Top 1200 Funny Guy Quotes & Sayings - Page 18

I was my high school football team's captain, not because I was the guy who scored the most touchdowns, but the guy who was in the midst of every play.

I guess when I think about it, one of the things I like to dramatise, and what is sometimes funny, is someone coming unglued. I don't consider myself someone who is making the argument that I support these choices. I just think it can be funny.

You have to understand the tone of the movie, because if it's supposed to be funny, it can be funny violent like the Home Alone stuff, but you have to really understand the tone of what you're doing and make the action work for that and for the character.

People often think that you have a sense of humor because you think that life is funny. Life isn't funny at all. It's appalling and tragic.

Young guys should focus on maintaining their football position. Coaches always say the lowest guy wins. I'm a taller guy and a bigger guy, but because I'm always in a great football position is why I think I'm able to get away from guys still. It gives me a chance to recover.

Business, like life, is funny. We all go through difficult times, and we all have to face curve balls and challenges, each and every week. And we need to laugh when things are funny. If we take it all too seriously we will go mad.

Here`s a guy who says he`s a great businessman. But it seems like a lot of Trump's business is built around stiffing small businesses and workers out of what he owes them, work they`ve done. He thinks that`s cute or smart or funny to basically not pay somebody who`s done work for him and say go ahead and sue me because I`ve got more money than you and you can`t do anything about it.

Writing a funny story is one thing. But writing a funny story that inspires others to venture beyond their level of comfort in pursuit of their greater good is what makes me come alive.

Its really irritating. Even people who like my work sometimes come up to me and say, I usually dont like female comedians, but your material is great! It makes the job prospect more daunting. Funny is funny, you know?

But the main thing I don't want to be is un-funny. That's really the mandate. Just whatever we're doing, make it as funny as we can possibly make it. And believe me, if the show starts going down, we'll introduce a baby. We'll do everything that they did on `Family Ties.' I'm not afraid of that.

Neil Young is my hero. You know what that guy has been doing for the past 40 years? Making music. That's what that guy does.

I moved to New York and went to a performing arts college, but it wasn't until UCB that I started performing on the regular, figuring out how I'm funny, why I'm funny, and how to play with an audience.

The guy that made me wanna make movies... and this is off the wall-is a guy named Michael Pal, the British director.

You want everyone to be great and funny. I'm not saying I'm great, but I'm funny.

I don't hate humanity and I'm not interested in people who do. Although, it's funny, actually, some of my favorite writers really do. Like Martin Amis. My dirty secret. 'London Fields' is one of my favorite books ever. And it's indefensible! But he's so funny... I forgive him everything.

I got to play a funny part [in the The Master Of Disguise]. There was one thing my character did that involved flatulence and laughing at the same time - that was in the script - and that was basically what sold me on it. I really thought, "This can't help but be funny." And when I saw the film, I was proud that I'd had those moments.

I'm a pretty deep guy. I'm not a tough guy at all. People think I give this persona that I'm thick-skinned, but I'm not and when I'm writing songs, that comes out.

My father, he was a strong guy, a handsome guy, and a hard worker. I don't believe he ever missed a day of work in his life.

As an actor of color, I was overlooked at every possible opportunity. I was given roles that were almost not roles. It was, like, Scared Asian Guy. Whether I was a scared Asian guy in front of a computer or a scared Asian guy getting robbed in the grocery store, I always played these pathetic, low-status characters.

When we were younger, my cousins used to jump in front of cars with masks on and start dancing really funny or making funny moves and the people in the cars would start laughing.

You talk about a guy like Rex Tillerson, right? I don't know what the guy makes at ExxonMobil, but it's one of the top companies in the world.

I love hearing about bad behavior. It's just so funny to me. Especially, grown ups acting like weird, inconsolable babies over really stupid things, to me, is really funny.

Gone are the days when Virgin Records was owned by Richard Branson, a fan of music. Now they're all owned by some guy who bought it off some guy who bought it off some guy who wants a return on his investment.

It's really irritating. Even people who like my work sometimes come up to me and say, 'I usually don't like female comedians, but your material is great!' It makes the job prospect more daunting. Funny is funny, you know?

Despite being the greatest, Messi is an ordinary guy. He speaks like a normal guy, he acts like a normal guy. As a normal person, he has family, day-to-day problems in his life, friends and family, the usual.

I'm definitely not a muscle builder or a guy that's interested in being a muscle builder. It feels good to get back down to a normal size. Not like a hipster size or a buff-guy size, but just a normal, 34-waist guy.

Well, I never seen one guy take so much trouble for another guy. I just like to know what your interest is.

The wonderful thing about rock music is even if you hate the other person, sometimes you need him more, you know. In other words if he's the guy that made that sound, he's the guy that made that sound, and without that guy making that sound, you don't have a band, you know.

