Top 1200 Dirty Jokes Quotes & Sayings - Page 17
Explore popular Dirty Jokes quotes.
Last updated on November 19, 2024.
'Friends' was great fun, but I was just there so they could make some funny jokes about England.
Penn & Teller stopped doing practical jokes, and the reason is we got much too good at it.
'Cartoonists' dirty secret is that we tend to come up with stories that involve things that are really fun to draw.
You never want to be the one who everyone is going to bust jokes on. The only way to prevent that is to be good at something.
Even if it's a white crowd, I tell my jokes for the four black people in the room, not the 100 whites.
Maintaining silence about a dirty truth is another way of lying, a common practice in high places.
I never was shy, but as far as telling jokes, I'm the worst. I like physical comedy; it's where I feel comfortable.
I had the notion that I wanted to write the great dirty American novel, so I went to Roanoke College on the GI Bill.
I am a product... I'm a comedian. I'm not curing cancer. In the end, I tell jokes. I make people laugh.
Soon I learned that the worse the puns and jokes, the funnier they could be, if you knew how to deliver them.
I have jokes I've told before and will tell again, but my favorite part of the night is talking to the crowd.
How did sex come to be thought of as dirty in the first place? God must have been a Republican.
I really don't do fat jokes. I talk about the trials and tribulations of being a large mammal in America.
Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.
I have a file of four million jokes... I have them cross-indexed. Whatever subject you want, I have a joke on it.
You throw a perfectly straight line at the audience and then, right at the end, you curve it. Good jokes do that.
I just often find myself getting shrill, angry and the jokes get more incredulous.
I don't laugh so much at jokes and premises as I do at a guy who goes onstage and starts twitching and acting funny.
I was a class clown. At 12, I was definitely clowning. I was making all the jokes. But I was smart, so the teachers didn't know what to do with me.
Before 'Fringe' I was in 'Dirty Sexy Money' playing Jeremy Darling who was this bratty New York socialite.
If I were bombing with my jokes in English, I would go back to France. Maybe do that mime thing.
Donald Trump has shown that he will essentially attack individuals, make Second Amendment jokes.
I'm the dirtiest of the dirty. I mess up all the time. I suck as a Christian. I can't stand religion. But I love Jesus, and I'm trying.
My life will always have dirty dishes. If this sink can become a place of contemplation, let me learn constancy here.
Sign at a Kentucky appliance store: Don't kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work.
I'm a musician first, a food-lover second, a dirty mouth with feet, and a girl last time I checked.
The whole experience of doing a sitcom is... Telling jokes with such precision is really exciting, but it's also terrifying.
Russell Crowe likes to tell jokes, which I can't. I can't remember a joke to save my life. I don't have a brain for it.
The audience loves when the comedian talks to them. You're creating inside jokes, which creates a community.
I tell jokes, and I have fun, but I tend to worry about everybody and everything throughout the entire world.
There is laughter, shrill calls. Everyone is flirting, saying in nudges and jokes and blushing what they would do in private
I used to write jokes with friends. We'd pick a topic and then think out loud, brainstorm.
I've never written jokes. I mean, I'll write things on a piece of paper and riff on them onstage.
My dad loves going backstage. I try not to have him give too many jokes to people.
I bullshit on the phone all day with a variety of people discussing various projects, and occasionally write jokes.
It seems that two of the most basic forms of comedy are jokes and stories. And, of course, they are not mutually exclusive.
I don't care what the haters and naysayers say. If they make jokes about me, I'll laugh because they'll probably be funny.
Please use anger for something positive like hurting people that deserve it or writing jokes.
I've actually phased out the misogynistic jokes because I used to think that everyone knew that I was joking.
If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
Family jokes, though rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive.
Zac Efron is like a brother who's just goofy and crazy. He plays a lot of practical jokes.
Humorists are using Twitter to tell jokes in an interesting way. It doesn't have to be profound, and it doesn't have to be earth-shaking, but it is transformative.
I do all the dirty work: play defense, grab rebounds, block shots and finish strong around the rim.
If you live in a dirty big city, it means that you surely need a pastoral life to make yourself clean!
There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
All the jokes in my films, the comedy, they're not me, I just try to hold a big mirror up to us.
I shouldn't tell jokes about my wife. she's attached to a machine that keeps her alive... The refrigerator.
What I'm doing in the work I do, I prefer not to just have a series of jokes. It's nice when audiences can connect with the characters as well.
One of the great things about kids is they haven't heard a lot of the old jokes. You can get away with the corny ones.
People appreciate it when you take some time to think about who will be listening to your jokes.
Nobody had song titles that were as long as ours. A lot of it was just inside jokes.
A friend of mine jokes that I have a painstaking royalty complex. Like maybe I was a duke in a past life.
You have to have a passionate opinion; otherwise you sound false. You end up telling the audience jokes they've already heard.
At some point, you realize that people might be laughing at your jokes because they're afraid not to laugh.
I am leaving the town to the invaders: increasingly numerous, mediocre, dirty, badly behaved, shameless tourists.
Chucks are cooler when they're dirty. I actually stepped on somebody's the other day because they were too clean.
The jokes that take my last name and equate them to a sex act ... is a really cruel thing to do.
When you hire directors, you're most concerned about whether or not someone from the outside will get the jokes.
Women are not children. We are not fragile little birds who can't cope with jokes, works of art, or controversial speakers.
