Top 34 Quotes & Sayings by Kathy Lette

In Hollywood a romantic man is one who talks to you after sex.

Love is like a tide. When it's in, everything looks beautiful and inviting. Only when love recedes can you see the debris beneath the surface - the old bottles, the rusty prams, the sewage pipes, the bloated cats and dogs weighted down to drown. The man I had once loved so passionately I now saw as weak, gutted like a fish.

My sisters and I miss our dad dreadfully. But grief, of course, is the price of love.

living with a teenage daughter is like living with the Taliban a mum is not allowed to laugh, sing, dance or wear short skirts

Good art is in the wallet of the beholder.

If God hadn't meant us to hunt men, he wouldn't have given us Wonder Bras.

Believe me, having a teenage daughter is like living with the Taliban.

Why can't women tell jokes? Because we marry them!

The truth is, my experience in matters sexual is limited.

Women want to be treated as equals, not sequels.

Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman.

Anyone living in Los Angeles who says they don't need a psychiatrist, needs a psychiatrist.

It's a mystery of parenthood that your son can give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to a stray, worm-riddled dog, share a piece of re-chewed gum from a kid with bronchitis and pick his nose and eat it on a regular basis, yet won't sit next to his sister because of 'Girl Germs'.

Well if manners maketh man make-up maketh woman.And we don't need a phalanx of behavioural scientists to explain why man judge women by their looks.Because the see bether than thay think.

The name Kylie can be used for Scrabble, as it is an aboriginal word for boomerang. Which is why Ms Minogue is so good at comebacks.

If he wants breakfast in bed, tell him to sleep in the kitchen.

dealing with loss and heartache doesn't make you stronger. It only makes people think you are.

Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract.

Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of.

People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.

As a breastfeeding mother you are basically just meals on heels.

Teenagers are obviously God's punishment for having sex in the first place.

Every woman wants to be wanted - just not by the entire Metropolitan police force.

Home is where the heartache is.

Basically it's just a whole bunch of blokes standing around scratching themselves

. . . planning a brilliant menu and preparing it beautifully doesn't guarantee a recipe for success.

I am allergic to domestic goddesses. Men would prefer a woman with a dirty mind to a clean house.

All men are into bondage, 'specially if they're real assholes at work all day.

Age to women is what kryptonite is to Superman. Inside every older woman is a younger woman screaming, 'Get me the hell outta here.'

Any woman who calls herself a post-feminist should keep her Wonderbra and burn her brains.

I speak as your native guide to the mysterious tribe called the English. Dress code is everything. You can be a card-carrying Nazi, you can pay gigolos to eat gnocchi out of your navel and you won't be pilloried -- as long as you never, ever wear linen with tweed.

I knew absolutely nothing about bondage. I'd always presumed it was just an inventive way of keeping your partner from going home.

If the Nobel Prize was awarded by a woman, it would go to the inventor of the dimmer switch.

What creates a writer is huge, psychological dysfunction.