I want to be one of the guys, but I also want to be 'the' guy, the guy that can go out there and they can rely on in crunch time. I'm going to be the guy that they know will show up every day, every game, every play and show up on a consistently great level.

When I was twenty-five, I went on exactly four dates with a much older guy whom I'll call Peter Parker. I'm calling him Peter Parker because the actual guy's name was also alliterative, and because, well, it's my book and I'll name a guy I dated after Spider-Man's alter ego if I want to.

I detest jokes - when somebody tells me one, I feel my IQ dropping; the brain cells start to disappear. But something is funny when the person delivering the line doesn't know it's funny or doesn't treat it as a joke. Maybe it comes from a place of truth, or it's a sort of rage against society.

As a rule people don't think other people on drugs are funny. They think they are tragic. They have a point, but I still had the funny.

Hollywood constantly wants to label you and type you into a certain category, 'Oh he's a comedy guy,' or the weirdo character guy or the villain.

I just think [Gangster Party Line] is funny and stupid and all the dudes in it are real dudes. It's just a funny construction.

I love when guys are funny. I love guys that are funny and goofy and over the top. And you know, I really like personality. I do.

I was funny around my family. My family, they're pretty funny, too.

I was a professional rehab/workout guy for four years. I wasn't even a basketball player - just a guy who got paid to exercise.

Most people don't remember the guy from 'The Real World.' They know the guy who is a professional, a father, and a friend that gives great advice.

I'd love to do a comedy. I always told myself that I don't have funny bones, and then I was working with Dervla Kirwan in 'Uncle Vanya,' and she was like, 'Lara, you're really, really funny.' And I realised I am, and that's not even me blowing my own trumpet.

Donald [Driver] is a good guy, a righteous guy. I have no beef with him. But I have multiple sources on this; people not connected with one another who verified it.

I do think funny is like sexy. You're either funny and sexy, or you're not.

I didn't want to take the typical action roles that everybody was expecting me to take, because I was going to get typecast as that guy, the action guy who didn't have anything really bright to say and who just kicked in doors and punched people in the face and shot people and drove off in a cool car. I didn't want to be that guy.

I know a lot of funny people in a lot of funny places.

My mom let me kind of run free and be rowdy. She encouraged it. I'm a youngest child. So I was spazzy and trying to be funny to my older sisters. It's kind of my role in the family - tension reliever. I was funny or annoying, depending on your perspective.

As an actor you get categorized by other people, but it's not like I arrange myself into comedy mode or serious mode. If it's good writing you just have to play it true - if it's funny, it's funny. But obviously you don't want it to be amusing if you're playing Hedda Gabler!

I used to like Barbra Streisand films. It was Funny Girl that really turned me on, in a sense, to acting. I remember it specifically being a rainy Saturday afternoon. I couldnt play football, so I stayed in, and I watched Funny Girl.

My fans are so funny, they make me laugh so much. I've got some really, really, funny, clever fans.

A Hall of Famer isn't just the guy who put up great numbers. It's the guy who has changed the sport for the better, who has had an impact.

Vicodin, I got addicted to that little pill. The reason I dont talk about it too much in the press is because it isnt funny, and I love to be funny in interviews. If you joke about that period in your life, it doesnt seem right.

In junior high, there were a lot of really ugly guys who were popular because they made people laugh. I was like, "Wow, comedy is the great freer of hideous people." It was an incredibly liberating thing. If you ask a girl, "What do you want in a guy?" 99 percent are like, "I just want him to be funny." I thought, "If that applies to women, I'm set.

I think the second you think that you're funny is when you stop being funny.

A character on screen that's the 'good guy' or the 'bad guy,' they're never interesting. There's got to be an internal struggle, the duality is important to find.

When you do comedy in front of an audience, they are the ones who tell you whether it's funny or not and which bits are funny and which bits need to be fixed.

I want to be known as a funny comic not just a funny Latino comic. I want to be able to go everywhere and anywhere.

I am funny, but I'm not about funny... I'm about peace & justice.

I'm old school. I'm not the fastest guy or the quickest guy.

All you have in comedy, in general, is just going with your instincts. You can only hope that other people think that what you think is funny is funny. I don't have an answer but I just try to plough straight ahead.

I was always rewarded for being funny. I liked being funny.

Laughter... is like a hurricane: once it reaches a certain point, it becomes self-feeding, self-supporting. You laugh not because the jokes are funny but because your own condition is funny.

My uncle is so funny - Don Vito. He was always fat with the craziest voice. Dude, he barely speaks English; it's just full-blown jibber-jabber. It's so funny to watch on TV because you really need subtitles because you can't understand him.