A Quote by Jon Stewart

Making it [St. Patrick's Day] a great day for the Irish, but just an ok day if you're looking for a quiet tavern to talk, read or have a white wine spritzer.

Jon Stewart

Quote Topics

Day Great Great Day Irish Just Looking Making OK Quiet Read Talk Tavern White White Wine Wine

Quote Author

Jon Stewart
American - Entertainer
Born: November 28, 1962

I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day.

Tamara Tunie

On this day, millions of people...throughout the world will gather to commemorate the life of Patrick, patron saint of Ireland. From his days as a slave in Ireland to his work as missionary years later, St. Patrick demonstrated a courage, commitment, and faith that won the hearts and minds of the Irish people. St. Patrick's Day also serves as a time for people of Irish descent from all traditions and religions to honor their native land and shared heritage. Their devotion to family, faith, and community has strengthened our country's character.

George W. Bush

I'm Irish and I was born on St. Patrick's Day. I'm lucky sevens.

Billy Corgan

Roughly 1 in 6 Americans have Irish blood. I'd say it's probably safe to assume that the average Irish-American who only comes out on St. Patrick's Day has no idea of the sort of economic powerhouse Ireland has become.

Scott McClellan

St. Patrick's Day is a holy day for Roman Catholics in Ireland to pray and a day for drunk people to vomit with their pants down in New Jersey.

Margot Leitman

St.Patrick's Day is named for St. Patrick, the first guy to feed Guinness to a snake.

Conan O'Brien

It's such a shame, really, because we were known for our country of saints and scholars, and we grew up with such a great tradition with St. Patrick, and he is the one who brought Christianity to Ireland, and we celebrate St. Patrick's day every single year, but there's very few practising Catholics or practising Christians.

Katie Taylor

They say there are only two kinds of people on St. Patrick's Day: the Irish, and the people that drive them home.

Conan O'Brien

St. Patrick... one of the few saints whose feast day presents the opportunity to get determinedly whacked and make a fool of oneself all under the guise of acting Irish.

Charles Madigan

I went to a Catholic University and there's something about being a Catholic-American. You know, St. Patrick's Day is, I'm Irish-Catholic. There's alcoholism in my family. It's like I've got to be Catholic, right?

Jim Gaffigan

The prime minister of Ireland will be celebrating St. Patrick's Day at the White House. So finally the Secret Service agents will have a drinking buddy.

Conan O'Brien

We've got wars. Imagine having more money, you could buy more beer. Have you been to Dublin in its heyday like in the boom heyday at like 4:00 in the morning on a Sunday or Saturday? It's like beyond New Orleans. It's like St. Patrick's Day every day. It's not good. I don't even like pubs anymore. I like going for a meal and having a bottle of wine. Be more gentle.

Gavin Friday

My parents are both from Belfast. I have an Irish passport and a British passport, and I go back every summer and every Christmas, and sometimes I pop over during the year to say hi, and, of course, celebrate St. Patrick's Day.

Stella Maxwell

St. Patrick's Day is the fourth biggest drinking day in America. It's not the biggest. It's right behind New Year's Eve, Fourth of July, or any Secret Service party.

David Letterman

I just want to remind everybody that it's Columbus Day. That all those of you that know Italians and like Italians are the people that might venture on to a ship and travel to explore and find new lands, this is your day. It's not St. Patty's Day. That's a different day entirely.