A Quote by Rhea Perlman

I watched 'The Neighbors' when it first came on, and I thought it was hysterical. And every time I think something just tickles my funny bone, I call my agent and say, 'You know, I like this show. If they're ever looking for somebody, I'd like to work with them.'
Somebody said, 'Get your agent to call the new Bob Cummings show. They're looking for a funny lady.' Within three hours, I had the job. That was January 1955. I had such fun with that show.
I was being rejected all the time. Agents would say, 'I don't think you're the type they're looking for.' I was always like, 'You think? I don't want you to think. I want them to think that.' This business is all about someone's opinion, but not the agent or the manager's. How do they know? They're not that person.
When I say something funny, I don’t laugh, so my friends are always like, ‘Hahahahaaaa!’ so people know. When I’m not with them, I always think, This person doesn’t know I’m funny; they just think I’m a jerk.
Just because you "liked" my picture, doesn't mean you shouldn't call me and ask me how I'm doing. You know what's funny? If you ever owe someone a call, and it's something you're trying to avoid, notice how many times they "like" your photos until you call them back. It's an alarm, and people abuse that. They know you can see that. They know you'll see their name.
Women do it all the time to look younger and it would make perfect sense if one of them ever came out looking younger - but they don't. They just look the same; they all get plastic surgery face. No matter who they look like going in, they all come out looking like the girl from the band on 'The Muppet Show.
If you want to have the right to have that conversation with your agent - "I know you sent it to me, I know you like it, but I just really think it's terrible" - you need to have the full details about script. You don't want to be in that situation where your agent says, "What about after the first 20 pages where it turns into a psychedelic musical?" And you're like "What? I thought it was an action-rom!"
It's funny, but have you ever noticed that the more special something is, the more people seem to take it for granted? It's like they think it won't ever change. Just like this house here. All it ever needed was a little attention, and it would never have ended up like this in the first place.
Comedy started out as my hobby and then it became my profession. It's like being on call all the time, like having a built-in beeper. You can't just leave the office and relax because you never know when you'll think of something funny.
To me, every episode is like a song, and every season is like an album. There's that part of the day when you first get the idea and you say, "This could be really funny." And you sit down and you write it. There's just something that happens there that doesn't happen when you really give it a lot of time beforehand.
Life is very tough, you know. You sit at a dinner party and talk to the person on your right or your left, you're going to hear something terribly sad, or horrible, or awful. And you just laugh at everything. I think it was Winston Churchill who said something like, any time you get someone to laugh, you're giving them a little vacation. It's so true. You laugh for one second, you're happy. I find in negotiations, everybody's sitting around looking so serious, I say something funny and it breaks the ice. And it's like, now we can get through this.
That's something - you laugh about Eminem... It's funny, man, because I didn't like him when he first came out, ya know. It seemed like a big joke. But I think the guy's for real, and I like his lyrics!
When I first came to the U.S. - because I do accents and I've traveled the world. I have friends of almost every single ethnicity, and I would mimic them. And when I came to the U.S., I remember one day we're at "The Daily Show." And I mimicked my Chinese friend. And the guys at the show were like, oh, hey, don't ever do that again. That's really racist.
Somebody has to give a wakeup call to our coaching world to ask them real questions and show them that if you have kids, then you know there is no way you can talk to somebody else like that, because that's somebody's child.
The psychiatrist wants to know why I go out and hike around in the forests and watch the birds and collect butterflies. I'll show you my collection some day.Good.They want to know what I do with my time. I tell them that sometimes I just sit and think. But I won't tell them what. I've got them running. And sometimes, I tell them, I like to put my head back, like this, and let the rain fall in my mouth. It tastes just like wine. Have you ever tried it?
Kids will tell me 'oh I want to be like you when I grow up,' you know. I just thought 'nah, don't be like me, be like you,' because first of all they don't really know me but second of all I understand what they're trying to say but I just let them know - be like you.
Every time I go to work, I feel like it's the first time; I feel terrified and excited and exhilarated and like a deer in the headlights. I think: how do I do this? And then it just happens. Like riding a bike, you know?
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