A Quote by John Malkovich
It's not a gift of mine, but one given to me, to be able to criticise myself and not be crushed, by myself or by others.
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Learning to love others begins with learning to love ourselves unconditionally first. I will never let myself down, treat myself like a doormat, or make myself small so others can feel big. I have learned that this is the biggest gift that I give not only to myself, but also to the planet, because I paint others with the same brush as I use on myself.
As a human, I am flawed in that it is difficult for me to consider others before myself. It feels like I have to fight against this force, this current within me that, more often than not, wants to avoid serious issues and please myself, buy things for myself, feed myself, entertain myself, and all of that.
The world always looks straights ahead; as for me, I turn my gaze inward, I fix it there and keep it busy. Everyone looks in front of him: as for me, I look inside me: I have no business but with myself; I continually observe myself, I take stock of myself, I taste myself. Others...they always go forward; as for me, I roll about in myself.
I think I have a gift... but I haven't really opened that gift yet and given it to myself.
I think I have a gift, but I haven't really opened that gift yet and given it to myself.
No one has taken my heart in their hand. I haven't given it... I have lent myself, rented myself out, but never given myself.
When I am watching my films, I think I could have done this scene better and I tend to criticise myself. I have liked myself in bits and parts.
I can't be found in myself; I discover myself in others. That much is clear. And I suspect that I also love and care for myself in others.
One thing you gotta know about Roy. The way I always saw myself, is I'm just like you. In the ring, I have a gift...That gift ain't on the basketball court. That gift ain't at home. You understand me? That gift is in the ring.
My experience is that I find myself having to constantly define myself to others, day-in, day-out. The quote that's helped me the most through that is from Toni Morrison's "Beloved" where she says, "Definitions belong to the definers, not the defined" - so I find myself defining myself for other people lest I be defined by others and stuck into some box where I don't particularly belong.
It wasn't until my late twenties that I learned that by working out I had given myself a great gift. I learned that nothing good comes without work and a certain amount of pain. When I finish a set that leaves me shaking, I know more about myself. When something gets bad, I know it can't be as bad as that workout.
Making promises to myself, in my personal writing practice, has been important to me all my life. In practical application it is so much easier for me to make promises to others, and keep them, than it is to make promises to myself. "Why is that?" and the answer I gave myself is that in making promises to others I create a model of accountability and reinforcement. I duplicate that in my writing and have grown increasingly better at making and keeping promises to myself.
I consider myself a songwriter before anything else. The fact that I have been able to write both of my records and establishing myself as a songwriter is super-important to me. Some people have that gift, where they can take on anything and make people believe it. I like to do a song from personal experience.
Love is when I smile and breathe deeply down to my toes. I've given myself a gift of caring for myself and learned a new way to look at my issues. And I'm lying in some fresh sheets looking out the window at some visual beauty... a mountain, an ocean, a stream, a forest. A lovely man lying next to me or my babies sleeping.
I was constantly comparing myself to others in my workplace, others in life, others on social media, and I was so focused on others that I fell out of touch with myself.
I was blessed with a sense of my own destiny. I have never sold myself short. I have never judged myself by other people's standards. I have always expected a great deal of myself, and if I fail, I fail myself. So failure or reversal does not bring out resentment in me because I cannot blame others for any misfortune that befalls me.
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