Top 1200 Comedy Club Quotes & Sayings - Page 4

As I have indicated some time ago, I intend to divest my shareholding when I leave the Club. In doing so, my overriding principle is that I shall do what I believe is best for the future of Celtic. I have also indicated my intention that my shareholding will be made available to be held broadly amongst the supporters and existing shareholders of the Club. I believe that this should produce the best structure of ownership for the Club and the Company.

Comedy did a lot of things for me. I mean, 'SNL'? Not too bad. Not too shabby with this comedy thing. I have really worked on my comedy and really upped it some notches.

I am not doing comedy because the genre is successful. If that was the case, I would have done a run-of-the-mill comedy film. I set my own trends. I like to give something new and different to my audiences. I want to do the kind of comedy that has been missing till now.

The first image I have of club owners is that the club is one of their toys and they do what they want and they lose a lot of money and they just don't care about who's working in it.

I hope to work sometime for an absolute top club. It should be no surprise that Manchester United are a dream club for me.

I wanted to be at Arsenal for my whole career. It is the club I love. It is the club I still support. I gave everything to play there.

In England, the club presidents do not seek publicity or have a high profile. In Spain, they like to be considered the most important person at the club.

Neck-down comedy was no longer valid after the 1980s alternative comedy revolution. Everything became about the cerebral. And with that came positive things - it helped get rid of some of the sexism and homophobia - but it also meant a lot of physical comedy was lost.

Every coach has to put himself in his club and to try to become a really important coach for his club. The most important thing is that the club can be happy, the fans can be happy, and the players can be happy with your work. This must be our task. Then, if you are No. 4, No. 5, No. 6, this is not important.

The way I approach any role, whether it's comedy or drama, I like to look for the truth first. I think comedy for the sake of comedy wears dull pretty quickly. You have to ground the character in reality first and allow the audience to sympathize, emphasize and be more invested.

I thought if I could do stand-up comedy well enough, I could parlay it back into films - like Charlie Chaplin and Woody Allen did. They merged principles of comedy and drama together, and that's what my first film really was, a stab at that kind of comedy.

It was football I enjoyed most. When I moved to L.A. to become a stand-up comedian, I thought it might be a good comedy hook to also be the punter for USFL club The L.A. Express, so I started practicing for the tryouts. Luckily, my stand-up took off, and I didn't need to do it.

I'm sorry, but I stand by my decision. I am now a member of the elite club of people that have fought a professional team mascot. You sir, are not in that club.

Once again it is peaceful at Augusta National Golf Club, after some rather ugly stand-offs in recent years, when the club balked at changing its all-white, all-male membership tradition. African-Americans and female Americans are on the club manifest now along with other golf-Americans, and all is serene once again.

I first did stand-up when I was 17, and then I passed out fliers for a comedy club (in New York City) and I got onstage whenever I could. And musical theater went out the window as soon as I started doing stand-up.

If you want to work as a coach for longer term you need consistency, trust in the club and also the environment around the club.

To me, real comedy comes out of behavior. It's the choices you make as an actor. It's never about, "I want to do a comedy script." I can't think of it that way. And besides, some of those movies, those comedy movies, I can't even watch them.

I have, for a few years, been writing comedy prose - short pieces for my blog - because I found it to be a good way to write while I was on a TV show. It was different enough from my scripts that it felt like a break, but it still was comedy and very fun. I like to do comedy!

All of us '60s pop stars came from old cities which had a jazz club, a folk club, a coffee house, and an art school.

Cancer has given me a dose of humility. I'm much more empathetic. It's a club I would rather not have joined, but it is a club.

There's no club out there that is really a step up when you play for Bayern Munich. At most, you can join a club that acts at the same level.

I'm a big believer in comedy writers. I've always defended the honor of all comedy writers. It's extremely difficult, but I've always felt that comedy writers far more easily can move toward drama than vice versa.

If you tell the reader it's funny, then the audience is like an audience at a stand-up comedy club and they expect you to be funny, and if you're not, they notice. Whereas if you read a regular op-ed about Israel or the family or medicine, you're not starting with the assumption that you're supposed to laugh.

Chelsea is a big club, a club that has given me the opportunity to play as a starter, to grow even more.

Live comedy in a club, with an audience - it's hard to recreate that experience in a digital world. With Zoom, your face is there the whole time, and you feel like you have to always be on. You feel like you always have to be paying attention, and it can be exhausting.

Science was always a passion, but I also loved 'Monty Python' and 'The Young Ones,' and I discovered the Footlights comedy club at university, where a lot of those people got their start. I had a go and loved it immediately. After that, I just couldn't stop writing sketches, and it all took off from there.

In my Comedy Club sets, I just work on what is fresh and try to build that show as long as I can. I don't like to do burnt material on stage. Even though my crowd loves to hear me do old stuff, I don't like to do old stuff.

I think the next United manager is already at the club. It could be either Ryan Giggs or Ole Gunnar Solksjaer, who isn't at the club.

When I was in grade school I was into chess club, Latin club, D&D, computer camp - everything that made vaginas go away.

Arsenal is a great club - the facilities are wonderful - but I feel it is a club that takes big care before signing a player, notably considering human values.

