Top 1200 Funny Comedian Quotes & Sayings - Page 17

The magic in performing as an entertaining ventriloquist happens when the characters come to life and the interaction between the separate personalities on stage becomes 'real.' Then don't forget that the act has to be funny, and to me, being funny and entertaining any given audience is more important than anything.

Up North you are holding your own. Everyone considers themselves a comedian.

There's something about being a parent that has, I think, made me a better comedian.

A comedian who starts talking to himself becomes his own audience. This is fatal.

The one thing that's depressing as a comedian to realize is that rock stars get groupies, and comedians don't.

Jack is really the new breed, a wild-man comedian. America's funnyman.

The French are funny, sex is funny, and comedies are funny, yet no French sex comedies are funny.

If you can't write your own material, you have very little chance of making it as a comedian.

I probably would never be able to direct a comedy because I'm not that funny. I don't have that funny bone in me, so it wouldn't be a natural fit. But I love the world of science fiction, and I love the world of technology and science too.

When you're doing comedy, it is so subjective. What is funny to you is not funny to another person. What is dirty to you is not dirty to the other person. Comedy is one of those things you throw against the wall and see what sticks.

Anybody can go onstage and be dirty. You have to be funny, that's the key. You can say anything as long as it's funny. You can't take it too seriously up there. And people coming to see you can't take it too seriously.

My only goal as a comedian was to stomp the life out of the model-minority myth.

Humor is not funny. Humor is something else. Funny is a joke, sometimes silly. Comedy is deep and connected to tragedy; comedy could be deeper than tragedy, in my view.

The middle class is so funny, it's the class I know best, and it's the class where you find the most pretension, so that's what makes the middle classes so funny.

It's funny how you can look back in life and there are all these 'if's' - if this hadn't happened would I have been here? If I hadn't done this would I have ended up talking to you? It's funny how life is seriously just a bunch of those moments.

I realize how desperate it sounds for me, as a comedian, to ask you to laugh at my jokes.

When I was in college, I had a friend who was an artist and her theory was that all the best art in the world is funny/sad. That was her favorite genre. Funny/sad are probably my two favorite tones.

I try to think of something catchy to say, but there's nothing but irritation that something that was funny yo an eleven-year-old boy is still funny to a seventeen-year-old one.

Well, I mean, if a joke or humor is bawdy, it's got to be funny enough to warrant it. You can't just have it bawdy or dirty just for the sake of being that - it's got to be funny.

Even if I wasn't an actress or a comedian, I would be spreading love and laughter [with] whatever I did.

The big problem for comic art is you don't want to overwork it. If a drawing is overworked it isn't funny. It's the spontaneity that keeps a work fresh and funny. If they can see how hard you work, if they can see the beads of sweat, it's no good. I always try to make it look easy.

Andy Parsons was always very funny. He was in a double act with a guy called Henry Naylor. Dan Mazer was always a very funny guy.

Too much comedy today is vulgar, not clever. I say that as a comedian and as a consumer.

All that the comedian has to show for his years of work and aggravation is the echo of forgotten laughter.

I don't have any horror stories of trying to start as a comedian and eating it constantly on stage.

Stand-up comedy is a science. Every comedian is a psychology major, naturally.

I think David Letterman is a genius. Night after night he is funny and smart. He seems to really enjoy his jokes. They seem connected to who he really is. I like watching him, and there is no one better at turning an awkward moment into something very funny.

Oh yeah, I'd love to be a comedian. I've done a lot, but always in the confines of plays.

[Adoption] could turn you into an exquisite comedian. Ask Richard Pryor's ghost.

What's interesting about Laurel and Hardy is that in most comedy teams, there's a straight man, and then there's the funny guy. And with Laurel and Hardy, they're both the funny guy.

I'm not a comedy writer, I'm a comedian, so I only write stuff that I would want to say.

I don't think I've ever had a conversation with a comedian who stole except for when it's been in anger.

