Top 1200 Practical Joke Quotes & Sayings - Page 18
Explore popular Practical Joke quotes.
Last updated on April 19, 2025.
We need to get rid of the Federal Elections Commission. It's a joke. It doesn't enforce the law.
If you think about the practical difficulties of having a relationship with somebody on the other side of the world, it defies all logic.
Because of the varroa mite, wild honey bees are now, for all practical purposes, extinct in the United States.
I used to joke that I was trying to sell out, and nobody would buy me.
I think young people respond much better to openness and frankness and practical stuff than speeches.
I think what's important and extraordinarily practical about Buddhism, is that it offers very concrete methods for people to work with.
Everybody doesn't have to get every joke. People really appreciate not being condescended to.
To make intercession for men is the most powerful and practical way in which we can express our love for them.
Too many lives go up in smoke - It's nice to laugh but don't be the joke.
Life must go on, even if it's no joke...just pretend to believe in the future.
Like every comedian, if I heard a joke that I thought would work, I used it.
Let us give practical recognition to the injustices of the past,by building a future based on equality&social justice
It would be a bitter cosmic joke if we destroy ourselves due to atrophy of the imagination.
And I admit it: there's a rather dirty thrill when 700 people laugh at a joke you've written.
If I can't joke about imminent death, then I might as well just resign.
A longer time perspective is needed because we face a daunting task both in an intellectual and practical sense.
His whole personality was like an elaborate joke that he never stopped telling.
Sometimes I joke that I'm an Elizabethan who's had the misfortune to be alive during the reign of the wrong Elizabeth.
I always joke and say I want to invent a comfortable stiletto and then retire.
We were right to seek practical cooperation with Russia and to encourage its integration as a respected power into global institutions.
I don't mind being the butt of the joke... It doesn't really bother me. I quite enjoy it.
There is a standard joke in the family. Probably we should go into selling second-hand shoes.
I think what the book did in addition to its practical uses, is it gave us a more attentive way of thinking.
To me programming is more than an important practical art. It is also a gigantic undertaking in the foundations of knowledge.
Maybe I'm a product of my era, but I just enjoy the practical effects of 'The Thing' more than CGI aliens.
With age, life becomes complex and difficult, often fraught with risk on several levels, from the practical to the fiscal.
My friends joke because I will take my clothes off, at the drop of a hat.
I am convinced that love is the most durable power in the world. It is not an expression of impractical idealism, but of practical realism.
From the idea that the self is not given to us, I think there is only one practical consequence: we have to create ourselves as a work of art.
It's an ongoing joke that a black man is always the first one to get killed in movies.
Most social problems could be helped or prevented if people had more money and practical advice.
My practical approach based on experience is to create a website for real Internet users, not for search engine spiders.
When you're an older woman [in a movie] you tend to be in - how did you put it? You're the brunt of the joke.
The practical value of history is to throw the film of the past through the material projector of the present on to the screen of the future.
Limitations, be they practical or arbitrary, force artists to dig more deeply instead of settling for easy answers.
[Writing a joke] there is no team of writers. It's just you in an office, staring at yourself in the mirror.
I'm gonna fix that last joke by taking out all the words and adding new ones.
Such men as fortune raises from a mean estate to the highest elevation by way of a joke.
If you manage to joke around and charm people, it means that from inside, you are very serious.
Televison allows thousands of people to laugh at the same joke and still remain alone.
It's a lot easier, I think, to be an actor in a movie than to spin a joke on a sitcom.
I joke about it being a millstone, but it never hurts to have a name that sticks out.
What other culture could have produced someone like Hemmingway and not seen the joke?
Knowledge is the treasure of the mind, but discretion is the key to it, without which it is useless. The practical part of wisdom is the best.
Administrators and scientists are excited by buckyballs for their own sake, and if they turn out to have practical applications, so much the better.
That is how the atom is split. But what does it mean ? To us who think in terms of practical use it means - Nothing !
The purpose of this study is to offer a logical, practical, pragmatic proof of the existence of God from a purely scientific perspective.
This is the joke of me being a part of 'Lost': I haven't met three-quarters of that cast.
You can read Kant by yourself, if you wanted to; but you must share a joke with someone else.
Most practical jokes, I'll feel too bad for the other person so I'll stop just before the punchline.
The joke around my office is that I've shaken many hands, but I've petted more dogs.
I did the commencement speech at UNH in 2006, and one of the biggest jokes was a 'Guts' joke.
Implying women are too weak to take a joke is *implicitlty* sexist, and ridiculous.
If you can feel that staying human is worth while, even when it can't have any practical result whatsoever, you've beaten them.
I can never tell a joke, I've always found it easier to just fall over.
The Atonement has practical, personal, everyday value; apply it in your life. It can be activated with so simple a beginning as prayer.
The curious mind embraces science; the gifted and sensitive, the arts; the practical, business; the leftover becomes an economist
I get a kick out of replying to people on Twitter sometimes if I make a joke.
I know it's practical for career women, but sneakers with suits? Jesus couldn't possibly weep harder than I did.
If you can make it sound exciting with a joke drum machine, you know you've got something.
