Top 1200 Douche Bag Quotes & Sayings

If I forgot to put something on, and I have to wear a trash bag, I'm just like, 'I'm gonna rock a trash bag today.'

We are past the stage in our relations that you come to Washington with an empty goody bag and then you go back with a bag filled with stuff.

Gentlemen, a depression is for capitalism like a good, cold douche.

Larry's zombie bag was a nearly virulent green with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on it. I was almost afraid to ask what his vampire bag looked like.

Coffee it is best to buy by the bag, as it improves by keeping. Let it hang in the bag, in a dry place, and it loses its rank smell and taste.

Think about what happens on Earth when you throw up. You throw up and you have a bag of something horrible and then you throw it away, but if I have this bag, what am I going to do with it? This bag is going to stay with me in space for months, so we want a really good barf bag.

Even though you may think someone is a douche, you shouldn't mock a victim of violence because that victimizes them again.

I may be a douche to some people, but I actually do run companies.

My sleeping bag is affixed to a wall and I climb inside and sort of float around in the sleeping bag at night while I'm sleeping.

It was like I had evolved to a certain stage where I was stuck in this songwriter bag as an image. But basically at heart, I'm a rocker. And I still am. But I was caught up in the singer/songwriter bag and I wasn't really enjoying it.

My mom allowed me to take an old burlap bag and fill it with moss, corn stalks and rocks, then hang it from a tree and spend an hour a day punching my heavy bag.

And he paddled away in his douche canoe.

I have a few customers who have two or three hundred bags. When you see a lady carrying a little dog bag or a little cat bag or an egg, it makes you happy.

Oh- and grab the plastic bag over by my suitcase." I slug down the last of the coffee and get up. The bag contains panty hose. I put them on her desk. "They're for you." "You want me to look homeless, desperate, but also kind of fabulous?

I'm definitely a jaded traveler, but you try to make the best of what you know about the experience. Like, I know how to pack a bag. I know that checking a bag is for rookies.

It's much easier to create a high-end bag than a mass market bag that everyone can afford.

I once went into a meeting, and every woman put her a million-pound bag on the table. Then I'm there with my tote bag and anorak. And I'm like, well, I'm still the most important person in the room right now.

I'm a double bagger. Not only does my husband put a bag over my face when we're making love, but he also puts a bag over his head in case mine falls off.

There is no article of men's clothing that can make a man look more like a douche than the ascot. There are, however, a few men who can pull it off. Context is everything.

New Orleans invented the brown paper bag party - usually at a gathering in a home - where anyone darker than the bag attached to the door was denied entrance. The brown bag criterion survives as a metaphor for how the black cultural elite quite literally establishes caste along color lines within black life.

You can pack a bag and take a plane somewhere, anywhere, and when you get there and open the bag - lying right on top will be whatever you're running away from. The very first thing you'll have to unpack.

Wisdom is like the rain. Its source is unlimited, but it comes down according to the season. Grocers put sugar in a bag, but their supply of sugar is not the amount in the bag. When you come to a grocer, he has sugar in abundance. But he sees how much money you have brought and gives accordingly. Your currency on this Path is resolution and faith, and you are taught according to your resolution and faith. When you come seeking sugar, they examine your bag to see what its capacity is; then they measure out accordingly.

you're smart, pretty, and you aren't a douche purse.

When do you stop to de-douche?

Romance is the douche of the bourgeoisie.

Justin Bieber is a douche bag. Now that I have your attention, let's talk about cars.

I don't think women need another black bag. Everybody has a black bag already, so I thought this season (needs) color.

Whether it's a canvas tote or Givenchy, a day bag you love is essential. It doesn't have to be a fashion It bag of the season, either.

A Birkin bag is a very good rain hat; just put everything else in a plastic bag.

I have this little, tiny Dusty Rhodes figure they make in Japan that people always give me in my bag. I set it next to the title and took a picture of it in my bag. That was my big goal in the industry. I wasn't able to achieve that in his lifetime, but he always believed.

Granuaile looked terminally depressed when she emerged from the bathroom with raven hair and, as a result rather Goth by accident. She didn't want to get her picture taken. "Aughh!" she said miserably, looking in the vanity mirror in the truck of the cab and fingering a wavy curl near her temple. "This sucks more than anything has ever sucked before. You know what we look like? A couple of emo douche bags." "Well, look at the bright side, Granuaile. Emo Douche Bags would be a great band name." [That's brilliant! It's already the unofficial name of more bands than I can count.]

