A Quote by Shawne Merriman
I came down the long road, even before I got here. Just to be where I am today is already a positive in my life. But to have something like this happen to me as well, I'm speechless.
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I'm really just trying to hash out the next two weeks of my life. So, something that is potentially four months down the road is not just a mile down the road for me, it's a million miles down the road.
It may seem like I came out of the blue. But, my road was long, windy, full of hurdles, and even some dead ends. I lost family. I lost friends. I even lost my way. When I reached what felt like rock bottom, I realized I had a responsibility to everyone who believed in me and to kids, like me, who just needed a chance and something to believe in.
The Ninja Turtles made me who I am today in a big way. It was my favorite show as a kid. It got me into meditation, martial arts, speed boarding, and generally like the positive person that I am today is because of the Turtles.
I'm a very positive person, that's something that's like my character Savannah. She's very positive in everything that she does and I'm the same way in real life. If I feel like someone's trying to bring me down, I just walk away from it. I just ignore it because sometimes when that happens you can get so involved that it does bring down your day.
I just kinda do what I feel. I never knew what lane I would fill, [or that] I would fill a lane at all. I didn't even really contemplate that far down the road. I just started having fun, and a lot of that came from me seeing Wayne dare to be different, and I started feeling like I can be a multifaceted rapper. I don't have to be a one-dimensional female rapper. Once I put that in perspective, it was like everything just got easier for me, because I no longer wanted to fit in anybody's box... I just wanted to be Nicki.
I'm still happy with the way Einstein's Dreams came out. That book came out of a single inspiration. I really felt like I was not creating the words, that I was hearing the words. That someone else was speaking the words to me and I was just writing them down. It was a very strange experience. That can happen with a short book. I don't think it could happen with a long book.
The song was there before me, before I came along. I just sorta came down and just sorta took it down with a pencil, but it was there before I came around.
I like to think my dad was easygoing and kind, and I think some of those things have been passed down. I am like him in a sense of being positive and hopeful. He was compassionate, and I've got a lot of that in me as well.
Who am I? this or the other?
Am I one person today and tomorrow another?
Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others,
and before myself a contemptible woebegone weakling?
Or is something within me still like a beaten army fleeing
in disorder from a victory already achieved?
Who am I? They mock me, these lonely questions of mine.
Whoever I am, Thou knowest, O God, I am thine!
Coming down off the trail, I am lost in my own thoughts and unprepared when a bear chugs across the path just before it gives out on the gravel road. I am so distracted that I keep walking towards the bear. I only stop when it rears, stands on hind legs, and stares at me, sensitive nose pressed into the air, weak eyes searching. I have never been this close to a wild bear before, but I am not frightened. There is no menace in its stance; it is not even curious. The bear seems to know who or what I am. The bear is not impressed.
You got to want to evolve. It's something you can practice on but it just came to me. I wasn't really sitting there like, 'What can I do to get better?' It just came to me, talking to my people and my crew. They just tell me what my strongest and weakest points are at.
You know, I wouldn’t have done this a month ago. I wouldn’t have done it then. Then I was avoiding. Now I’m just waiting. Things happen to me. They do. They have to go ahead and happen. You watch – you wait… Things still happen here and something is waiting to happen to me. I can tell. Recently my life feels like a bloodcurdling joke. Recently my life has taken on *form* Something is waiting. I am waiting. Soon, it will stop waiting – any day now. Awful things can happen any time. This is the awful thing.
I mean, everyone has to calm down sometime. I'll still smoke up and party, but yeah, eventually you gotta settle down and be an adult. But still have fun. Demi's helped me sort of like, understand that down the road it'll just happen.
I am a positive person. I am not cynical. If you are born in this world, no matter who you are, negative things will happen. If you aren't positive as a person, you'll be very unhappy. It's extremely important to be positive, to laugh, to be happy, to accept life as it comes.
Music is a huge part of my life when I am on the road, working out, or preparing for a game. It is something I always go back to, and it is something that motivates me. It gets me hype before a game.
The pictures we saw before we got down here didn't even touch the reality of what it is like being here. We can be right on the beach with all the devastation and still not be able to imagine what it was like when the wall of water actually came up.
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