A Quote by Vanessa Bayer
It's like, backstage at 'SNL,' like, if you come back after a show or something, or a lot of times even at the after-parties, we're just pretty tired and like, 'Hey, what's up.' Just getting a drink and kind of chilling out. Nothing crazy.
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I got so many people that have my number. It's crazy. I just don't feel like texting anybody back after I get, like, 30 text messages in three hours. I just be chilling.
At first, after my freshman year, it was kind of a joke, going into my sophomore year like, 'Hey, I wanna graduate in three years, two-and-a-half.' And we were just kind of playing with it, added some extra classes in, and then once I finished that following spring going into that next summer, it was just like, 'Hey, I can actually do it.'
Honestly, I always told my coaches my whole career - we'll practice two-minute drills in practice, like, once a week and everything - I'm just like, 'Those are my favorite time of football.' I'm out there in total control, just getting everything lined up, getting everybody on the same page, and obviously, usually it's pass after pass after pass.
I don't really like to drink. I don't like the way alcohol feels or tastes. On occasion I'll do it as a social thing, just to kind of go, 'Hey! I did something with you guys!'
Standing here, in this quiet house where I can hear the birds chirping out back, I think I’m kind of getting the concept of closure. It’s no big dramatic before-after. It’s more like that melancholy feeling you get at the end of a really good vacation. Something special is ending, and you’re sad, but you can’t be that sad because, hey, it was good while it lasted, and there’ll be other vacations, other good times.
I think about nothing but business the whole time. Even when I go out to my after-parties, people are like, 'You're drinking water?' I'm like, 'Yeah I am.'
I'm pretty sure my audience could be bigger, if I could get it out a lot more different places, but that's what we're working towards right now today. It ain't like I'm at the end of our career or nothing like that, I just now getting started. I been in the game for a long time but I'm just now getting heard by people everywhere else. And they still seem to like it, so it didn't give me nothing but fuel, and motivation to keep it pushing.
'SNL' after-parties are sort of like a time to celebrate your successes and drown your sorrows, depending on how the show went for you.
I had one job that was kind of cop-like. One summer I did security at a miniature golf course. Just standing out in the sun all day, Hey, hey, excuse me sir. Get your putter out of the whale's ass. Come on, this is a place of miniature business. This is not a playground even though it looks like a playground.
I have this problem where I get incredibly, miserably nervous every single show. This is part of why touring is so exhausting for me. I have not gotten to a place where it's like, "All right, here's another." It just doesn't feel workaday, at all, yet. It's kind of killing me, being so nervous so many hours of the day. After the show - we try to end on an anthemic note, and I try and let that be decisive, and I will often come back out for an encore a cappella, and that's where I try and take leave from the feelings of the stage. Trying, after I do that, to return to my life.
I really love doing nothing. I really love just being at home and taking a couple of days, you know, doing nothing. You know what I mean? Just getting up, being around the house, going outside the back yard, coming back in; I really like to do nothing because I travel a lot. There's a lot of travelling. There's a lot of on the phone all the time. There's a lot of looking at papers and reading things and so you don't want to read magazines and you don't want to do anything; you don't want to read books, you just want to just kind of shut down a little bit.
I remember Robert Plant coming backstage after the first show saying, 'Hey, boys, I should be opening for you.' That felt pretty good.
A lot of times, people will have after-parties or try and host an event for comedians, and they misunderstand us. They think it should be wild and crazy, or loud music, and comedians are typically pretty mellow people that just want to talk to each other.
I like to just hang out. My friends dont like to do that, but I do. Because, a lot of times Im busy, and I just kind of like to get a chance to just hang out.
I do remember, one time, a man came to me after the students began to work in Mississippi and he said the white people were getting tired and they were getting tense and anything might happen. Well, I asked him "how long he thinks we had been getting tired"? I have been tired for 46 years and my parents was tired before me and their parents were tired, and I have always wanted to do something that would help some of the things I would see going on among Negroes that I didn't like and I don't like now.
Honestly, I try to forget Fashion Week once it's over. I just want to go home and rest and just forget I even did it. It could drive you crazy! It's just show after show after show, and you're missing your family and they feel really far away. You don't go to sleep. You work for a month.
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