A Quote by Kathy Griffin

I have a no-apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I'm on stage, I'm at a microphone it's a joke!

Kathy Griffin

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Apologize Apology Constantly I Apologize I Make Mistakes Joke Jokes Life Make Microphone Mistakes Policy Real Real Life Ridiculous Ridiculous Things Say Stage Things Time

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Kathy Griffin
American - Comedian
Born: November 4, 1961

Kathy Griffin

I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I'm on stage, I'm at a microphone... it's a joke!

Kathy Griffin

We live in an age of apologies. Apologies, fake or true, are expected from the descendants of empire builders, slave owners and persecutors of heretics, and from men who -in our eyes- just got it all wrong. So, with the age of 85 coming up shortly, I want to make an apology. It appears I must apologize for being male, white, and European.

Alec Guinness

Now, I want to explain something to you guys. I don't have an ending joke, because I don't tell jokes. I tell real-life stories and make them funny. So, I'm not like the average comedian. They have an ending joke; they always holler Peace! I'm out of here, and walk off stage. So, basically, when I get through performing on stage, I just walk off.

Bruce Bruce

I am here today to again apologize for the personal mistakes I have made and the embarrassment I have caused. I make this apology to my neighbors and my constituents, but I make it particularly to my wife, Huma.

Anthony Weiner

If I have something to apologize, I want to be the first one to step up and make that apology. I don't want anyone to broker it for me. I don't want anyone to take the hit for me. If I have anything to apologize for, I'm only human. I'm prone to making mistakes.

Michelle Shocked

And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!

Will Rogers

I don't think I've ever died on stage. I've had jokes that died on stage. I've told a joke and absolutely nothing. They didn't know it was the end of the joke.

Billy Connolly

It's live television. People make mistakes and Steve Harvey was very gracious to apologize. I accept his apology and I think it speaks a lot about his character.

Pia Wurtzbach

To show that a comedian on stage in India talking about sanitation or in South Africa talking about HIV and AIDS awareness, if you follow the joke into their lives, you can see that, like, oh, these things aren't just contrived in joke books. This is real life. I think the best comedians have that bravery and courage to say, Oh, this is what it is.

Hasan Minhaj

When I'm writing columns, it's - all I'm thinking about is jokes, joke, joke, joke, setup, punch line, joke, joke, joke. And I really don't care where it goes.

Dave Barry

I did so many open mics. I would write jokes on Twitter constantly, and then slowly, over time, open mics turned into shows. If you can get a joke to work at an open mic, it's a good joke.

Michelle Wolf

Be willing to apologize. Proper apologies have three parts: 1) What I did was wrong. 2) I'm sorry that I hurt you. 3) How do I make it better? It's the third part that people tend to forget. Apologize when you screw up and focus on other people, not on yourself.

Randy Pausch

People would say, "Oh, you say you just do jokes." I don't just do jokes. I do jokes. Jokes are important. They saved my life when I was younger. Hopefully we're making things nicer at the end of the day for people. That's the entire goal, and that's the touchstone and the North Star for the tone.

Stephen Colbert

The measure of a man cannot be whether he ever makes mistakes, because he will make mistakes. It's what he does in response to his mistakes. The same is true of companies. We have to apologize, we have to fix the problem, and we have to learn from our mistakes.

Wil Shipley

I guess we didn't even officially apologize. Jesse Jackson called on the United States to officially apologize to the Chinese. Jesse said, 'An apology is not a sign of weakness.' And as President Clinton has taught us, an apology isn't even a sign you're sorry.

Jay Leno

A Quote by Kathy Griffin

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