I have empathy towards bullying. Not about punishing the bully but empowering the victim. We have a tendency to use the word "bully" and other words in the wrong situations, thus desensitizing and lessening the impact of the true situation.
Recently there's been a trend to apply the term "bullying" to any kind of conflict at work, for example overwork and long hours. Although some bullying behaviours may be present in these issues, in my view this dilutes and devalues the term "workplace bullying" which should be used only for the more serious cases of conflict involving a serial bully. If there isn't a serial bully involved, it's probably not bullying you're dealing with.
I'm so old... when I was a kid, in order for someone to bully, they had to be bigger and stronger and more intimidating than the people they were bullying. Now with social media and Facebook and Twitter and all those other things, anyone can bully somebody.
Everyone in America likely has a bullying story, whether as the victim, bully or as a witness.
A bully has no respect for a weakling and the way to stop a bully is not to be weak. The way to stop a bully from ever being a bully is to say: "I'm as strong as you. Anything you do to me, I can do to you." We are going for nuclear and conventional disarmament but we're going about it in the right way.
If you give in to the threat of violence, if you give in to bullying, what you know is that there will be more bullying. There will not be less bullying. If you appease the bully, you make sure that he will bully you some more. Not less. It doesn't solve the problem. It makes the problem worse.
I was a bully in fifth and sixth grade. I wasn't one of the bullies - I wasn't strong or dominant enough to be one of the kids who bullied everyone in equal measure. I was a bully, in that I bullied a kid, whose name I won't mention here. My bullying was selective and personal.
In terms of bullying, there are so many new laws in America, I am not sure about worldwide, but in America, the laws for bullying are getting strict. And I am really excited of how strict they are and I think it has cut down on a lot of bullying. As a kid I was a bully and I was bullied. I lived both sides of it. To see what is being done with bullying now is super important.
Not everyone has been a bully or the victim of bullies, but everyone has seen bullying, and seeing it, has responded to it by joining in or objecting, by laughing or keeping silent, by feeling disgusted or feeling interested.
Negotiation is empathy. It's almost trite to say that if you can't put yourself in the seat of the other person you're speaking with, you're not going to do well. It's not about being a bully, not about making offers people can't refuse.
I know where "Blubber" came from. It came from stories that my daughter told me when she came home from fifth grade. There was a kid in the class who was being bullied. We didn't even call it bullying then, that's what's so weird. Victimization in the classroom. The word bully was so out, was so not in use for all those years and now it's back big time.
I had my bully, and it was excruciating. Not only the bully, but the intimidation I felt.
I realized that bullying never has to do with you. It's the bully who's insecure.
There's only one thing a bully respected: bigger bully.
A bully is a bully, and it's important that you stand up to them.
Trolls want reactions. Don't become a bully because they're bullying you!