Top 1200 Marriage Jokes Quotes & Sayings - Page 5

Attaching the word marriage to the association of same-sex individuals mistakenly presumes that marriage is principally a matter of adult benefits and adult rights. In fact, marriage is principally about the nurturing and development of children. And the successful development of children is critical to the preservation and success of our nation.

We do not create marriage from scratch. Instead, in the elegant language of the marriage ceremony, we 'enter into the holy estate of matrimony.'

Well, marriage doesn't function in the way it used to in terms of deciding our fate, but it's in our heads, and it determines a lot of our actions. Like, right now, if you think about gay marriage - and they just started having the first gay marriages in New York - it shows what a potent idea marriage remains for people.

Giving public sanction to homosexual marriage ends up redefining marriage, and it's certain to harm children.

Marriage is built around complementarity of the sexes, and therefore the institution of marriage is a support for stable families and societies.

Gay marriage won't be more of an issue 25 years from now than interracial marriage is today.

Marriage is built around complementarity of the sexes and therefore the institution of marriage is a support for stable families and societies.

Sometimes, comics will make the observation that it's not jokes that are funny, it's characters that are funny. And isn't that true! That's why I always kill jokes. I'm terrible at them, because I get the joke right, but I can't get the character right, and it just goes down like a lead balloon.

Civil union is less than marriage. Marriage is a sacred and valued institution and ought to be afforded equal protection.

What a good thing there is no marriage or giving in marriage in the after-life; it will certainly help to smooth things out.

I always thought it was important to overdeliver, and when I got one of my first jobs, writing jokes for Garry Shandling when he was hosting the Grammys, I stayed up all night and wrote a hundred jokes, and I thought, "I'm always going to be the person that gives them more than they requested, and that's why they'll want to keep me around."

Some comedians tell nice jokes that you can tell to your kids. Some use bad words - they work 'blue.' If you don't want to hear a joke that's blue, you shouldn't go to a comedy club where a comedian who makes blue jokes is performing.

Marriage is a partnership between one man and one woman... Nothing could be clearer in the Bible as to what constitutes a marriage in God's sight.

Marriage requires the giving and keeping of confidences, the sharing of thoughts and feelings, respect and understanding always, marriage requires humility - the humility to repent, the humility to forgive. Marriage requires flexibility (to give and take) and firmness: not to compromise principles. And a wise and moderate sense of humor. Both need to be pulling together in the same direction.

To me, the highest expression of life is art with jokes. It's very rarified, very difficult to accomplish if you want to be more than just funny, and more than just jokes about human gaseousness.

Christian marriage is marked by discipline and self-denial...C hristianity does not therefore depreciate marriage, it sanctifies it.

Those who condemn gay marriage, yet are silent or indifferent to the breakdown of marriage and divorce, are, in my view, missing the real issue.

I'm totally against straight marriage - even though I'm married. I don't think heterosexual marriage is any of the government's business.

My poems... the ones that start out as jokes become these big ponderous things and the ones that start out ponderous devolve into jokes.

The institution of marriage has been something that - we have a very temperamental relationship, marriage and I. I've seen a lot of not great examples of it.

I had a marriage that I came to in the same way everybody else comes to a marriage. We all take chances when we get married.

Being able to support oneself allows one to choose a marriage out of love and not just economic dependence. It also allows one to risk that marriage.

We are wide open and vulnerable and in all likelihood an activist judge will strike down our Defense of Marriage Act, our state law against gay marriage, this year. And in all likelihood, we will have gay marriage in 2004 in Minnesota , if we don't get this amendment on the ballot for November.

Granted, there's been mistakes made immaturely, but a marriage is a marriage.

Once you're in a room like '30 Rock,' it's a creative setting, so you write more even after you go home, just because you're still in that mode of coming up with jokes. So the job wasn't sapping standup jokes, but it was sapping stand up time and energy, and I wouldn't be able to travel as much.

Marriage is very difficult. Marriage is like a five-thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky.

I think it's very important that we protect marriage as an institution between a man and a woman. I proposed a constitutional amendment. The reason I did so was because I was worried that activist judges are actually defining the definition of marriage. And the surest way to protect marriage between a man and woman is to amend the Constitution.

By marriage the husband and wife are one person in law, that is, the very being or legal existence of the woman is suspended during marriage.

Marriage is worse than dying. Why stay with one person for fifty years? We advise against marriage.

