A Quote by Steven Wright
I tried to hang myself with a bungee cord. I kept almost dying.
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Hearing people clapping draws you in pretty quick. It's like bungee cord jumping - it's a rush; you just want to do it again.
The Golden Gate Bridge should have a long bungee cord for people who aren't quite ready to commit suicide but want to get in a little practice.
I might have tried bungee jumping, until I saw that video of that guy whose cord came untied. He didn't know it 'till he hit the ground. Oh, he flew off that tower, hollering at his buddies. "Whoo, check me out, dudes! Oh, that ground is coming up..." WHAM! And what do you say, if you're the operator of that ride, to the next guy in line? "All right dude, you're up."
I have a lot of brothers. It's easy for me to do physical stuff. I had to survive. I really love it, and I'd love to do more of it. I want to do action films. I want to go and hang off of wires, and jump off of bridges, and hang on bungee cords. I've always really loved it.
I'm so fat and I'm so depressed; last night I tried to hang myself - but the rope broke.
I had no clue what I wanted to do. I tried nursing, I tried science, I tried English. I just kept bouncing back and forth.
What excites me is danger! I like to do daring things. I've bungee jumped three times. The only thing I haven't tried is skydiving.
It's been a full week since she left and all you've done is sulk like a dying cow"(Kish) Dying cows don't sulk." (sin) How do you know? Do you make it a habit to hang around dying cows?" (Kish)
And Levin, a happy father and a man in perfect health, was several times so near suicide that he hid the cord, lest he be tempted to hang himself, and was afraid to go out with his gun, for fear of shooting himself. But Levin did not shoot himself, and did not hang himself; he went on living.
When I got done at Duke, I almost felt ashamed of it. I almost tried to distance myself from being the Duke guy.
The first guitar I ever had was a gut-string Spanish guitar, and I couldn't really get the hang of it. I was only 13, and I talked my grandparents into buying it for me. I tried and tried and tried, but got nowhere with it.
Sometimes I use a bungee, one of those bungee cords that offer resistance training. I find that useful. Like, I'll go out and hit a backhand or a forehand with resistance. Because when you get rid of the resistance, you've recruited more muscle fibers, and it definitely helps with speed.
In my twenties I tried cocaine, which I instantly loved but eventually hated. Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don't know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It's bad for almost everything else.
But what if it were you? What if you were stuffed in a human body and let loose on this planet only to find yourself lost among your own kind? What if you were such a good person that you tried to save the life that you'd taken that you almost died trying to get her back to her family? What if you then found yourself surrounded by violent aliens who hated you and tried to hurt you and tried to murder you over and over again? What if you just kept doing whatever you could to save and heal people despite that? Wouldn't you deserve a life too? Wouldn't you have earned that much?
I tried to keep myself away from him by using con words like "fidelity" and "adultery", by telling myself that he would interfere with my work, that I had him I'd be too happy to write. I tried to tell myself I was hurting Bennett, hurting myself, making a spectacle of myself. I was. But nothing helped. I was possessed. The minute he walked into a room and smiled at me, I was a goner.
I tried to tell myself that it could be worse, that the world was not a wish-granting factory, that I was living with cancer not dying of it, that I mustn't let it kill me before it kills me.
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