychological confrontation.
I am more interested in people's attitude than someone who is a perfect face. Every time I walk the streets of London, I see someone who interests me. It doesn't matter how old they are.
The primary goal I set for myself on how I define what success looks like for me is am I working at a company that matters? Am I working with somebody who I think affects positive change? Am I providing a benefit to my family? Am I enjoying myself? Why would I put a limitation on my enjoyment? There is an old view on Wall Street that says, 'They love you until they don't.' I am going to stay happy until I am not.
There are actually times when there are crimes out there in the world and I find myself trying to figure it out and I ask myself, what am I doing?
Repetition is hell. How can we get out of those cycles of violence? How come we are still today talking about peace in Israel? How come we're not able to find a solution yet? Something that will bring peace in this part of the world? It's the same in a lot of places in the world right now. How come we are not able to find peace?
I used to help out my father, a bricklayer, in the summer. I'd catch the bricks (that were dropped). And it made me strong, catching those bricks. I wouldn't change anything about it. That's why I'm where I am today. Really.
My importance to the world is relatively small. On the other hand, my importance to myself is tremendous. I am all I have to work with, to play with, to suffer and to enjoy. It is not the eyes of others that I am wary of, but of my own. I do not intend to let myself down more than I can possibly help, and I find that the fewer illusions I have about myself or the world around me, the better company I am for myself.
Now I wonder whether I have sufficiently realized that during all this time God has been trying to find me, to know me, and to love me. The question is not 'How am I to find God?' but 'How am I to let myself be found by him?' The question is not 'How am I to love God?' but 'How am I to let myself be loved by God?'
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