Top 606 Humorous Valentine Quotes & Sayings

The humorous story is American, the comic story is English, the witty story is French. The humorous story depends for its effect upon the manner of the telling;the comic and the witty story upon the matter.

...it is not necessary to the child to awaken to the sense of the strange and humorous by giving a man a luminous nose...to the child it is sufficiently strange and humorous to have a nose at all.

Good morrow, 'tis Saint Valentine's Day, All in the morn betime, And I a maid at your window, To be your valentine.

Valentine's Day is one of those tricky celebrations where you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. If you love it, you're buying into a holiday created to sell greeting cards, bad bouquets, and shoddy love-themed stuffed animals. And if you're opposed to it, you're considered lonely and single and have clearly never had a valentine.

'Everwood' I think provides a unique feeling, an emotional experience. And other shows on TV don't have the acting talent to do that. Each one of our actors can do a serious scene and a humorous scene, and can do it all within the same sequence. They can go from a heartbreaking moment to a humorous moment.

Valentine's day has gotten blown way out of proportion. Valentine's Day just used to be for your girlfriend or your wife but now everyone's like 'Oh, happy valentine's day!' I even got a Valentine's Day card from my grandmother. How ridiculous is that? We stopped having sex years ago!

The 99 Cent Only Store is calling itself your Valentine's Day headquarters. Guys, if that's your Valentine's Day headquarters, you can also call the garage your new home.

Although the traditional focus of Valentine's Day is on women and the gifts they desire, this survey found that not only do men like to get gifts for Valentine's Day, but they also like those gifts to be luxurious. Sixty-three percent of the people we surveyed agreed that this Valentine's Day, Johnnie Walker Blue Label is a great gift for the men in their lives.

Hugo attacked me." Clary tried not to wince as the astringent liquid stung her wounds. Hugo?" Luke blinked. Hodge's bird. I think it was his bird, anyway. Maybe it was Valentine's." Hugin," Luke said softly. "Hugin and Munin were Valentine's pet birds. Their names mean 'Thought' and 'Memory.'" Well they should mean 'Attack' and 'Kill,'" said Clary. "Hugo almost tore my eyes out.

As Luke knelt down beside his corpse, Clary couldn’t help but remember what he had said about having loved Valentine once, about having been his closest friend. Luke, she thought with a pang. Surely he couldn’t be sad — or even grieved? But then again, perhaps everyone should have someone to grieve for them, and there was no one else to grieve for Valentine.

I hate Valentine's Day. I think every day should be a day of romance. Then, on Valentine's Day, you should get to tell whoever you hate that you cannot stand them. There would be one day of hating, and 364 days of love.

It goes Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day. Is that fair to anyone who's alone? These are all days you gotta be with someone. And if you didn't get around to killing yourself at Christmas or New Year's, boom! There's Valentine's Day. I think there should be one more after Valentine's Day just called, 'Who could love you?'

We never do Valentine's dinner, because everybody, they look. On Valentine's, imagine me and David going to a restaurant! Like, everybody's going to say, 'Did they talk? Did they hold hands?' Twenty years. We've been married twenty years!

I'm just trying to portray what I find ironic or humorous.

All genuinely intellectual work is humorous.

Humorists are not humorous twenty-four hours a day. In fact, when you get to know them well, they are often not humorous at all. They tend to be hypersensitive, taut, neurotic creatures driven by God know what obscure compulsion to earn their living the hard way.

I'm anti-Valentine's Day. I don't believe - and this goes for anybody - your man shouldn't love you for one day out of 365. He should love you 365 days out of the year. I want Valentine's Day every day.

Even in the very beginning when she would bump into George Valentine and people would start taking pictures of her, she never thought "I'm with George Valentine. I need to get a picture with him." She's like "oh that's funny. Everyone's taking pictures!"

Valentine's Day is my favorite holiday.

Happy Valentine's Day! And if this is news to you, my guess is you're probably alone. Valentine's Day is often times a, well, it's a manufactured day that really doesn't mean anything.

Then you're dead, too, sweet little sister.' Oh, yes,' said Valentine. 'They'll believe that. "I didn't know it would kill Andrew. And when he was dead, I didn't know it will kill Valentine too.

Valentine's Day is the poet's holiday.

There were two main points I wanted to get across in Valentine, the first being that yes, Valentine's Day is an arbitrary day, but why would you not take that excuse to celebrate love? The second point. . .since it is just an arbitrary day. . .why not treat every day like Valentine's Day?

I don't really care too much about Valentine's Day... I've never had a valentine or anything. I've always just spent it with my friends, so I don't really have much expectation for Valentine's Day.

Galentine's Day is the day before Valentine's Day. People sometimes think, 'Oh, it's a replacement for Valentine's Day.' But it's not. You can celebrate Galentine's and Valentine's. And it comes from the sitcom 'Parks And Recreation'... Amy Poehler's character created this holiday because she wanted a day to celebrate her girlfriends.

Any guy hates Valentine's Day. Even if you're in love, you can't win on Valentine's Day. If you're married, you can't win on Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day is like the thing you want to avoid at all costs.

