A Quote by Stephen Colbert
When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no matter what happened Tuesday.
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Here's how it works: the president makes decisions. He's the decider. The press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down. Make, announce, type. Just put 'em through a spell check and go home. The greatest thing about this man is he's steady. You know where he stands. He believes the same thing Wednesday that he believed on Monday, no matter what happened Tuesday. Events can change; this man's beliefs never will.
We need steady hands, not a president who says he's neutral on Monday, pro-Israel on Tuesday, and who knows what on Wednesday, because everything's negotiable.
The Tuesday scowls, the Wednesday growls, the Thursday curses, the Friday howls, the Saturday snores, the Sunday yawns, the Monday morns, the Monday morns. The whacks, the moans, the cracks, the groans, the welts, the squeaks, the belts, the shrieks, the pricks, the prayers, the kicks, the tears, the skelps, and the yelps.
I work during the days and have night classes on Wednesday and Thursday and live with my partner, who is in school during the days and works Wednesday through Saturday nights. Monday and Tuesday are therefore our nights, and we both get our work out of the way so we can actually spend time together.
Some days I have off like Thursday and Sunday but typically Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday are dedicated to training if I'm in fight camp.
I've heard of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. But I've never heard of Someday.
I went out there for a thousand a week, and I worked Monday, and I got fired Wednesday. The guy that hired me was out of town Tuesday.
The modern physicist is a quantum theorist on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and a student of gravitational relativity on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. On Sunday, he is praying... that someone will find the reconciliation between the two views.
There's a different feeling when you show up and you're defending. You can't wait to get out there. You're not anxious that Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday would be over, but you're just excited to get that ball in the air on Thursday.
God runs electromagnetics by wave theory on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and the Devil runs them by quantum theory on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.
I'm going to always bleed the red, white, and blue. I represented the U.S. in the Olympics; I love my country. But the U.S. fans will love you on Monday; if you lose, they'll hate you on Tuesday. If you win, it will be back to loving you on Wednesday.
Many years ago in a period commonly know as Next Friday Afternoon, there lived a King who was very Gloomy on Tuesday mornings because he was so Sad thinking about how Unhappy he had been on Monday and how completely Mournful he would be on Wednesday.
I want to be in the booth any day - Sunday, Monday, Wednesday - it doesn't matter to me. I'm hooked. I love it.
The director took my face in his hands and asked me to show him my teeth, as with a horse. This happened on a Wednesday, and by the following Monday I was shooting.
My innovation message, specifically including energy, happened to be the same week that on Monday and Tuesday I announced the Breakthrough Energy Venture Group. Then on that Tuesday afternoon, in December, was when I sat down with him. I explained the US has great science here, this is where the market for these things is going to be. It connects to less pollution, it connects to U.S. jobs, it connects to security, not needing the energy coming from far away.
I refuse, whenever possible, to do shows on a Monday. I don't do gigs on a Monday, because nobody laughs on Mondays. Everybody wants Monday to be over. I just won't do 'em. But the rest of the time, in all honesty, it doesn't matter where you are: if something's funny, people laugh.
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