A Quote by Rodney Dangerfield

I tell ya, my wife's a lousy cook. After dinner, I don't brush my teeth. I count them.

Rodney Dangerfield

Quote Topics

After Brush Cook Count Dinner Lousy My Wife Teeth Tell Them Wife Ya

Quote Author

Rodney Dangerfield
American - Comedian
November 22, 1921 - October 5, 2004

OK, I floss, I brush my teeth, and I use mouth wash. Does that mean that I love it? That means that I, you know, like to look after my teeth!

Sonny Bill Williams

My kids are always in the kitchen with me - I bring them to the bakery and let them decorate cakes, and they also try to help me and my wife, Lisa, cook dinner at night.

Buddy Valastro

If you brush your teeth, you don't want to eat something right after because your mouth feels so fresh. So brushing your teeth actually prevents you from eating until later.

Cloris Leachman

My grandmother used to cook for eight every day - sitting down lunches and dinner, the way you do it in Italy, you sit down. And when my parents could afford their own place, I went with them but still my mother used to work but used to come back from work to cook lunch for my father, come back from work, cook dinner for my father and me.

Carrie Ann Inaba

Then I say, "Let's go and brush our teeth." So Lola says, "But Charlie, I can't brush my teeth because somebody is using my tooth." "But who would use your toothbrush?" I ask. Lola says "I think that lion. I saw a lion with my toothbrush and now he's brushing his teeth with it." "But it isn't this your toothbrush Lola?" "Oh," says Lola, "he must be using yours.

Lauren Child

I'm one of those people who has a toothbrush and toothpaste with me at all times. After lunch, I'll brush my teeth in a restaurant bathroom!

Morena Baccarin

I will tell you, I'm a lousy cook, but I think I'm a pretty good judge of a good meal.

Barney Frank

And I'll tell ya, I'm really enjoying this marriage thing. You think about each other. You care about each other. It's wonderful! Plus, I love saying 'my wife.' Once I started saying it, I couldn't stop - 'my wife' this, 'my wife' that...it's an amazing way to begin a sentence.

Jerry Seinfeld

Water conservation goes hand in hand with education. Teaching people that if you literally run the water while you brush your teeth - we go through 602 million gallons a day of waste in the United States because people are used to hearing the water run while they brush their teeth.

Ian Somerhalder

There is one thing more exasperating than a wife who can cook and won't, and that's a wife who can't cook and will.

Robert Frost

I somehow make it through the first month. I dress and brush my teeth when they tell me to. And I experience the hollow feeling of complete loss, which is emptiness.

Holly Goldberg Sloan

I tell ya, with my wife, I got no sex life. Her favorite position is facing Bloomingdale's.

Rodney Dangerfield

I enjoy watching a woman with really bad teeth and a good sense of humor struggling to use her lips and tongue to hide her teeth when she's laughing. I just stand there and tell her joke after joke after joke.

George Carlin

I tell ya, it's tough to save a buck. Right now I'm supporting two fighters. My wife and her mother.

Rodney Dangerfield

I don't cook - I can cook - but I'm not very good. I like being asked over for dinner, because she can't cook either. We would starve if it weren't for modern technology. I know how to work a microwave, but love home cooked meals.

Mark Mothersbaugh

I'm a really good cook. I bake a lot. I cook dinner most nights. I cook everything from Italian food to Mexican food. But if I'm going to some place and it's a potluck, I'm always the one to bring dessert!

Amanda Schull

A Quote by Rodney Dangerfield

Quote Topics

Quote Author

Related Quotes

Related Authors