Top 1200 Funny Bar Quotes & Sayings - Page 20

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.

The crypto market has set the bar shockingly low for entrepreneurs to raise money, and this is dangerous for everyone involved.

I've set the bar high in terms of having a very feminist attitude towards how I present my body.

I'll say it loud and proud: AEW has raised the bar. Everyone is doing better, because they have come along.

I've said this numerous times: I've been in the ring with Daniel Bryan, and he's the best wrestler in the world, bar none.

[An article about Cho] started out, "Funny, sexy, zaftig Margaret Cho..." What is "zaftig?" Isn't that German for "big fat pig?" I guess I was lucky - "zaftig" is kind of a nice word. It could have been, "Funny, sexy, OBESE Margaret Cho."

My mom's a lawyer. She was part of the group that wrote the bar exam. My father is a dentist. They've always worked.

Language learning deserves special mention. It is, bar none, the best thing you can do to hone clear thinking.

That young man seeks opportunities to test his principles as readily as a drunk picks fights in a bar.

I try not to read acting books any more, but they set a high bar for me very early on.

In Cancun, they put me up on a trapeze bar and I was carried across the ceiling over 2,000 people.

Some people say funny things, but I say things funny.

Being a writer in Hollywood is like going to Hitler's Eagle Nest with a great idea for a bar mitzvah.

Kind of the exhausting thing about doing pure comedy, or something that's broader, is you're kind of a slave to the laugh. If it's not funny, then there's not much point in doing it. The kind of über-objective is to make people laugh. You always have to have that in the back of your mind, "Eh, I've got to figure out a way to make this funny."

Roblox is all about having great user-created content. It really ups the bar in the quality of the game.

I meditate, I do yoga and I have a lot of friends who are healers.....And if none of that works, I go by a chocolate bar and a bottle of cognac.

I lived across the street from Noodle Bar. I could barely stand it, because you're there all the time; you can't get away.

I am very excited to confirm I will be at BAR. I wish to thank Ferrari for six fantastic years.

Going before an audience of people who expect you to be funny is tough. Going before an audience that expect you to be boring, and then being a little funny, is much easier. I prefer easier.

As I've always said, 'I'm a lover, not a fighter.' I'm much better with women than I am being tough in a bar!

Sunset and evening star, And one clear call for me! And may there be no moaning of the bar When I put out to sea.

I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody who was a television writer and make them funny. And I discovered a lot of great writers that went on to do a lot of great shows like 'Seinfeld,' 'Friends,' you know, 'Three and a Half Men.'

Some people say funny things - but I say things funny.

I don't consider myself a funny girl, but I do have a sense of humor because I don't take myself too seriously. Taking yourself too seriously, I think, is not right. Life is supposed to be funny. Because if you can laugh about yourself when you made a mistake or when you did something wrong, you can learn from it.

A comic says funny things. A comedian says things funny.

I know what is funny coming out of my mouth and what is not funny coming out of my mouth. You have to figure out, What is the joke that I can do that nobody else can do?

Ina May Gaskin is the most important person in maternity care in North America, bar none.

Front squats and trap bar deadlifts are the two best big compound movements for quad growth.

Dwayne Betts is the kind of man who should be receiving awards from the Connecticut bar. Instead, he hasn't been admitted.

I don't trust tragedies much. It's easy to make a person sad by showing him something tragic. We all recognize when sad things happen: someone dies, someone loses a loved one, young love is crushed. It's much harder to make a man laugh-what's funny to one person isn't funny to another.

We have wasted History like a bunch of drunks shooting dice back in the men's crapper of the local bar.

If you're the band leader you ask more of yourself than anyone else, so they tend to raise the bar for me.

For me, the main thing is that I continually improve my game and make sure I keep setting the bar high.

The Bar Association can do so much in teaching people how to resolve conflicts without knives and guns and fists.

I don't think I'll get married again. I'm not looking for it. What I can say about my divorce and my failed engagement is that I learned where my bar is.

Just to talk in front of people is scary. And now you gotta learn how to be funny, and now you gotta learn how to make people laugh at what you think is funny. That's not easy.

Steven Spielberg's mother, who said to E.T., I don't care where you're from, you're here and you're gonna get bar mitzvahed! Never got a dinner!

Life is a sleazy stranger, who looks vaguely familiar; flirting with a bimbo named disaster at the end of the bar.

Sometimes what I wouldn't give to have us sitting in a bar again at 9:00 a.m. telling lies to one another, far from God.

I went to a Karaoke Bar last night that didn't play any 70s music, at first I was afriad, oh I was petrified

Kind of the exhausting thing about doing pure comedy, or something that's broader, is you're kind of a slave to the laugh. If it's not funny, then there's not much point in doing it. The kind of ueber-objective is to make people laugh. You always have to have that in the back of your mind, 'Eh, I've got to figure out a way to make this funny.'

I had this very strict rule when I began auditioning that I wasn't gonna do a thicker accent, because it was like, 'I can't tell if it's supposed to be funny because he talks funny.' And now I feel like there are certain characters that I could play that could involve doing a thicker accent, as long as it's specific to that character.

Great, big, serious novels always get awards. If it's a battle between a great, big, serious novel and a funny novel, the funny novel is doomed.

Any comic can get on the radio show and be funny. You can get that on any morning radio show or afternoon radio show. There are plenty of people who do that. It's not a difficult format, to sit around with two or three comics and be funny.

We live in a funny time, a funny era, when desire, to be adult desire, has to be conceived as sexual. And that didn't used to be the case. Sexuality is a social construction as much as anything else and I think the realities of sexuality don't always fit into the social constructions that we have, and we live in a goal-oriented time - on all fronts.

I love funny women. I love writing funny women characters.

The mother- poor invaded soul- finds even the bathroom door no bar to hammering little hands.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman looks at them and says: "Is this some kind of a joke?"

Farrell's Bar in Brooklyn had urinals so large they looked like shower stalls for Toulouse-Lautrec.

Human beings should not be reduced to a state to where they almost get into a fight over a small bar of soap.

The uneven bars make me especially nervous because when you stop training, you lose sense of where the bar is going to be.

The labor of a human being is not a commodity or article of commerce. You can't weigh the soul of a man with a bar of pig-iron.

The United States is the only country left now, bar Romania, Bulgaria and Poland, that has this all-government system.

I was brought up in the East End, and if a man was inappropriate in a bar, you'd throw your drink over him.

I think my peak 90s moment was posing on a Harley-Davidson outside the Met Bar with Wyclef Jean.

It's funny: most people who recognize me on the subway and stuff - it's much more they think of me as a funny guy. I get much more of people telling me how much I make them laugh, actually. Which is nice.

I've never met a woman ever, anywhere, bar none, that was more feminine than Dixie Carter.

I just knew that I was funny, and I knew that it was just a matter of time. I didn't know what was going to actually happen - this is definitely way bigger than I thought - but I knew there was no way I was going to be that funny, and nobody was going to notice it.

I basically can't go to any gay bar in America without getting mobbed, which is fun and tiring.

My first waitress job was at Johnny Rockets in New Jersey, and then I waited tables at a sports bar.