Top 1200 Funny Wedding Toast Quotes & Sayings - Page 2

When the talks about our wedding began, I had asked him, which color he would want my bridal attire to be, and he had replied, Jade'. So, I ensured that was the color of my wedding lehenga.

When you go to a restaurant, sometimes you want to go to Heston Blumenthal's where you hear the sound of the sea while you're eating one tiny thing for a hundred quid. And then sometimes you just want toast. You just. Want. To eat. Toast. Sometimes you have to be okay with the fact that in terms of comedy, I'm just like, maybe, 'chips and a side.'

How can you analyse what is funny? What's funny to one isn't funny to another... What's funny to you is a personal thing.

I'm wondering how someone who goes around wearing a wedding ring succeeded in the dating pool. Normally a wedding ring sends a flashing "Do Not Enter" message - except to those looking for flings with married people.

Come on, planning a wedding, let's be honest, it's not fun. It's not fun being in a wedding.

I actually have sang at a wedding before! My old hairdresser from New Jersey, I sang at her wedding.

So I would like my wedding day to be low-key. And maybe I would not wear a wedding dress but something chic and simple, like vintage Chanel.

I do not want my man to be exhausted for our wedding day, especially our wedding night.

Personally, my daughter's wedding gave me a tremendous pleasure. And the wedding was a radiant event and I enjoyed it. I was afraid I'd cry. I'm given to crying at odd times, and I was very much afraid of the emotionalism of that moment, but I didn't even come close to crying.

I've chosen my wedding ring large and heavy to continue forever. But exactly because of that all the time that Dave and I have an argument I feel it like handcuffs, and on anger time I throw it in a basket. Poor Dave, he bought me three wedding rings already!

Planning my wedding and stuff, there's going to be reasons why people weren't there and nobody knows about why they're not going to be at my wedding.

The interesting thing about gay people is that you can't really put on a wedding without them. They're the ones who make your dress, and do the flowers and the catering. They've toiled in the wedding industry all these years but were never allowed to do it themselves.

When you don't have a laugh track, you can make the clothes funny. We can make a sign funny. We can make the way somebody walks funny. The makeup can be funny.

Comedy is just an unspoken language. Everybody understands it. Funny is funny. When it's not funny, they'll let you know.

I always was a funny guy, the class clown. I had a very funny dad and an extremely funny grandmother.

You know, Lincoln was funny. I don't think F.D.R. was very funny. But Lincoln was funny. Lincoln was really funny. But I think you should get elected first, and then show that you're funny.

My wedding preparations were done. My wedding outfit was ready. I had even bought my jewellery, and the cards were also printed. It is very sad that I had to call off my marriage one month prior to the actual date.

Shakespeare - it's not funny. No matter how they try to make Shakespeare funny, when it's meant to be funny it's not funny.

You can't fake comedy. You can't make it look beautiful or put an interesting bit of music on in the background: funny can only be funny if you're funny.

We are all trained by Disney to believe that the wedding is the finish line, but the wedding is just another starting line. In light of this fact, we should quit the huge, fancy, debt-inducing weddings.

When I auditioned for 'Wedding Crashers,' the producers had never seen any of my other work except for Bond. I got 'Wedding Crashers' partly because I was a Bond girl.

I am much more likely to care about someone trying to be funny and give them some credit for whatever he or she did that was remotely funny than I am to be mused by somebody declaring this isn't funny, that isn't funny, this sucks. If you want to write humor, you're going to have to get used to that.

I've never crashed a wedding. When I was a kid I, of course, used to crash parties. Crashing a wedding is difficult though because you have to have the suit, and you have to have information in case someone catches you. You have to know at least some names and something.

When I was little, I watched a lot of Disney movies - so I always imagined a big fairytale wedding as a kid. But when marriage became real, I felt an intimate wedding with close family and friends would be better.

Bryan Cranston is generous, he's funny. When we did a wedding scene [in The Infiltrator ], at the end of the movie with a big set piece, he put the veil off the bride, he put it on, he pretended like we were getting married, he's just a goof.

Fantasies can be great, but we shouldn't make the wedding a fantasy, because the wedding is the gateway to married life. It shouldn't be a moment of illusion; it should be a moment of preparation.

One second here and there will make all the difference between something being funny and not being funny. That's why I like going, 'Well, we wrote that six months ago, and it was funny one time we read it, but it's not funny anymore. So what? Just dump it.'

Thery're both iron, isn't that funny?" "Funny haha or funny strange?" James handed them back to me "Funny 'occult'" "Ah. Funny strange" James looked at me sternly, "Don't start that. I'm supposed to be the humorous one

I really did put up all my wedding pictures on my website. And I swear to you, my wedding pictures got downloaded just as much as my bikini pictures.

I didn't know if I could be funny on stage or write a joke. But I saw that there are no rules. If you're funny offstage, you can figure out a way to be funny onstage.

There's been a lot of wedding songs and proposals. It's cool because when they play it at weddings so, it means a lot to them. That's a big deal. They're always going to remember 'Head Over Boots' as played at their wedding.