I always say, if I tell you a joke right now and it's funny, you laugh. Now, we set the lights, and I tell you the joke again, it's hard to find it funny the second time.

Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.

My interest in magic was kindled by Steve Martin, the comedian I'd gone to high school with.

There is always something funny going on between scenes with Adam Sandler. He's always cracking jokes and yelling at people for no reason. It's pretty funny. He'll joke around during scenes, too. When he guest-starred on 'Jessie,' there was nothing in the script that he said first take.

Habits are funny things. What's funny, or rather tragic, is that bad habits are so predictable and avoidable. Despite this, there are people by the millions who insist on acquiring habits that are bad, expensive, and create problems. The habit they weren't going to get, got them!

Reynie's fce fell. 'It's not funny, Kate.' For a moment - a fleeting moment - Kate looked desperately sad. 'Well, of course it's not funny, Reynie Muldoon. But what do you want me to do? Cry?

It's just so funny that when I was growing up, I was very much of an Australian. I just thought it was funny that there was this war, like, 'No, she's ours, she's practically a Miss Australia.' But I am a Miss Philippines.

You get to the end of something, you're laughing, you're like, 'That's funny, and that's funny,' and then you get to the end, and the credits come down, and you're like, 'That's it?! That's the whole thing?! You had me here for that?!' I just don't want to do that.

I have my website, The Ruckus, which is an Internet site, similar to the Funny or Die format, where people post funny videos. I get a chance to rate their videos; they get a chance to blog and kick it with me.

I don't think comedy is something you learn. I think it's something that's either there or it's not. When I read a script, I have to see the funny, and if I can see it's funny, it helps me to be able to transmit that.

I always thought when I was doing more melodramatic stuff like Everwood that the directors were constantly reeling me in and stopping me from being funny. I've always tried to find a funny angle on things, and 99 percent of the time, it just doesn't work.

I was just never discouraged from doing something wacky like trying to be a comedian.

I believe in fate. I didn't set out to be a comedian at first. I'm still not sure if I am or not.

I have fear of the audience and I am responsible for the scenes involving me, be it as a comedian or hero.

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.

When I say something funny, I don’t laugh, so my friends are always like, ‘Hahahahaaaa!’ so people know. When I’m not with them, I always think, This person doesn’t know I’m funny; they just think I’m a jerk.

Bette Davis had very strong opinions and was not afraid to express them. She wasn't afraid of anything that I ever saw. And she was so funny. She's just funny and she was laughing all the time.

Twitter makes you a comedian in the same way that digital cameras make you a photographer

It's funny looking at yourself. You know how it is when you look back at old pictures? It's just funny looking back at yourself walking and talking at age 14

You mostly know that you want to be funny, know that you have the desire. It's not like people who grow up beautiful and can look in the mirror and be like, I'm beautiful! Funny is more of a journey. And a desperate attempt.

I think we're in a really interesting moment for women globally just in terms of, like, historically, I think we're in an interesting moment for women. Because, it's important to remember, there have always been funny, funny women. Mae West was real funny. Marilyn Monroe was in one of the greatest comedies, Some Like It Hot, ever made. I mean, it's not like we're lacking. I just think the percentage of women in positions of power in all aspects of our culture is improving and women are standing up and demanding to be heard.

I'm best known as a stand-up comedian, but I'm a good actor in the right role.

It's funny looking at yourself. You know how it is when you look back at old pictures? It's just funny looking back at yourself walking and talking at age 14.

I feel that I'm a stand-up comedian more than anything else, that's my job.

Like every comedian, if I heard a joke that I thought would work, I used it.

I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody who was a television writer and make them funny.

A comedian's job itself is tough. But I have been lucky to have made people laugh.

Nowadays they have 12 directors and 15 producers and 30 writers. And all the writers want their lines said a certain way-which isn't necessarily funny. I mean the lines aren't necessarily so funny to begin with.