Top 1200 Marriage Jokes Quotes & Sayings - Page 14

Plenty of the women who were single in the nineteenth century wrote about their desire to evade marriage. Marriage was scary in a lot of ways. It often involved having a lot of kids, losing your autonomy, being in service to a husband and children who were often born at an unremitting pace without the benefit of modern medicine.

I am constantly the butt of jokes.

They're just jokes, people. They can't all be funny.

I prefer sayings over jokes.

These jokes the world plays, they're not funny at all.

You shouldn't make jokes if it makes you so unhappy.

I support and have always supported passage of a federal constitutional amendment that defines marriage as a union between one man and one woman. As President, I will fight for passage of this amendment. My personal belief is that marriage is between one man and one woman, for life.

A civil servant doesn't make jokes.

That's what my books are, now that I'm a grownup - mosaics of jokes.

I like jokes where people don't stop laughing.

I've always been the kind of person that if I take on anything professionally it means commitment to me, so you take it on if you can commit to it and if you know you can accommodate and give your best to it and that's what you do, and I have always done that throughout my life - before marriage, after marriage, before motherhood, after motherhood.

I'm a joke comic. I tell jokes.

I come up with my jokes by thinking of a topic.

I think part of being human is jokes.

Neil Hamburger writes such cutting jokes.

I'm an environmentalist. Most of my jokes are recycled.

Fart jokes still work for me.

I love to write jokes and that's all I think about.

For jokes as well as justice come in with speech.

I love making jokes on the Internet.

I am the first one to go to university in my family. I am the first writer as well. My dad is a retired policeman, and my mom works for a glass-processing company. She is health-and-safety manager, and my stepfather is a plumber. I have four half siblings, one from my mom's marriage and three from my dad's marriage, so we are kind of scattered.

No pickup lines! They're the worst. But I love jokes.

Even the gods love jokes.

I tell the most horrible jokes.

I love the cat-lady jokes.

jokes are used to hide the truth!

Our national media refuses to report that even the Supreme Court did not say marriage was a human right in all cases nor did it say that the heterosexual definition violated anyone's right or that the heterosexual definition of marriage was unconstitutional.

Be nice to everyone and tell jokes.

I tell very mean jokes.

Jokes are very curious things psychologically.

I'm really bad at writing jokes.

I don't do politics, I don't do religion, I don't do ethnic jokes.

The older you get, the funnier fart jokes are.

Eazy always had jokes.

The wind likes making jokes!

It's fun to pick the worst jokes you can think of.

Legalizing gay marriage is not about making it possible for gay people to become couples. It's about giving the Left the power to force anti-religious values on our children. Once they legalize gay marriage, it will be the bludgeon they use to make sure that it becomes illegal to teach traditional values in the schools.

Loveless marriages are horrible. But there is one thing worse than an absolutely loveless marriage. A marriage in which there is love, but on one side only; faith, but on one side only; devotion, but on one side only, and in which of the two hearts one is sure to be broken.

I think anything is possible if the jokes are good.

Either over neither, both over either/or, live-and-let-live over stand-or die, high spirits over low, energy over apathy, wit over dullness, jokes over homilies, good humor over jokes, good nature over bad, feeling over sentiment, truth over poetry, consciousness over explanations, tragedy over pathos, comedy over tragedy, entertainment over art, private over public, generosity over meanness, charity over murder, love over charity, irreplaceable over interchangeable, divergence over concurrence, principle over interest, people over principle.

Comedy has bits, has jokes, has stories, and it has characters.

As for jokes, I don't think it's necessarily that what I write is funny.

I'm proud that I don't make crazy jokes anymore.

Another day gone and no jokes.

We've all been the brunt of jokes at times.

You don't make stupid jokes in art.

I keep cracking jokes a lot.

I'm still proud of a lot of my jokes when I started.

I got all sorts of great Nebraska jokes.

Sometimes my jokes are meant to be tasteless.

Most of my jokes are racist - usually about the Irish.

But just now, he'd gotten on his knees and proposed marriage, like in a television commercial for a diamond ring. Except of course they had the roll of duct tape instead, which, when you came to think about it, was a far more practical item. Such a bad mistake it would be, to embark on marriage and adult life without a nice supply of duct tape.

God's jokes are the soul's curriculum.

Fate does not play jokes.

I'm a plethora of stolen jokes and kitschy references.

I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.

You can't just yell jokes at people.

I don't really know jokes. I'm just in on the joke.

I can't crack jokes because I don't have any.

A world is in flames, and you are cracking silly jokes.