A Quote by Rodney Dangerfield

My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.

Rodney Dangerfield

Quote Topics

Chair Dying Electric Electric Chair His Lap Me Uncle Wanted Wish

Quote Author

Rodney Dangerfield
American - Comedian
November 22, 1921 - October 5, 2004

Capital punishment, that thing scares me, it really does. I was talking to my friend about the electric chair, and he starts freakin' out. He's like 'the electric chair? That's too good for these people. That's too good for them'. Alright, how do we make the electric chair worse? How about this? They have to pedal a car battery to their own head. Is that ok? Is that enough, Mr. Hitler?

Dave Attell

She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.

Red Skelton

My uncle used to sit me on his lap and play "ventriloquist", only I wasn't wearing pants.

Thom Yorke

When I go to China, people call me 'Uncle Mo' because they refer me as Yao Ming's uncle. I'm pleased to be his uncle as long as he listens to me!

Dikembe Mutombo

If I give you a forty five percent chance at lethal injection, a fifty percent chance at the electric chair, and a five percent chance for escape which are you going to vote for? The electric chair, because youre likely to win?

Michael Badnarik

The cure for crime is not the electric chair, but the high chair.

J. Edgar Hoover

What a nasty act of cruelty, giving a dying man his last wish. Don't you realize he doesn't want it? His real wish is not to die.

Steve Toltz

Mourinho knows me! He sat in my lap as a little boy, and wanted his photograph taken with me. I knew his father and so I bounced little Jose on my knee. He always looked up to me.

Eusebio

When Liza Minelli was a child, she used to sit on my lap and call me Uncle Sammy.

Sammy Davis, Jr.

Oooh, if you have never been to Alaska, go there while it is still wild. My favorite uncle asked me if I wanted to go there, Uncle Sam. He said if you don't go, you're going to jail. That is how Uncle Sam asks you.

Bob Ross

The editor sat in his sanctum, his countenance furrowed with care, His mind at the bottom of business, his feet at the top of a chair, His chair-arm an elbow supporting, his right hand upholding his head, His eyes on his dusty old table, with different documents spread.

Will Carleton

We stepped back and looked at the king of the gods, slumped in his chair snoring, and cradling his crook like a teddy bear. I placed the war flail across his lap, hoping it might make a difference—maybe complete his powers or something. No such luck. "Sick weasels," Ra muttered. "Behold," Sadie said bitterly. "the glorious Ra.

Rick Riordan

I never staged a coup. They picked me up. Like I say, they forced me to become premier, maybe hoping that by that way, they send me to the electric chair.

Nguyen Cao Ky

I started swimming when I was four because my brother wanted to join a swim team, and I wanted to do what he did. They said I had to be six, but if I could swim a lap, then I could participate. So I swam a lap, and the rest is history.

Summer Sanders

He stares at me, and then leans back in his chair. "He's ill, Jacob." I say nothing. "He's a paragon schnitzophonic." "He's what?!" "Paragon schnitzophonic," repeats Uncle Al. "You mean paranoid schizophrenic?" "Sure. Whatever. But the bottom line is he's mad as a hatter.