Top 1200 Inside Jokes Quotes & Sayings

All my life, my immediate response to emotional pain has been to make jokes. Lots of jokes.

There are jokes I know I want to tell, and there's sort of a rough order, but usually I try to change it up every show, to improvise and talk with the audience. I think when you tell jokes, if you're not careful, you can end up telling the whole list of jokes and then that's it. And that can get a little boring.

The audience loves when the comedian talks to them. You're creating inside jokes, which creates a community.

I don't take jokes from other people. It's really not cool to steal jokes from anybody. It's not cool to steal anything from anybody. Jokes are no different.

Jokes for jokes' sake are kind of meaningless to me. I understand the value of them, but it doesn't speak to me as much. You can lace your argument with jokes, but tell me why you're presenting this argument. What does it mean?

I use mother-in-law jokes, kid jokes, tax jokes - anything that works.

We don't write jokes or anything, the furthest we'll go is we'll repeat certain jokes for the camera.

I learned all those jokes in second grade. Second grade is really where they tell you those horrific jokes, racist jokes and misogynistic jokes that you have no idea what they mean, and you just memorize them because they have a very strong effect, they make people laugh in this kind of nervous, horrible way, and it's only later that you realize that you've got a head full of crap.

It’s just what they are — they’re jokes…most jokes are about Jewish people, rednecks, black folks…I can’t determine what offends another person.

People are writing shorter jokes. The style I've started with was almost trying to keep jokes under 140 characters before Twitter.

I'm not good with jokes, no. I don't know a joke at all. I like being told jokes, but I can't tell one myself.

I'm a taker in terms of jokes. I love to hear a good joke, but I don't retain jokes. I'm not a good teller of jokes.

I never used to tell jokes on stage. Now I'm cutting up jokes all night long.

You have to begin to develop a repertory of jokes, multi-plane spiritual jokes, the sort of things the Zen masters tell each other when they're asleep. These are the secret teachings.

I'm pretty laid-back in real life. I just love hanging with my friends and making jokes. The jokes don't stop - literally, all day.

Jokes rot. They're not like songs. I always envy singers - Sting is always going to sing 'Roxanne'. But people want to hear new jokes. I've written jokes as good as 'Roxanne', I believe. But I can't tell them again.

Not Going Out's jokes were based on the American mentality in terms of how often the jokes appear.

When you have a couple hundred people in one huge space, that's gonna lead to jokes and it's a breeding ground for practical jokes and teasing.

I think there are brilliant jokes to be made about abortion, and we should be able to talk about this in the way that we make jokes about death - you should be able to make jokes about everything.

I can't defend someone else's jokes. I can only defend my jokes, and I have to live with my own jokes.

I don't like the pressure to try to tell the best jokes. I'm not good at jokes.

I think you make better jokes when you don't break logic for the joke, unless you make a movie just about jokes.

The jokes are great but what really matters for a comedian is his performance, his whole attitude, and the laughs that he gets between the jokes rather than on top of the jokes.

I love inside jokes. I hope to be a part of one some day.

I had a moment where I was onstage once... As a comedian, you just think, 'Be funny as possible all the time - like, funny at all costs - jokes, jokes, jokes.' That's how my mentality was.

The inside jokes weren't jokes anymore. They had become stories. Nobody brought up the bad names or the bad times. And nobody felt sad as long as we could postpone tomorrow with more nostalgia.

I don't do any jokes that old. I might have maybe one or two jokes from high school that I still do.

I think I have got a lot better as an interviewer. I let people talk now which is something you need to do. At the beginning I thought jokes, jokes, jokes, I am a stand up comedian but I think I have mellowed out now.

I don't tend to like race jokes. I don't like Jew jokes and black jokes, and they make me very uncomfortable, probably because I'm both. Well, I'm not black - but if I was then I could dance better.

On 'Late Night,' it's like we're all in on the joke. That's what I wanted it to be. I'm not doing something sneaky. Inside jokes, I don't like those. We can all ride together, and everyone's on the same thing going, 'Aha, I know where you're going here.'