It is important for the club to find a balance in a world driven by economic and political needs. This club usually does that [on leaving Liverpool]

The entire world is skewed from the white male perspective. If you're a woman, they have to say it's a female-driven comedy. If it's a comedy with Latinos in it, it's a Latino comedy. 'Normal' is white male, and I find that to be shocking and ridiculous.

Comedy is the result of what's happening, not what people are doing. Because if people are doing comedy. It's embarrassing. The individual elements have to be straight-faced, serious, realistic with a firm basis. What makes it comedy is a somewhat shifted way to put it together.

I think it's great training for any comedian to start on cows. Because with cows, you expect them to be bored and just stare at you blankly. And that's exactly what you'll get at a comedy club. If you can toughen up with a cow audience, then you'll never be worried with a human audience.

The word 'supportive' has no place in stand-up comedy. I hate when people are like, 'Support female comedy.' That's not a real genre of comedy. I think if you have true respect for women as three-dimensional creators who are innovative, you wouldn't group them together like that.

I love Bournemouth. The place where we live is amazing. It's so chilled and nice, and also the club itself is a family club. Especially as a young player to come here, it's a perfect fit.

I'm not saying that comedy has to be a certain thing - I'm not trying to define comedy, where it's like, it can only be silly things. But I think part of what makes a comedy is that at least part of the mantra of the show is trying to make people laugh.

I think the process of 'SNL' is still pretty formal. You make an audition tape, your agent sends it in, they watch people's tapes, and then they invite people to perform at a comedy club in Los Angeles or New York. But I don't know how much actual scouting they do online.

It's comprised of both Republicans and Democrats and their membership in this club known as the establishment, party affiliation is second or third in terms of your qualifications to be in the club.

I used to go to the Improvisation Comedy Club every night in Times Square. How I didn't get killed in that area either means that 1) God is watching over me or 2) I am so insignificant to God that he didn't bother having me killed.

It's an honour to wear the shirt and the badge, and to be part of such an illustrious club is gonna be exciting, and putting that shirt on will be pretty special. Well, my message to Chelsea fans is that I can promise that I'll work hard and give my all for this club. Hopefully we can build up a good relationship over the next few years. And I'm just excited to be part of this whole club and organisation and bringing as much success to it as possible.

I was actually the head of the violin after-school club. And then I was also the head of the dance club, the popping club. So one day, just by coincidence, we had to hold the two clubs at the same time. I had to go back and forth. And that's when the idea came up for dancing and playing violin at the same time.

They have a choice as a club. They don't have to sell. Maybe Southampton's objectives have changed. They were looking to be a Champions League club, I believe. They obviously wanted to change... I don't have sympathy, no.

He who brings a style to a club that can't carry it out, he is not a good manager, because he is attacking the club that hires him.

I went back to Belfast and started a club, the Maritime. No one had thought about doing a blues club, so I was the first.

Schalke are my club. I used to stand on the terraces as a fan, and I've realised my dream of making it as a pro right here at my club.

It's a special club. It's got history. When I slip on the Manchester United shirt, it's like I'm wearing its past. So you have to sacrifice yourself for this club.

When I grew up, one of comedy idols was Rowan Atkinson, who of course is Mr. Bean and uses physical comedy. Same with Jim Carrey. Both of those guys. And Peter Sellers. Most of my comedy idols are physical comics.

I used to run a night club in Fort Myers, Florida called Norma Jean's Dance Club. That was the hottest spot from Sarasota to Cuba.

Why did I leave Valencia? Because the club needed me to. I was happy there and wouldn't have left, but the situation the club was in demanded it.

Leaving a club like Real and coming to as big a club as Manchester United makes you grow as a player and helps you progress in your career.

All I dreamed of when I became a footballer was to play for a club as big as Real Madrid. It's maybe the most famous and best club in the history of football.

When you leave a big club and go on loan to a small club in Holland it is not easy. But I am a footballer and I have to be professional about my job.

A comic, all they have to do is, if you do something funny in a comedy club and you put it up on you tube, it might get a million hits! All it needs to do is resonate with one person who sends it to their friends, who sends it to other people, and before you know it, it has spread virally and BOOM! All of a sudden that person has a name.

I think there's just too much comedy. Sometimes I get requests from people: 'How do I get into comedy?' And I always say that what we need is more people in health care. And less people in comedy.

Internationally and in foreign markets, movies starring women don't make as much money as movies starring men. And then you can blame filmmakers, especially in comedy, which is my bread and butter, because it's become a bit of a boys' club over the years. With the boys in charge you get these takes on women which are either the girlfriend or the mean wife or the girl who appears in a romantic comedy. You're just getting either men's fantasies about women or what they think is the reality about women instead of men just having a healthy attitude about women.

I think women are different, and I think having them in the room is crucial to a family comedy, ensemble comedy, television comedy, where half the eyeballs on your show are women.

I was thinking about comedy and how comedy in many ways opens us up to ideas and really being influenced by Richard Pryor and sort of the way he would use comedy to really speak about larger social issues.

Tottenham are a beautiful club, a traditional club in England.

I consider my comedy to be dramatic comedy. I always wanted music underscoring the dramatic monologue. It was always drama with comedy, in my head.