I have been known to, on more than one occasion, look down my nose at items I deem to be tacky wedding fare... carnations, tulle, DIY invitations. And yet, the wedding I'm most embarrassed of having planned, the one I'd never put into my portfolio, is my own.

I thought my family was really funny. Everybody in my family was funny. My mom and dad both have great senses of humor and really saw the funny in stuff, so I think that's probably where it came from. I always try to see the funny in things.

When I planned my wedding the first time, my ex-husband and I, we were both struggling comics. I had a TV show that had gotten cancelled. Basically, I rented a wedding gown; the reception hall smelled like feet.

I used to think a wedding was a simple affair. Boy and girl meet, they fall in love, he buys a ring, she buys a dress, they say I do. I was wrong. That's getting married. A wedding is an entirely different proposition.

You see a lot of comedic content that's not funny, and you can tell that it's supposed to be funny, but it's actually not funny.

I'd want it to be really special to both of us, but I'm a huge fan of 'At Last' as a wedding song. But what's also really cool is songs that no one else would have at their wedding, like an obscure Radiohead song.

I'm not offended. Lenny Bruce taught me that everything's funny. You can make everything funny. I don't think that assassinations are funny, I don't think you can make fun of ISIS, but almost everything is funny. And If we can't laugh at ourselves, who can we laugh at? So I don't mind ethnic humor. I like ethnic humor. I like dialect jokes. Laughter is a very subjective thing. If it's funny to you it's funny. And a lot of things are funny to me.

I'm a very funny man, so funny comes natural. And if you want to create horror, you need to be funny or campy.

I cannot stand when you go to a wedding and get fed tiny portions. I want everyone to have a good feed on my wedding day, so I plan on having several types of sausage, mash, and gravy up for grabs. Every guest will have a Yorkshire pudding, too!

I wanted to do work that elevated. Otherwise, it's cheap funny. It's dirty funny. It's degrading funny.

I was funny in a way that was not dissing the teacher; I was funny just to be funny. A real charmer with a prominent mustache that he didn't know what to do with and a smart-alecky attitude.

It's really easy to be funny. You get a lot of funny people in a room, the show is funny.

In the Mexican culture, we never miss a baptism, a birthday, a baby shower, a wedding shower, a wedding. You must show up. Otherwise, you'll be in big trouble.

The day of my wedding, I got a FedEx in the mail. It was my termination papers. I was fired... on my wedding day.

In 1996, the players at the VSB tournament in Amsterdam sent me a card for my wedding with this dedication, 'Anand congrats on your wedding. You were a great player, now be ready to lose 50 points'.

Sometimes, no matter how screwed up things seem, I feel like we're all at a wedding. But you can't just come out and say, We're at a wedding! Have some cake! You need to create a world into which we can enter, a world where we can see this.

I moved to New York to do theater, and I got cast in a play that was funny, and then I was the funny guy. I did a movie that was funny, and then I was the funny guy.

I'm not funny. People assume that because my books are funny, I'll be funny in real life. It's the inevitable disappointment of meeting me.

My friends asked me to be a reverend at their wedding in France a few years ago. I went on the Internet, and within 15 seconds, I was printing out a certificate which allowed me to officiate at their wedding.

That word 'funny' always makes me feel uncomfortable. Because if I were trying to be funny, I would be something like Bill Wegman - he really tries to be funny. I don't try to be funny. It's just that I feel the world is a little bit absurd and off-kilter, and I'm sort of reporting.

When Joe and I got married two years ago, we were both super strictly Paleo and we were shredded for the wedding! All of our wedding pictures consequently turned out fantastic. I wish I could say I was as thin now as I was then!

A man's got two shots for jewelry: a wedding ring and a watch. The watch is a lot easier to get on and off than a wedding ring.

One of the greatest things I've ever seen happen was the morning I opened the newspaper and it said that some very powerful government officials had decided to change the name of “french fries” to “freedoom fries” and “french toast” to “freedom toast”. It was impressive. I wanted to write a letter to them just to thank them, just for proving globally that they were absolute imbeciles.

Right now the tabloids are saying I'm pregnant, and they're naming the baby. It's hilarious. I don't know when I'll want to get married. I never pictured myself as a bride, but after my sister's wedding,I did start thinking about what kind of wedding I'd want. I don't think I want a big one.

It's a funny thing when you finally have an excuse to get all of your favorite people from all corners of the globe together in one room for my wedding. Other than saying 'I do' to my hunky Englishman, that is the thing I am most excited about!

One time when somebody showed up in a wedding dress, but I never knew if it was a joke, or she was serious. She asked me to marry her. She was serious. It was pretty funny.

Builders, raise the ceiling high, Raise the dome into the sky, Hear the wedding song! For the happy groom is near, Tall as Mars, and statelier, Hear the wedding song!

I did not get into a fistfight with my father at my sister's wedding. My sister didn't have a wedding.

It's like the smell of burned toast. You made the toast. You looked forward to it. You even enjoyed making it, but it burned. What were you doing? Was it your fault? It doesn't matter anymore. You open the window, but only the very top layer of the smell goes away. The rest remains around you. It's the walls. You leave the room, but it's on your clothes. You change your clothes, but it's in your hair. It's on the thin skin on the tops of your hand. And in the morning, it's still there.