A Quote by Shirley Ballas
I just remember one girl really getting me on the field and beating the holy crap out of me. I never to this day know why. And then people used to be funny because we were on welfare. People used to make fun of you. But I used to get school dinners so I thought it was great, I got a hot meal every day.
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Back in the day, I used to get really upset when people used to say that I didn't really make all my own things - like my art or my videos or whatever. I work really hard on everything, so it used to upset me when people would try to discredit me or say that I wouldn't have what I had without this person or that person.
I used to have these frown lines on my forehead and thanks to them, people thought that I was the serious sorts. I used to host a chat show then and it used to look really bad. And so I got botox done and it worked for me.
If you get it out into the urban field it's going to be used or misused but it'll also probably provide a way of people acknowledging what the aesthetic is about because people have to confront it every day.
There is such a problem with racism, so to actually just say it and have so many people of colour message me and thank me for saying something... I remember when I used to cry about it to my manager I used to be like: 'Why do I feel like this?' and she'd never say it, and I'd never say it. It was really strange.
I wasn't into anything at school. I used to get really embarrassed. I used to get asked to do performing things, and I'd go to all the rehearsals, and then I'd pretend to be ill on the day I had to actually perform. I was very unhappy at school.
I was so unsuccessful for so long. I was used to the word no. I was used to you're not good enough or not quite there or you need to fix this about you. So I am honestly walking in faith every single day that I am going to be able to handle whatever God has for me. I am not used to being in a place where people appreciate my work and understand my work and want to be a part of my work and getting something out of my work because for so long it was so misunderstood. The success part for me is the hardest part and everyday I'm still battling.
I went to school in drag, in art school and my day was completely different because everybody thought I was a chick. You should see me as a chick. So I went as a girl, as like an experiment and it worked really well and everyone was really nice to me but I couldn't talk obviously... you know train conductors were really cool to me on my commute... HA! I looked hot as a chick!
I used to hate swimming at school so much that I would always sneak downstairs in the middle of the night and take my swimming costume out of my gym bag and hide it in the house somewhere. Then I'd never have to go swimming at school. This went on for months and I never got caught and my Mum turned into a nervous wreck because the thought she was losing her memory... and then one day she caught me and got super angry. That was kind of bad.
To me, acting used to be just, 'Get my face out there, get girls, make a little bit of money, make my mom proud.' It was just like sports. But there were moments in 'Moonlight' that I really felt like I had to know why he is the way he is. Or just people in general - why this person walks around with a frown on their face instead of a smile.
I used to play rugby, polo, tennis, and cricket in school. It was only in the 1990s, when I used to live just opposite Harrods in London, that I started putting on weight. I used to have my breakfast there every day.
I think, with age, you learn that it comes in bursts and you've got no control over it. I'm not one of those people who says, 'I've got to write a song every day.' I just store up ideas, and really I have to wait until it finds me; I know when I'm ready to write. It used to frustrate me, but it doesn't any more. It's just how it is.
My school friends are really understanding and still want to hang out with me. Ever since I was in sixth grade, I was at the gym every day to work out while my friends were getting their nails done or going to the mall. I used to feel left out, but I don't anymore.
I know my own truth. I'm in a great relationship with a woman. Maybe before it used to bother me. Then I was like, ‘This is so stupid that this bothers me. Some of my best friends in the world are gay, and if this is bothering me, then that means I have an issue with that.’ Once I figured that out for myself, I thought, ‘I don't care what anyone thinks about me.’ That's why I think I've become an ally for the gay and lesbian community. I just got [an Ally for Equality Award] the other day in Atlanta. I've very proud of my role in the community. So say what you will.
If I'd grown up in Atlanta and then gone to Ottumwa, Iowa it may have been culture shock, but I was used to being in a small town and used to seeing the same people all the time and going to the same grocery store every day, so it wasn't that big of a deal for me. I was just excited to be on TV. I was just jumping for joy when I got there. I wasn't making any money, but I was sure happy.
I know I'm no glamour girl, and it's not easy for me to get up in front of a crowd of people. It used to bother me a lot, but now I've got it figured out that God gave me this talent to use, so I just stand there and sing.
I'm not a big pet fan. I remember the school used to have a hamster, and you used to take it home for a week at a time. I did that. I probably got bored of it within a day.
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