A Quote by Troye Sivan
I think I realize now I was really, really scared to express myself through fashion or certain music or certain TV shows. I was petrified that anyone would ever think I was gay god forbid, and so, once I got over that I kind of could just let myself be.
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But when there were certain moments or scenes that required a very specific nuance or performance, I myself would act out the scene or the sequence and that would inspire the actors. Of course, I can't really express emotions on camera, but I was very active in showing a certain action or a blocking for an actor. I would also participate in certain stunts myself and because of that, I would get bruises or cuts on my knees and elbows.
I admired fashion but I wasn't an "iconic fashionista" myself. I think as I got more comfortable in my skin, then I got a little bit more into fashion, but it's always been something I've been interested in because you can express yourself through what you wear and your accessories and everything else. So getting into my early 20s was really started to come into myself.
I think I have a certain kind of style. I think at the same time, I'm aware that there's certain things that I did as a playwright in certain plays, and I try not to repeat myself, even though I have a certain kind of sensibility, and I tend to gravitate toward certain things.
I think after time goes by and you earn certain rights or you break through certain barriers, you could sometimes, maybe, take it for granted what you have now that you didn't have before. And then that would lead to a certain lack of community, in a way, caring in a way, that I saw before [in gay society].
I mean, a lot of people don't realize it, but fashion is one of the most racial industries left out there now. Radio and music aren't. Television and movies aren't. Even commercials now are showing interracial couples. You see a lot of diversity in TV shows, but you don't see that in fashion. You think there would be some, because the consumer is of all colors and all shades. But you don't see that in fashion.
I'll be 40 this year, so 'Can We Talk' is really not me anymore. Now I have the freedom to express myself through my music and write about my likes, my dislikes, and my passions. There's no greater feeling than being able to express myself.
I don't look at certain things on TV anymore. I don't listen to certain music anymore. I make sure my kids don't listen to it. It's funny because back in the days I could look at comedy shows and all kind of stuff and you didn't even realize how much cursing it had in it.
I feel really blessed that I found what I love doing and was able to make it a living from such a young age. I realize that I'm really fortunate. I didn't train; I kind of got lucky. And I remember that every day. I think I have to remind myself of that to really, fully appreciate life now.
I think I did realize that early on, and then I went through a fun phase where I was figuring out who I was and the different sides of myself. I think like most women, I bought into a certain ideal of beauty that I didn't quite fit into, and I tried to pretzel myself and alter myself to be what I was told is beautiful, and then I realized that you are in control of what you think is beautiful.
I love art, but I don't think I'm especially good at it. Fashion I think I could imagine, but I'm not really sure. I think it's easiest for me to picture myself in music.
I've been doing four-track songs by myself since I was like a teenager, where I'd sing in a way that I ... I just didn't think other people would like it, so I didn't play it for them but eventually I got over that, which I'm happy that I did, because it's kind of a drag to be playing a kind of music that you don't really like as much as another kind.
When I remember how unhappy I was in adolescence - about the fact that, though I wasn't really using the term to or for myself, I knew that I was gay - I think, "Oh, if someone then could have shown me just an hour in the life that I have now, I would have made it through all of that misery and despair just fine." The pain lay in thinking that I had a desolate future.
I would say I like expressing myself in different ways. The way I can express myself in songs is awesome. What you can express through acting is cool too. I just want to let it all out. I like them both for different reasons, though. Music has a freedom that acting doesn't really have, and acting presents a challenge that music necessarily doesn't.
I started super young, but when I think about myself at that age - what I thought I knew, and how priggish I was, how certain of things - now I realize that nothing is certain.
As soon as I sat down to write music, really, with Café Blue. I just can't think about that when I sit down to write. I don't let myself. I actually don't allow myself to look at sales figures. Ever. I get the general impression that I'm not selling like Norah Jones, but I don't really pay too much attention, because I think it would corrupt me.
I play piano and guitar and I do write my own stuff so to a certain extent I know what I want to do in regards to music. But I'm still finding out what kind of music is my favourite kind to listen to, never mind do myself so I've got a lot of time to find out myself and develop myself as an artist.
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