A Quote by Stephen Fry

Hold the newsreader's nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers.

Stephen Fry

Quote Topics

Friendly Hold Milk Nose Trousers Waiter Will

Quote Author

Stephen Fry
British - Comedian
Born: August 24, 1957

When somebody is a little bit wrong - say, when a waited puts nonfat milk in your espresso macchiato, instead of lowfat milk - it is often quite easy to explain to them how and why they are wrong. But if somebody is surprisingly wrong - say, when a waiter bites your nose instead of taking your order - you can often be so surprised that you are unable to say anything at all. Paralyzed by how wrong the waiter is, your moth would hang slightly open and your eyes would blink over and over, but you would be unable to say a word.

Daniel Handler

If you're a waiter, the worst thing you can do is go to work resenting your job. This will sound trite - but it's the reality, and part of my personality - yet when I was a waiter, I tried to be the best waiter, and when I was a bingo-caller I tried to be the best bingo-caller.

Russell Crowe

I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.'

Phyllis Diller

The human body has no more need for cows' milk than it does for dogs' milk, horses' milk, or giraffes' milk.

Michael Klaper

I love milk so much! I make a point of drinking a glass of milk every day. So now anyone who did those milk ads with the milk mustaches, they're my heroes.

Natalie Portman

Cows' milk and soya milk isn't good for me. Almond milk and rice milk is OK. I don't really drink alcohol, either. Maybe wine but only sometimes.

Robert Lewandowski

Talk is a pure art. Its only limits are the patience of listeners who, when they get tired, can always pay for their coffee or change it with a friendly waiter and walk out.

John Dos Passos

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

Woody Allen

Expect trouble as an inevitable part of life and when it comes, hold your head high, look it squarely in the eye and say “I will be bigger than you. You cannot defeat me.” Then repeat to yourself the most comforting of all words , “This too shall pass.”

Ann Landers

Be friendly first. Service starts with a friendly person with a friendly smile, who offers friendly words first. How friendly are you?

Jeffrey Gitomer

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

Steven Wright

When you find a waiter who is a waiter and not an actor, writer, musician or poet, you've found a jewel.

Andre Soltner

When I was a waiter, I wanted to be the best waiter I could be and worked to be better at it every day.

Robert Herjavec

When I was a waiter I was fired twice from the same restaurant. I guess I was that good of an actor but that bad of a waiter.

Nathan Fillion

Goat's milk is the closest thing out there to human breast milk. Plus, it is more easily digested than cow's or soy milk. Giving goat's milk to children is popular in Europe and other parts of the world.