A Quote by Mitch Hedberg

I had the cab driver drive me here backwards, and the dude owed me $27.50.

Mitch Hedberg

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Backwards Cab Drive Driver Dude Had Me Owed

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Mitch Hedberg
American - Comedian
February 24, 1968 - March 30, 2005

You know, before I would think, my cab driver hates me. Now I think my limo driver hates me.

Ray Romano

New York has made me so paranoid, too. Whenever I visit another city, I always act like I'm from there, so the cab driver doesn't rip me off. I'm always like, "Yeah, it's good to be back home. Back here where I grew up. Yeah. Here in Tokyo. ... Uh, driver, I need to go to my old stomping grounds. That would be the Holiday Inn. And the address appears to be the pound sign."

Jim Gaffigan

Now this is over thirty years later and the guy said he was that cab driver. He apologized and he was serious. I felt awful. He might have been spending his whole life thinking he had jinxed me, but I told him he hadn't. My number was up.

Joe DiMaggio

Luckily when you drive a cab there are two things: You don't have a boss in the cab with you, and you are not facing the people that you are making money from.

Fran Lebowitz

I'll tell ya, I don't get no respect... The other day, I got back from a business trip. I got in a cab and said to the driver, "Hey! Take me to where the action is!" So ya know where he took me? He took me to my house!

Rodney Dangerfield

Sometimes I get frustrated in traffic. I typically start going deep with my cab driver and Twitter feed - simultaneously - to take my mind off the gridlock. I enjoy live-tweeting my cab rides.

Andy Cohen

I saw someone label me as a dubstep producer but I'm definitely not a dubstep producer. There's nothing wrong with that, though, because that's major. But it's like a school bus driver being labeled as a NASCAR driver. I would love to be a NASCAR driver, but I drive buses for a living.

AraabMuzik

I met Keith Haring at SVA college where he was having an art show, later we had a group art show at the Mud Club in NYC. Keith owed me $50, so he gave me a large framed canvas with barking dogs that had large dicks. I painted over Keith's painting to paint flowers for my mom's living room.

Steve Kaufman

Quentin [Tarantino] called me and said: "Yeah, you've got to be in my movie. You've got to be in Death Proof." But he made me audition. I was like: "Dude, I don't even want to do this..." So I left the casting of Hostel: Part II to drive to Venice, where Quentin was holding his casting, and the person ahead of me was Derek Richardson from Hostel 1 and he was like: "Dude, what are you doing here?" I said: "Don't ask!"

Eli Roth

Not only do I not drive, I don't have my driver's license; there's a story there, but the upshot is that I spent my high school years an ardent environmentalist and workout junkie who wanted to save the environment, burn calories, and have my boyfriends drive me around.

Rachel Sklar

I may drive in a few races next year if someone needs a substitute driver ... (but) if I were never to drive again, I have had a great career.

Ricky Rudd

I don't want to be Mr. Romantic Leading Man. I don't want to be the Dance Dude. I don't want to be the Action Guy. If I had to do any one of those all my life, it'd drive me crazy.

Patrick Swayze

In 1950, when the Giants signed me, they gave me $15,000. I bought a 1950 Mercury. I couldn't drive, but I had it in the parking lot there, and everybody that could drive would drive the car. So it was like a community thing

Willie Mays

I literally was saved by a role, from becoming a cab driver. I never did have to wait tables, though, so looking back I guess I had it pretty soft.

Sam Waterston

I remember my father, when I was a kid, retiring me on 50. He never used to let me bat past 50. He'd say I had to retire to give the other kids an opportunity.

Michael Clarke

A Quote by Mitch Hedberg

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