A Quote by Steven Wright

I couldn't find the remote control to the remote control.

Steven Wright

Quote Topics

Control Find Remote Remote Control

Quote Author

Steven Wright
American - Comedian
Born: December 6, 1955

It gets harder and harder to succeed and find audiences with the 500-channel universe, the remote control, and people being so trigger happy with that remote control. It just gets harder to get a foothold.

David E. Kelley

9% would give up sex for the remote control. 91% has already given up sex for the remote control!

Jay Leno

It's so hard to go to war at home. Go to war, go home, repeat. And that is the future of warfare. Forget about remote control drones, there's going to be remote control tanks.

Andrew Niccol

AT&T is now offering a new service that allows you to pay your bills through your TV screen by using your remote control. So instead of saying, "The check's in the mail," people are going to say, "Hey, I wanted to pay, but I couldn't find the remote."

Jay Leno

In the past, I've visited remote places - North Korea, Ethiopia, Easter Island - partly as a way to visit remote states of mind: remote parts of myself that I wouldn't ordinarily explore.

Pico Iyer

In the past, Ive visited remote places - North Korea, Ethiopia, Easter Island - partly as a way to visit remote states of mind: remote parts of myself that I wouldnt ordinarily explore.

Pico Iyer

My grandparents lived with us. And I remember watching 'Doctor Who' with my granddad on his new telly. These were the days before remote controls but my granddad, being quite a resourceful sort of chap, had fashioned his own remote control - which was a length of bamboo pole with a bit of cork that he'd glued on the end.

Bill Bailey

A new survey reveals that women would rather give up sex than give up the remote control for the TV. Men, on the other hand, would be willing to have sex with the remote for the TV.

Conan O'Brien

Unfortunately, real life doesn't have a remote control.

Simone Elkeles

I like being in charge of the remote control.

Cilla Black

This is not a business where you can hand off and run by remote control.

David Neeleman

Even in a remote monastery, you may still be remote from the truth! To find the truth, all you need is a sound way of thinking.

Mehmet Murat Ildan

A small handgun makes any TV remote control.

David Letterman

You ever look for the remote control, but you can't find it, so you just decide, "Ah, guess I'm not watching TV. I'm not gonna take two steps and turn it on myself. I'll go to the gym if I'm going to work out."