Marriage is going to disappear, should disappear. And now the point is coming in the history of humanity where it becomes possible that marriage can disappear. It is already an outmoded phenomenon, it has lived too long and it has created nothing but misery. Marriage should disappear and love should flower again. One should live with insecurity and freedom. That I call intelligence.

I tried marriage. I'm 0 for 3 with the marriage thing. So, being a ballplayer - I believe in numbers. I'm not going 0 for 4. I'm not wearing a golden sombrero.

Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.

I think that two people who decide to live together in a marriage situation, they have an obligation to make the marriage work for them.

We have a very strong marriage. We've been together for going on 32 years. I think we have the strongest marriage I know.

I support marriage equality and oppose legislation that defines marriage as only being between a man and a woman.

Our show was - it remained - you know, kids could watch it and laugh at it. And they wouldn't know - they wouldn't get the jokes. But they would laugh at it. So they tell me now they have grown up and they're watching it. Now they get the jokes. But we didn't say anything blatant.

I think Donald Trump's interpretation of marriage is something that he himself doesn't really believe in. 'Traditional marriage' is where two people love each other, commit to each other, care for each other over the years. It is a meaningful ceremony, and his interpretation of that is not recognizing what real marriage is.

Gay marriage is a tricky issue for the Democrats due to the fact that - like taxes, defense and education - they are forced to lie about their position when running for office. In other words, Democrats are gay marriage supporters trapped in the bodies of candidates who oppose gay marriage. And no issue-reassignment surgery can help them.

I ran to my marriage, I was happily ready to take on marriage.

Every marriage is different, and it's impossible to understand your own marriage, really, much less anybody else's.

Marriage is a totally different phenomenon: it is the climax of love. Then it is good. I am not against marriage - I am for the REAL marriage. I am against the false, the pseudo, that exists. But it is an arrangement. It gives you a certain security, safety, occupation. It keeps you engaged. Otherwise, it gives you no enrichment, it gives you no nourishment.

The moral code of Heaven for both men and women is complete chastity before marriage and full fidelity after marriage.

I think that with marriages, people have to understand that you have to look at your marriage and understand what is needed in your marriage - not what people think your marriage should be or what people want your marriage to be.

Marriage is not easy, especially when it's a very public marriage. I know firsthand.

I have no idea if I will go for an arranged marriage or love marriage.

People can't help the way they feel, only what they do about it. They can no longer not be attracted to someone other than their spouse than they can say they are not hungry or not thirsty or not frightened or embarrassed. It's when you act on that attraction when you know it would be bad for your marriage that is the problem. In a good marriage, the couple are each as committed to the marriage as they are to each other.

Each marriage bears the footprints of economic and cultural trends which originate far outside marriage.

In many ways, the crumbling of the institution of marriage is the real 'war on women.' Marriage is the civilizing influence for men and for families.

Better no marriage, than a marriage short of the best.

We do not create marriage from scratch. Instead, in the elegant language of the marriage ceremony, we 'enter into the holy estate of matrimony.

Friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this marriage is liable to divorce.

Really with marriage, from what I've heard about from different friends that are married, you can't entirely be prepared. There are things you can only learn in marriage.

The State Marriage Defense Act helps safeguard the ability of states to preserve traditional marriage for their citizens.

No marriage stays in the same pattern forever. It is both the best feature of marriage and the worst, that it inevitably changes.

A storybook marriage? No, not at all. What Mitt Romney and I have is a real marriage.

There is one thing worse than an absolutely loveless marriage: a marriage in which there is love, but on one side only.

The Silly Putty-like malleability of the institution [marriage], in fact, is the only reason we still have the thing at all. Very few people... would accept marriage on it's thirteenth-century terms. Marriage survives, in other words, precisely because it evolves. (Though I suppose this would not be a very persuasive argument to those who probably also don't believe in evolution).

Marriage is not defined in the federal Constitution at all; it's a matter for the states. And applying the Fourteenth Amendment to the equality of men and women and their relationship in marriage is totally different than redefining marriage. Here is the overreach of the judiciary. This, if allowed to stand without any congressional approval, without any kind of enabling legislation, is what Jefferson warned us about. That's judicial tyranny.

Marriage is not one point of view: it's a constant back and forth over different perspectives - a healthy marriage, anyway.

To me, the highest expression of life is art with jokes. It's very rarified, very difficult to accomplish if you want to be more than just funny and more than just jokes about human gaseousness.