Top 1200 Funny Business Quotes & Sayings - Page 15

I'm feeling like the music business is reaping what it's sown. It's going through what inevitably it was going to go through. It was a very decadent, very glamorous business that took advantage of a lot of people for a long time and didn't do things right and had a poor business model.

Nowadays they have 12 directors and 15 producers and 30 writers. And all the writers want their lines said a certain way-which isn't necessarily funny. I mean the lines aren't necessarily so funny to begin with.

Reynie's fce fell. 'It's not funny, Kate.' For a moment - a fleeting moment - Kate looked desperately sad. 'Well, of course it's not funny, Reynie Muldoon. But what do you want me to do? Cry?

As a serial investor who has raised hundreds of millions of dollars for startups, I know that the business plans coming out of incubators tend to be vetted and more thoroughly validated. The incubator's input into your business plan will make you look far more polished and experienced - even if you have never run a business before.

Bette Davis had very strong opinions and was not afraid to express them. She wasn't afraid of anything that I ever saw. And she was so funny. She's just funny and she was laughing all the time.

The big problem for comic art is you don't want to overwork it. If a drawing is overworked it isn't funny. It's the spontaneity that keeps a work fresh and funny. If they can see how hard you work, if they can see the beads of sweat, it's no good. I always try to make it look easy.

Here`s a guy who says he`s a great businessman. But it seems like a lot of Trump's business is built around stiffing small businesses and workers out of what he owes them, work they`ve done. He thinks that`s cute or smart or funny to basically not pay somebody who`s done work for him and say go ahead and sue me because I`ve got more money than you and you can`t do anything about it.

You mostly know that you want to be funny, know that you have the desire. It's not like people who grow up beautiful and can look in the mirror and be like, I'm beautiful! Funny is more of a journey. And a desperate attempt.

I always tend to remember the funny moments. When I lost my shoe (even though it was funny) there was something motivating about it, I just ended in this spastic emotional way. I tend to remember the more extreme moments.

I went out with seven actors in a row. There are problems with that. I've had the really good-looking dramatic actor, and that has its problems. And then I'll go out with the funny guy. It's almost like the funny guy has more to prove.

I always thought when I was doing more melodramatic stuff like Everwood that the directors were constantly reeling me in and stopping me from being funny. I've always tried to find a funny angle on things, and 99 percent of the time, it just doesn't work.

Anybody can go onstage and be dirty. You have to be funny, that's the key. You can say anything as long as it's funny. You can't take it too seriously up there. And people coming to see you can't take it too seriously.

What's interesting about Laurel and Hardy is that in most comedy teams, there's a straight man, and then there's the funny guy. And with Laurel and Hardy, they're both the funny guy.

I've experienced plenty of times when something I think is funny doesn't do very well. And there are times when something I don't think is funny makes the audience laugh so hard.

I think it's funny that nobody wants to be liked by Washington. All the politicians go, 'I don't like Washington. They don't like me.' I always find it funny that people are trying to distance themselves from Washington as much as they can, even though they're all in Washington.

I always say, if I tell you a joke right now and it's funny, you laugh. Now, we set the lights, and I tell you the joke again, it's hard to find it funny the second time.

I don't think comedy is something you learn. I think it's something that's either there or it's not. When I read a script, I have to see the funny, and if I can see it's funny, it helps me to be able to transmit that.

The essence of a good investment manager is one who studies a given business and extrapolates the future cash flows that the business is likely to generate over the next several years. Based on the cash flow and asset assessment, they can then arrive at their expected rate of return if they bought a fraction of that business at a given price.

Laurence Olivier said in an interview once that when he plays a tragedy he always aims for the funny parts, and the other way around. Because in a comedy you look for what's serious. I think that's true. Sometimes things are really funny if you're absolutely earnest. If you're really serious, it's hilarious.

When you're doing comedy, it is so subjective. What is funny to you is not funny to another person. What is dirty to you is not dirty to the other person. Comedy is one of those things you throw against the wall and see what sticks.

The middle class is so funny, it's the class I know best, and it's the class where you find the most pretension, so that's what makes the middle classes so funny.

We've all seen comedians look like they're reaching just a little bit too much for the laugh. This is counterproductive. The conceit of standup is that it is effortless, which makes the prospect of generating new comedy a tricky one: you are trying to be funny without looking like you are trying to be funny.

You get to the end of something, you're laughing, you're like, 'That's funny, and that's funny,' and then you get to the end, and the credits come down, and you're like, 'That's it?! That's the whole thing?! You had me here for that?!' I just don't want to do that.

The magic in performing as an entertaining ventriloquist happens when the characters come to life and the interaction between the separate personalities on stage becomes 'real.' Then don't forget that the act has to be funny, and to me, being funny and entertaining any given audience is more important than anything.

Habits are funny things. What's funny, or rather tragic, is that bad habits are so predictable and avoidable. Despite this, there are people by the millions who insist on acquiring habits that are bad, expensive, and create problems. The habit they weren't going to get, got them!

I think David Letterman is a genius. Night after night he is funny and smart. He seems to really enjoy his jokes. They seem connected to who he really is. I like watching him, and there is no one better at turning an awkward moment into something very funny.

Business owners are like joggers. If you stop a jogger, he goes on running on the spot. If you drag an owner away from his business, he goes on running on the spot, pawing the ground, talking business. He never stops hurtling onwards, making decisions and executing them.

Humor is not funny. Humor is something else. Funny is a joke, sometimes silly. Comedy is deep and connected to tragedy; comedy could be deeper than tragedy, in my view.

When I say something funny, I don’t laugh, so my friends are always like, ‘Hahahahaaaa!’ so people know. When I’m not with them, I always think, This person doesn’t know I’m funny; they just think I’m a jerk.

