A Quote by Jimmy Fallon

Officials at the London Olympics will be conducting 5,000 tests for steroids. Or as Lance Armstrong calls that, 'a Monday.' — © Jimmy Fallon
Officials at the London Olympics will be conducting 5,000 tests for steroids. Or as Lance Armstrong calls that, 'a Monday.'
Lance Armstrong has a 17th-century, 15-foot Spanish fresco of the crucifixion hanging on the wall of his Austin mansion. This doesn't mean - and some of you Armstrong acolytes might want to sit down for this - that Lance is Jesus.
From my conversations with Lance Armstrong and experiences with Lance and the team I am aware that Lance used blood transfusions from 2001 through 2005.
It's funny because when there's something written about me in Velonews or Cyclingnews, the headline isn't "the other" Armstrong; its Armstrong wins another race. With Lance in retirement, everyone I know goes to those sites because they think Lance is racing again.
According to the New York Post, Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olsen are dating. They must be getting serious - Lance gave Ashley his yellow Live Strong bracelet. She wears it as a belt.
You see that in the news constantly; done both the right way and the wrong way. The most recent example I can think of, obviously, is Lance Armstrong, who got it all wrong. Who wanted to apologize strategically, instead of abjectly. What got me interested was the repetitive nature of it. There's something so ritualized about it. Then the ritual needs to be reenacted very carefully and pretty frequently - Tiger Woods, and now Manti Te'o and Lance Armstrong, and a little earlier Anthony Weiner or Eliot Spitzer.
I was a huge fan of Lance Armstrong. The only way that they caught him using doping was through a criminal investigation where they got all of his teammates who did the exact same thing that he did and got away with it to rat him out in exchange for their own immunity. The byproduct of that was that he had passed 500 anti-doping controls clean. So I'm going, "Wait, wait, wait. It's not, 'What's wrong with Lance Armstrong?' What's wrong with this system that was thoroughly ineffective to catch someone cheating for the last 15 years?"
Lance Armstrong has no place in cycling.
The safety argument against steroids may be a good one, but let's be honest. It isn't the one that motivates most officials and fans to frown on steroids. Steroid use does not just seem risky or unnatural, it seems to disrupt the level playing field.
Lance Armstrong deserves to be forgotten in cycling
I was treated with a miracle drug, just like Lance Armstrong.
Lance Armstrong did a number of things, and he gave himself cancer.
Lance Armstrong pushes the envelope in terms of the human experience. You can have a personal best, you can push your own envelope. For Lance, the person pushing him is him. The only person he's competing with, I think, is himself. To push that limit to the next step. There's a lot to learn from him. Lots.
No athlete entered 2012 with more and left it with less than Lance Armstrong.
In a nation committed to better living through chemistry - where Viagra-enabled men pursue silicone-contoured women - the national pastime has a problem of illicit chemical enhancement. Steroids threaten the health of the 5 percent to 7 percent of players proved, by a mild regime of scheduled tests, to be using them. Steroids also endanger emulative young people. Further, steroids subvert what baseball is selling - fair competition. And they strike at the pleasure of engagement with America's team sport with the longest history.
I realized I was never going to be Lance Armstrong. And in biking, if you want to make money, you have to be the best.
I was a fan of Lance Armstrong, and I remember watching him win the Worlds in '93 in Oslo.
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