Top 510 Monday Quotes & Sayings

Almost every Monday I have a charity thing. I like that. I do.

If you want to understand a society, take a good look at the drugs it uses. And what can this tell you about American culture? Well, look at the drugs we use. Except for pharmaceutical poison, there are essentially only two drugs that Western civilization tolerates: Caffeine from Monday to Friday to energize you enough to make you a productive member of society, and alcohol from Friday to Monday to keep you too stupid to figure out the prison that you are living in.

'Monday Night Football' is a competitor to 'Monday Night Raw.'

Even the best weeks start with monday

Well 'Monday Night Football,' I think the players kind of like it because they like the attention, and it's a lot of attention. But on the other hand, it's a disruption of the routine we used to have to play on Monday night. If you're a player, you sit around all day waiting for a game. It's different than when you play at noon.

Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday. Because you'll be dust on Monday. Because I'll be pulverizing you sometime over the weekend. And the cleaning lady... cleans up... dust. She dusts. And she has weekends off, so... Monday. Right?

There isn't a Monday that would not cede its place to Tuesday.

Monday nights, it wasn't like, 'Mom, I want to watch Monday Night Raw.' It was like, 'Mom, put on Shawn Michaels.'

I've had so many cool moments on 'Monday Night Raw.'

Interlude with sunshine. Hello monday mein lazy freund.

The cross comes before the crown and tomorrow is a Monday morning!

'Monday Mornings' is terrific. It's my wife's show. I'm just lucky enough that David Kelley threw me a bone on it as well. It's a wonderful piece based on a novel by Dr. Sanjay Gupta called 'Monday Mornings.'

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.

This must be Monday Night RAW, we just got a Wendy's chant.

Anything goes on any given Sunday, especially Monday Night.

IN MY LIFELONG STUDY OF HUMAN BEINGS, I HAVE FOUND that no matter how hard they might try, they have found no way yet to prevent the arrival of Monday morning. And they do try, of course, but Monday always comes, and all the drones have to scuttle back to their dreary workaday lives of meaningless toil and suffering.

It's a great day for America, everybody! It's Monday, woo.

How can we worship a homeless man on Sunday and ignore one on Monday?

On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.

The Tuesday scowls, the Wednesday growls, the Thursday curses, the Friday howls, the Saturday snores, the Sunday yawns, the Monday morns, the Monday morns. The whacks, the moans, the cracks, the groans, the welts, the squeaks, the belts, the shrieks, the pricks, the prayers, the kicks, the tears, the skelps, and the yelps.

Every Monday morning is new hope.

Let us not turn schools into dumps when we go out and vote on Monday.

I arrived in Los Angeles on the Monday, had a call from my agent to say they wanted to see me for 'Dallas,' made an audition tape at my friend's house in L.A. the same day, and had the job the following Monday.

With the Monday Night Wars, it was almost a pay-per-view every single Monday between the two factions because they were trying to throw everything but the kitchen sink to win the ratings war.

How many people just get up on Monday and do the same thing they've done every single Monday - go to work and just turn on route automatic and no longer have any meaning in their life?

What we do on Sunday absolutely doesn't matter unless it meets us on Monday. Changes us on Monday. Transforms us on Monday.

I might wear a tux on Monday. Or a kimono!

It was great fun being part of a TV series that I'd been a fan of for five years. I've been watching it every single Monday when with my wife. It was like a ritual - every Monday night on HBO Nordic, we would watch 'Game of Thrones' together.

It's really exciting to be able to represent the cruiserweights and go to Monday Night Raw. I grew up watching Monday Night Raw, and it's really a big dream of mine to perform on that stage.

Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I'm a man of simple pleasures, really.

If you really want to give me advice, do it on a Saturday afternoon between one and four o'clock, when you've got 25 seconds to do it, between plays. Don't give me advice on Monday. I know the right thing to do on Monday.

I watch football all the time. I enjoy getting home on Monday nights and watch 'Monday Night Football,' and 'Sunday Night Football' when we get home early enough on Sunday nights.

I graduated on a Friday. By Monday, I was doing Shakespeare in the Park.

That's what we do as a nation, we're all Monday morning quarterbacks.

I found out - the paper used to go to bed on Tues - on Monday. I found out that on Monday nights, the editors would cut out - literally cut out passages, sometimes whole paragraphs, of some of the writers that might possibly offend blacks, lesbians, gays, radicals. And I wrote a couple of columns about that. And they're - of course, they were annoyed that I had written about it, but, I mean, it - another example - and [my wife Margot] always also conjured that.

What do sharks do on Monday mornings? They get up and start biting. That's me.

Who remembers when we used to rest on Sunday instead of Monday?

I'm a huge WWE fan, 'Monday Night RAW' especially.

Monday to Fridays I'm practically an athlete every hour of the day.

Work in a way that you look forward to Monday mornings

A schedule so tight that it would only work if I didn't sleep on Monday nights.

Most of the time, I'm here in Michigan and I'm taking out the garbage every Monday.

I learned a lot about the prep Monday through Wednesday with my coach.

Monday Night Football. That was everything to me because you get a chance to show everybody what you're capable of. It's only two teams on that Monday night.

You practice Monday through Friday in college, or Monday through Saturday in the pro's - and then you just go out and knock somebody's head off.

I could have played in a lot of Monday qualifiers for PGA Tour events, which would have been fine as long as I was getting through. But Monday qualifiers can also be depressing if you are missing out time and again.

How Sunday into Monday melts!

People can be great competitors on Sunday and mates on Monday.

The biggest thrill wasn't in winning on Sunday but in meeting the payroll on Monday.

The thing is that, not only do you learn so much about being in front of a camera and stuff being on 'Monday Night RAW,' but at the same time, I'm not really acting on 'Monday Night RAW.'

The Hamptons are filled with people who are winners Monday through Friday.

For me, the pinnacle of everything was to be on 'Monday Night Raw.'

One seventh of your life is spent on Monday.

It was a Monday and they walked on a tightrope to the sun.

Monday night, there ain't a better time to showcase your talent.

I refuse, whenever possible, to do shows on a Monday. I don't do gigs on a Monday, because nobody laughs on Mondays. Everybody wants Monday to be over. I just won't do 'em. But the rest of the time, in all honesty, it doesn't matter where you are: if something's funny, people laugh.

Training is full-on. Some days I really don't want to get out of bed and hit that track again. Sunday and Monday morning sessions are always horrible. But who really looks forward to going to work on a Monday morning?

I hate Sunday, I can't wait for Monday so I can go back to work again.

We are going to do 'Hot Tub' until we die. Every Monday. Then we'll come back and do it as zombies. 'Hot Tub' is very important. What we do is based on our live skills. It's stand-up and sketch and improv; everything we do in 'Hot Tub' is important to our jobs. And every Monday I'm excited to do it.

When life gives you Monday, dip it in glitter and sparkle all day.