I have always loved really dense, complicated stories with lots of layers, tons of obscure literary references, and a plethora of inside jokes.

I really like intimate venues because it feels like everyone in the audience is in on all our inside jokes.

Tweeting is a great way to practice writing jokes, but there is so much more to comedy writing than just jokes. Jokes are a necessity, but you also have to learn how to write characters, to break a story, to keep coherence between episodes. I've learned more by being a TV writer than I ever could've on my own.

I feel like I'm a child of the Internet, and the Internet has raised me, and its jokes might not be appropriate at certain times. So, I keep them locked inside.

I am absolutely okay with jokes on me now, but initially, yes, I was perturbed ki why me? I am not a personality on whom jokes are made randomly. Later, I was like, if everyone is enjoying jokes on me, even I should laugh it off instead of opposing them.

Sometimes you look out the window and you look at all the windows, and think inside very single one of them is somebody with some huge, weird, terrible problem, some great jokes.

My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe.

For some reason, religious jokes seem as trivial as jokes about food or driving.

The Beloved is inside you and also inside me. You know the tree is hidden inside the seed. Let your arrogance go. None of us has gone far. Inside love there is more power than we realize.

My favorite moments are the moments everyone cries over. I see people in the audience crying, and I go, 'I did that, too. I don't just do the jokes. I also do the cries.' Jokes and cries, jokes and cries. That's all I'm here for, people.

I make comedies and I always try... I don't try but I allow to have at least 5% of the jokes or have some jokes that I know will be understood by only about 5% of the audience. It's that guy in the corner who gets it and laughs. But he has to have his jokes too. That's part of my audience. Part of my audience is the people who will only get certain things.

Wijnaldum always tries to do some jokes inside the dressing room. He's always winding people up. He always tries to speak in Portuguese or Spanish with us and dancing.

This was, I would later realise, a planet of things wrapped inside things. Food inside wrappers. Bodies inside clothes. Contempt inside smiles. Everything was hidden away.

There are two kinds of jokes - funny jokes and Jack Benny jokes.

People would say, "Oh, you say you just do jokes." I don't just do jokes. I do jokes. Jokes are important. They saved my life when I was younger. Hopefully we're making things nicer at the end of the day for people. That's the entire goal, and that's the touchstone and the North Star for the tone.

These days, I feel like a chunky spy in a thinner world. Strangers tell fat jokes in front of me. Jokes not meant for me. But... completely for the woman I used to be 150 pounds ago. The woman I could be again one day. The woman I will always be inside. Because being thinner doesn't make you a different person. It just makes you thinner.

God is always joking. Look at your own life - it is a joke! Look at other people's lives, and you will find jokes and jokes and jokes. Seriousness is illness; seriousness has nothing spiritual about it. Spirituality is laughter, spirituality is joy, spirituality is fun.

I decided that instead of making jokes about politics, I need to take part in it, and therefore, I can't make jokes and participate.

I do like rude jokes. They're men jokes.

It wasn't until I became more confident with myself and I put myself forward instead of the jokes; at first it was put the jokes out there and I'm just behind the jokes.

Jokes? There are no jokes. The truth is the funniest joke of all.

I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes. I don't know how to tell jokes.

I think jokes on colour or body shaming shouldn't be made. It's not funny to crack such jokes.

The thing about all good horror movies is that the fans expect a couple of inside jokes. Maybe I'm supposed to be saying how terrified I was while making it, but it was really fun.

I realized, in removing or rewriting these jokes, that often the jokes weren't done or that I was using, for me, the curse words as kind of a crutch. So then I just started writing.

The inside jokes weren't jokes anymore. they had become stories

Nobody had song titles that were as long as ours. A lot of it was just inside jokes.

I love jokes, but God, jokes can go so wrong. I have stayed up many nights thinking, "F**k. I can't believe I made that silly little joke. That was a disaster."

I try not to write jokes that are mean. I try my best to write jokes that are pretty universal and jokes that don't attack anyone. I know I often fall short of that and end up taking unfair swipes at people, but I try not to.

A lot of people get into stand-up as a back door into acting or something. But I really like writing jokes and telling jokes.