If you can believe it, Hollywood wanted to change my birthdate. I was born after Valentine's Day, so they wanted to change it to February 14. A Latin lover should be born on Valentine's Day. I said no.

I don't think I've ever had a bad Valentine's Day, I mean... c'mon, y'all know I never get a bad Valentine. Nah. Um, no, I've never really had - I don't have a bad Valentine's Day. I never really think... it doesn't come up to my mind.

Is Valentine's Day a day to make cupcakes with your children? No, Valentine's is supposed to be a day about romantic love.

Don't have Valentine this year, but all of you guys are mine

I'm really interested in the link between creativity and humor because humor is a type of creativity, and I do think that humorous people and humorous health helps creativity.

Valentine's Day is a sham created by card companies to reinforce gender stereotypes. [..] I'll buy some cookies, but NOT for Valentine's Day. These cookies celebrate the February 14th birthday of Anna Howard Shaw, famed American suffragette.

Valentine's Day is much more of a holy day of obligation for a guy in a relationship with a woman, because a woman has certain emotional expectations. Even if she doesn't value Valentine's Day, or views it as a corporate exercise, she still often wants her boyfriend or husband to go through the motions, just in case she values it.

I'm not really a fan of Valentine's Day. I think it can be romantic doing nothing on Valentine's Day. It's more romantic than being given a big bunch of flowers that everyone else is doing.

I think that Valentine's Day is only as good as you want it to be. You know, I don't think it should be anything fancy, nothing crazy. As long as you're spending time with that person that's special, I think that's a great Valentine's Day.

Dear Valentine, I love you. Whoever you are.

New Year's Eve to Valentine's Day is our peak season, and in many ways, Valentine's Day is our Christmas. Everybody in the world makes the same three New Year's resolutions: health, career and money, and love.

Raziel's sixty feet tall?" "Actually, he's only fifty-nine feet tall, but he likes to exaggerate," said Magnus. Isabelle clicked her tongue in annoyance. "Valentine raised an angel in his cellar. I don't see why you need all this space - " "Because Valentine is just WAY MORE AWESOME than me.

Valentine's Day's not for men.

It was February sixth: eight days until Valentine's Day. I was dateless, as usual, deep in the vice grip of unrequited love. It was bad enough not having a boyfriend for New Year's Eve. Now I had to cope with Valentine datelessness, feeling consummate social pressure from every retailer in America who stuck hearts and cupids in their windows by January second to rub it in.

There's a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.

You have a dark heart in you, Valentine's daughter.

I like Valentine's Day. It's fun.

Look at Gleason in The Honeymooners. He was humorous but the way he lived wasn't really humorous. He was a bus driver. Who wants to be a bus driver? He didn't have any money and he was not famous. But despite that, the show is humorous.

The only time Valentine's Day has any bearing on my life is when I'm dating someone, or if I'm in a relationship. I would call Valentine's Day the path of least resistance. If I buy you gifts, take you out to dinner, then you won't bust my balls. That is Valentine's Day in a nutshell.

The profoundly humorous writers are humorous because they are responsive to the hopeless, uncouth, concatenations of life.

The only thing that can break a piece of Valentine candy is another piece of Valentine candy.

Even in the very beginning when she would bump into George Valentine and people would start taking pictures of her, she never thought, 'I'm with George Valentine. I need to get a picture with him.' She's like 'oh that's funny. Everyone's taking pictures!'

My valentine is always my dad.

When I was young, we didn't celebrate February 14. For us, Valentine's Day meant Saraswati Puja. And just a single day in a year can't be Valentine's Day.

The world is an infinitely fascinating, tragic and humorous place.

I can't even tell you what else I imagined. I can only humiliate myself to such a degree; at a certain point it becomes humorous, and this story is not meant to be humorous. This story is meant to winch your ribs open and tamper with your heart. This story is meant to make you realize that your chances of happiness in this world are terribly slim if you lack a fine imagination.

Mother's Day is a torment if your mother is dead. Valentine's Day is a torment if you don't got one. And at some point in our lives, we will be tormented by Valentine's Day even if we're relatively lucky in love.

The only bubble in the flat champagne of February is Valentine’s Day. It was no accident that our ancestors pinned Valentine’s Day on February’s shirt: he or she lucky enough to have a lover in frigid, antsy February has cause for celebration, indeed.

I have a humorous side but these days humour can be a risky thing.

When you wake up and see the whole creation is my valentine, the country is my valentine, the Divinity is my valentine, knowledge is my valentine then Valentine’s Day will never end for you. All 365 days is Valentine’s Day. That is how I feel - everyday is Valentine’s Day

I love Valentine's Day. When you're a kid everyone gets a Valentine. It's like 'TO TIM, NICE PANTS, LOVE SCOTT'. It's Valentines galore!

I've always tried to explore the humorous aspects of life.

People love in different ways. You may have a man who brings you flowers every Monday but doesn't give two hooty-hoots about Valentine's Day. Just because he doesn't give you a valentine doesn't mean he doesn't love you!

I am drawn to humorous art that is ironic.