A Quote by Mitch Hedberg

I got some tartar control toothpaste. I still have tartar, but that stuff's under control. I got so much tartar, I don't have to dip my fish sticks in anything. That's actually kind of gross. After that joke, I have to clarify that I'm just joking.

Mitch Hedberg

Quote Topics

Actually After Anything Clarify Control Dip Fish Got Gross Joke Joking Just Kind Much Some Sticks Still Stuff Toothpaste

Quote Author

Mitch Hedberg
American - Comedian
February 24, 1968 - March 30, 2005

I got some tartar-control toothpaste a while back. I've still got tartar, but it's under control.

Mitch Hedberg

Confidence is going after Moby Dick in a rowboat and taking tartar sauce with you.

Zig Ziglar

I'm not a golf player. I think golf and fishing are the same, but at the end of the day, you can't fry up and golf ball and dip it in tartar sauce. So I'm a fisherman.

Daymond John

The old adage about giving a man a fish versus teaching him how to fish has been updated by a reader: Give a man a fish and he will ask for tartar sauce and French fries! Moreover, some politician who wants his vote will declare all these things to be among his 'basic rights.'

Thomas Sowell

I'm so optimistic, I'd go after Moby Dick in a rowboat and take the tartar sauce with me.

Zig Ziglar

When facing a difficult task, act as though it is impossible to fail. If you are going after Moby Dick, take along the tartar sauce.

H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

It freshens your breath and helps prevent tartar.

Mel Gibson

I grew up peeling shrimp and making tartar sauce.

Justin Lin

RUSSIAN, n. A person with a Caucasian body and a Mongolian soul. A Tartar Emetic.

Ambrose Bierce

My favorite restaurant in the Twin Cities is McDonalds. I order two cheeseburgers, two snack wraps with no sauce, two fish fillets with cheese and light tartar sauce, two large fries, two apple pies, and one large milkshake.

Michael Beasley

The mixture of Sarmatic and German blood had contributed to improve the features of the Alani, to whiten their swarthy complexions, and to tinge their hair with a yellowish cast, which is seldom found in the Tartar race.

Edward Gibbon

I with borrow'd silver shine, What you see is none of mine. First I show you but a quarter, Like the bow that guards the Tartar: Then the half, and then the whole, Ever dancing round the pole.

Jonathan Swift

You can't escape history, or the needs and neuroses you've picked up like layers and layers of tartar on your teeth.... Your every past action and thought have made you what you are.

Charles R. Johnson

I am in the theatrical profession myself, my wife is in the theatrical profession, my children are in the theatrical profession.I had a dog that lived and died in it from a puppy; and my chaise-pony goes on, in Timour the Tartar.

Charles Dickens

I still don't really know what my style is. I like a lot of different kinds of comedy, I like watching it and I like being inventive and original. That's the problem with doing a longer set - you can't do every joke that you have because some stuff contradicts other stuff. Even when you know that the audience knows that you're joking and it's not true, you still can't do a joke about your family dying and then later talk about your Mom. I mean you want to keep some kind of cohesive order going.

Bonnie McFarlane

Decades of futile effort have not dampened my bold aspirations to save the nation. Born in a late age, I have not been able to witness the golden rule of Yao and Shun and other sage emperors of ancient China. Instead, my heart grieves at the suffering of the Chinese people under the cruel exploitation of the Tartar Slaves.

Sun Yat-sen

A Quote by Mitch Hedberg

Quote Topics

Quote Author

Related Quotes

Related Authors