A Quote by Patton Oswalt

I remember, when 9/11 went down, my reaction was, 'Well, I've had it with humanity.' But I was wrong. — © Patton Oswalt
I remember, when 9/11 went down, my reaction was, 'Well, I've had it with humanity.' But I was wrong.
The Clinton Foundation has had to refile their taxes. And I remember when the first report came, the reaction everybody had. "Well, how come they get to do it again instead of being penalized for it? You file wrong, and you make a mistake, and they're gonna come at you and demand penalties and what. The Clintons made a mistake three times and they're allowed to refile?" And then we realize what the IRS did to Tea Party fundraising groups, denying them status.
I remember a class I taught at Ohio State where I assigned a Mary Gaitskill story, which really wasn't that bad, and I had this one girl refuse to read it. But better that reaction than no reaction at all.
One of the high points in my career came from a time I had with Tim Conway on a film when I had him fall down with laughter. I had this scene with him where I was this mechanic down fixing his car. I can't remember what my line was as written, but they were okay with me doing a made-up line. So Tim asks me what's wrong with his car, and I look up and say, "Well, looks like you got a squirrel caught up in there."
Today is 11/11/11, a date so simple even Rick Perry can remember it.
Poor Englishwomen! When it comes to their clothes- well, the French reaction is a shrug, the Italian reaction a spreading of the hands and a lifting of the eyes and the American reaction simply one of amused contempt.
I didn't confess. I was interrogated. They acted like my answers were wrong. They told me I was wrong, that I didn't remember correctly, that I had to remember correctly. And if I didn't, I would never see my family.
To do well does not mean everything will always turn out well. The key is to remember that faith and obedience are still the answers, even when things go wrong, perhaps especially when things go wrong.
Right after 9/11, I mean, every agency can give their own gradation, but a nice, popular rule of thumb is everybody doubled down. I ended up in the NSA with about twice as much money as I had prior to 9/11.
Right after 9/11, I mean, every agency can give their own gradation, but a nice, popular rule of thumb is everybody doubled down. I ended up in NSA with about twice as much money as I had prior to 9/11.
Of all the preposterous assumptions of humanity over humanity, nothing exceeds most of the criticisms made on the habits of the poor by the well-housed, well- warmed, and well-fed.
In America you can be Donald Trump, have a business go wrong, and file for Chapter 11. You can move on, and no one complains. When his casinos were in Chapter 11, he was still on TV telling people how to get rich. I had to persevere for years with easyInternet because I couldn't afford to hurt the brand.
I have bad-mom moments all the time. Sometimes I have the wrong reaction, but I try to remember to pull back and think about it. Even when I make the mistake, I'm able to then go, 'Oh, okay, let's do this again.'
I had a lot of fun during all the performances, but the most memorable one was 'Born This Way.' Lady Gaga is one of our favorite artists, and I remember the Once in America had the best reaction when we performed that song for them.
After 9/11, we had to look at the world differently. After 9/11, we had to recognize that when we saw a threat, we must take it seriously before it comes to hurt us. In the old days we'd see a threat, and we could deal with it if we felt like it or not. But 9/11 changed it all.
Well, our position, and our chairman has talked about this extensively, is that we had a lot of intelligence prior to 9/11. We knew that two al Qaeda operatives who ultimately participated in the 9/11 disaster were in the United States. We didn't find them.
So often, we blame other people when, really, the problem is right down in here. I'm not happy. I don't know what's wrong. If I just had another job, I could be happy. If I just get married, I would be happy. Well if I just wasn't married, I would be happy. Well, if I just had some kids, I'll be happy. I'll be happy when these kids finally grow up and get out of here. If I had a bigger house, I would be happy. Well, I got a big house. Now if I just had a maid to clean, I'd be happy. Well, now if I just had a maid I could get along with better, I'd be happy.
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