My mom was one of the original designers for Coach in the eighties, and she designed some classics, including the City Bag. It's the only bag I use!

I got caught stealing when I was a kid from the local bodega right across the street from where we lived. I tried to steal a big bag of Red Hot Dollars. And I swear, I was about 7 years old and the bag was bigger'n me.

Granuaile:"So why don't cult leaders achieve godhood?" Atticus:" Because they're megalomaniacs drenched in douche juice.

An It bag is an It bag, only if you’re unlikely to possess it.

I can write anywhere. I made up the names of the characters on a sick bag while I was on an airplane. I told this to a group of kids and a boy said, "Ah, no, that's disgusting." And I said, "Well, I hadn't used the sick bag."

When I go to bed at night, I wear a sleeping bag. And for a long time, I wore mittens so that I couldn't open the sleeping bag.

We sleep very well in space. We have a sleeping bag each, and when you get into it, you float in the sleeping bag.

Now that 'Scrubs' is over, people seem to feel more comfortable telling me that I was a total douche to them for the past 8 years. And the whole time I'm thinking, 'Who ARE you?'

I sleep in this really cool thing that is a sleeping bag. It is a spray-tan sleeping bag - Amazon Prime honey, it will save your life.

But you see now baby, whether you have a ph.d., d.d. or no d, we're in this bag together. And whether you are from Morehouse or Nohouse, we,re still in this bag together.

You take all the offensive linemen and put them in a burlap bag, and then you take a baseball bat and beat on the bag. You’re sacking them. You’re bagging them. And that’s what you’re doing with a quarterback.

I've never changed my life since I was 4 and went to the YMCA with a gym bag. I still have that philosophy. In fact, I still have that gym bag.

I need to be able to be at a gig and just put my bag on the floor and not worry about it being stood on or getting ruined. You want a bag that can go through anything. And a little bit of softness is always lovely. If I don't have a dog, I can just pet my bag!

I woke up, a bag of bones. Literally. They had gathered up my bones and put them in a bag and thrown the bag into a river.

J. P. Morgan. He was kind of a douche.

My most treasured item is the brown leather bag that my mum bought me from a little Italian shop for my 21st. It's supposed to be a vanity bag, but I use it as a handbag.

It's definitely fun to play something you're not, which is always a good time. Who doesn't want to get to act like a jerk or a douche, every now and then?

To me, a bag in a tree is like a flag of chaos, and when I remove it, I'm capturing the flag of the other side. In the end, it doesn't matter how ironic or serious or even effective on a larger scale bag snagging may be.

Yeah Jesus could turn water in to wine, but he didn't share. Douche.

In the sports hostel, I would not eat the boiled egg and would store it away in my bag. But eventually, Nambiar sir found out and gave me a yelling. There were so many eggs in my bag and they started smelling.

To fill a small bag means selecting,and choosing, and evaluating. There's no logicial end to that process. Pretty soon I would have a big bag, and then two or three. A month later I'd be like the rest of you.

I think that the lack of intuition in fashion today is one of the most dangerous things. My fear is that our business is turning into a bag business, and it's all about the bag. But it's not only about the bag. It's about the women. And it's not about a bag or a shoe or the jewelry. It's only about women. . . . Being almost politically correct and doing only what you expect without the ability to make mistakes is very dangerous to fashion. We have to go with our heart. We have to go with our intuition.

I got a long road ahead of me to make people believe i'm not actually a huge douche...

I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head breaks.

Father' is such an arbitary word. Douche bag, on the other hand.

I would run into the corner store, the bodega, and just grab a paper bag or buy juice - anything just to get a paper bag. And I'd write the words on the paper bag and stuff these ideas in my pocket until I got back. Then I would transfer them into the notebook.

Have you ever wondered why the rich and privileged care about, or even bother with, the gift bag? Because they don't need this stuff. If they wanted it, they could afford to buy it, without blinking. But they love the gift bag, beyond reason.

I went to the airport, I put my bag in the x-ray machine, I found out my bag has cancer. It only has six more months to hold stuff.

I have a bag with a toothbrush and toothpaste and all the things I might need during the day. I call the bag my trailer. Sometimes you don't have a trailer, so that's my trailer.