I've been seesawing between not doing too much racial stuff - because I'd rather be known as the funny comedian than the funny Chinese comedian - but at the same time embracing my voice and who I am and what makes me unique, you know, which is the racial background.

It's funny how you can look back in life and there are all these 'if's' - if this hadn't happened would I have been here? If I hadn't done this would I have ended up talking to you? It's funny how life is seriously just a bunch of those moments.

I probably would never be able to direct a comedy because I'm not that funny. I don't have that funny bone in me, so it wouldn't be a natural fit. But I love the world of science fiction, and I love the world of technology and science too.

Football is not merely a small business, it's also a bad one. Anyone who spends any time inside football soon discovers that just as oil is part of the oil business, stupidity is part of the football business.

It's funny looking at yourself. You know how it is when you look back at old pictures? It's just funny looking back at yourself walking and talking at age 14

Business is essentially applied rationality: a systematic process of thinking that produces a real-world result. Instead of mortgaging your life to go to business school, it's possible to dramatically increase your knowledge of business on your own time and with little cost - without setting foot inside a classroom.

You find out in life that people really like you funny. So what do you give 'em? Humor. And then if you show them the other side, they don't like you as much. I find, too, that I can hide behind the idiot's mask being funny, and you never see the sorrow or the pain.

I have my website, The Ruckus, which is an Internet site, similar to the Funny or Die format, where people post funny videos. I get a chance to rate their videos; they get a chance to blog and kick it with me.

There is always something funny going on between scenes with Adam Sandler. He's always cracking jokes and yelling at people for no reason. It's pretty funny. He'll joke around during scenes, too. When he guest-starred on 'Jessie,' there was nothing in the script that he said first take.

I'm definitely in the market for being uncool. There was some funny stuff, like the thing about making sure I show people that I have tattoos and cigarettes so that they know I'm badass. But really, I do have tattoos! And I do smoke cigarettes sometimes, and I can't change that. But I am not badass, by any means. I do some stuff that's tongue-in-cheek, and some stuff that's on the line. And it could be funny, it could be serious, and I never even know myself, because it could be funny that day, and the next day it's totally embarrassing.

Andy Parsons was always very funny. He was in a double act with a guy called Henry Naylor. Dan Mazer was always a very funny guy.

Don't try to give a funny opinion; give your opinion in a way that will be funny.

I regret behaving badly when I was younger. I did not know any better at the time. The thing is that the incidents that I caused were not funny... Youth is wasted on the young. It is better to have the wisdom of an old man in a young body... I was a bit foolish and teased people, trying to be funny.

It was all very strange, Mr. Gray thought, as he wiped the coffee canister clean with a sponge. Very, very mysterious. You were born; you lived a whole life; and at the end, you wound up in a coffee canister. "Ah, well," he said out loud quietly. "That's just the way things are. Life's a funny business." Death, he supposed, was the punch line.

If you run your business fairly; if you treat people well; if you try to move your business into areas that are making a real positive difference to other peoples lives; I think you'll A. have much pleasant life, but B. I think you'll have a much more successful business.

It is the performance of the business that matters. It is hard enough to figure out the future of the business. Do not try to figure out the future of the country or the world; focus on the business.

I don't think any of us would be who we are if our parents weren't who they were. People that are in show business, and their parents are not in show business, their parents probably motivated them to get in show business.

It's funny looking at yourself. You know how it is when you look back at old pictures? It's just funny looking back at yourself walking and talking at age 14.

Let's be honest. There's not a business anywhere that is without problems. Business is complicated and imperfect. Every business everywhere is staffed with imperfect human beings and exists by providing a product or service to other imperfect human beings.

Couples are really funny, because if they are together, they can fight and do fun things together. In Jane Austen books, marriage is the end of the story, but I actually think a really funny couple could be a fun thing to watch.

When I was in college, I had a friend who was an artist and her theory was that all the best art in the world is funny/sad. That was her favorite genre. Funny/sad are probably my two favorite tones.

The times I've tried not to be funny, it's never worked, and the times I'm trying not to be dark and just be funny, that never works, either. As varied as my subject matter is, I think the worldview is pretty consistent: seeing darkness and seeing humor.

Well, I mean, if a joke or humor is bawdy, it's got to be funny enough to warrant it. You can't just have it bawdy or dirty just for the sake of being that - it's got to be funny.

I was raised by the last of the Gorgeous George era. You don't let somebody come from some other business, walk in your business, make a fool of ya and go back into his business and laugh at ya. So if you watch Wrestlemania the very first one, I was the general and here was the rule: don't let Mr. T throw a punch; keep it strictly amateur with him.

I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody who was a television writer and make them funny.

I also found it funny to think about blackness as the second person. That was just sort of funny. Not the first person, but the second person, the other person.

Here's another way of putting it. Roosevelt wants recovery to start at the bottom. In other words, by a system of high taxes, he wants business to help the little fellow to get started and get some work, and then pay business back by buying things when he's at work. Business says, 'Let everybody alone. Let business alone, and quit monkeying with us, and we'll get everything going for you, and if we prosper, naturally the worker will prosper.'

I try to think of something catchy to say, but there's nothing but irritation that something that was funny yo an eleven-year-old boy is still funny to a seventeen-year-old one.

As a kid, I thought of myself as a funny person who secretly wanted to be serious, but now I think maybe I'm a serious person who secretly wants to be funny.

It's just so funny that when I was growing up, I was very much of an Australian. I just thought it was funny that there was this war, like, 'No, she's ours, she's practically a Miss Australia.' But I am a Miss Philippines.

For years, people have been trying to talk to me about doing a show, and I wouldn't do one because I'm a serious business guy. I'm not going to do a stupid show. So, the opportunity came up with CNBC, and we started talking. It became a real business show. It's educational, people watch it, and it's great for small business.