A Quote by P. J. O'Rourke

I've always figured that if God wanted us to go to church a lot He'd have given us bigger behinds to sit on and smaller heads to think with. — © P. J. O'Rourke
I've always figured that if God wanted us to go to church a lot He'd have given us bigger behinds to sit on and smaller heads to think with.
President Obama really just let all of us genuinely be who we were and didn't expect — I'm goofy. And so for him, he just never expected us to be any different than who we were and he wanted us to always give our opinions. He is not the kind of person who wanted to sit around and be told he was right all the time. Especially if he wasn't. And I think that seeing that in him made us all take that away with us.
Think of the enormous leisure of God! He is never in a hurry. We are always in such a frantic hurry. In the light of the glory of the vision we go forth to do things, but the vision is not real in us yet; and God has to take us into the valley, and put us through fires and floods to batter us into shape, until we get to the place where He can trust us.... Let Him put you on His wheel and whirl you as He likes, and as sure as God is God and you are you, you will turn out exactly in accordance with the vision. Don't lose heart in the process.
Each of us has a Soul. But no one has stopped to tell us what the Soul is in the world to do. Or if they have told us, they've given us incomplete information - for example, that our job is to get back to God. That is not our job. We couldn't get back to God if we wanted to, because we never left God.
If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.
If God wanted us high, He would have given us wings.
God is not calling us to go to church; he is calling us to be his church, the hope of the world.
There's an old saying in the space community: 'If God wanted us to be a spacefaring species, he would have given us a moon'.
I feel that if God had really wanted us to have enough oil, he would never have given us a Department of Energy.
God has given us everything we need for life and godliness. And he's given us the indwelling strength and guidance of the Holy Spirit. The rest is up to us.
I preach that anybody can improve their lives. I think God wants us to be prosperous. I think he wants us to be happy. To me, you need to have money to pay your bills. I think God wants us to send our kids to college. I think he wants us to be a blessing to other people. But I don't think I'd say God wants us to be rich. It's all relative, isn't it?
I think the Church is a conduit to God. The Church is not God. And I think that from the very beginning Jesus taught us that.
Christ became our Brother in order to help us. Through him our brother has become Christ for us in the power and authority of the commission Christ has given him. Our brother stands before us the sign of the truth and the grace of God. He has been given to us to help us. He hears the confession of our sins in Christ's stead and he forgives our sins in Christ's name. He keeps the secret of our confession as God keeps it. When I go to my brother to confess, I am going to God.
Ant & Dec have always nicked stuff off us. We met their writers, they said they just trawl our stuff and adapt it. The problem is they're a lot bigger than us, so people think we're copying them.
There is the Jewish Agency, which gets a lot of money from the United States, from American Jews, whose sole job it is to create settlements. It enlists people all over the world - especially in Russia, and in the United States, by the way - to come and settle in the Occupied Territories as a kind of religious statement, a kind of nationalist statement: "This is a country given to us by God." A lot of Israelis who do not believe in God believe that God has given us this country.
Prayer is a gift from Almighty God that transforms us, whether we bow our heads in solitude, or offer swift and silent prayers in times of trial. Prayer humbles us by reminding us of our place in creation. Prayer strengthens us by reminding us that God loves and cares for each and every soul in His creation. And prayer blesses us by reminding us that there is a divine plan that stands above all human plans.
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