Top 295 Sarcastic One Liners Quotes & Sayings

Cathedrals, luxury liners laden with souls, Holding to the east their hulls of stone.

President Reagan's one-liners were terrific.

Sarcasm is weird. Even not in acting, in life I feel 'sarcastic' is a word that people use to describe me sometimes so when I meet someone, it's almost they feel they have to also be sarcastic, but it can sometimes just come off as mean if it's not used in the right way.

Nobody expects girls to do something smart or give one liners in a film.

In my view, the pro-life movement at this point should focus on seeking to reduce the number of abortions. At times it will require political education and legal fights, at times it will require education and the establishment of alternatives to abortion, such as adoption centers. Unfortunately, such measures are sometimes opposed by so-called hard-liners in the pro-life movement. These hard-liners are fools. Because they want to outlaw all abortions, they refuse to settle for stopping some abortions; the consequence is that they end up preventing no abortions.

I said [ Barack Obama], the founder of ISIS. Obviously, I'm being sarcastic.But not that sarcastic, to be honest with you.

One-liners that must land perfectly in just the right nanosecond can be terrifying.

For other comics, it's about full-spectrum dominance, being on panel shows and having one-liners and being a good chat show guest and having a good seven minutes you can do on 'Live At The Apollo.' But I really think about these subsequent finished pieces, you know? And they don't always chop up well into one-liners and routines.

The problem with these interviews is that there's no sarcastic font.

Sarcasm doesn't read sarcastic in print.

Twitter is basically just writing a bunch of one-liners - it's a short form or whatever.

Every once in a while, friends leave sarcastic comments on photos. I know they're joking, but the sarcastic humor doesn't always translate well when I am sitting behind my screen reading it. In person, it's easier to play it off as a joke, but online, it can come across as offensive.

I'm a sarcastic, observational storyteller.

I think brilliant stuff comes out of working with limitations. One liners are very limiting, but that's what drew me to them in the first place.

My mind reels with sarcastic replies.

When you're being earnest, people think you're being sarcastic, and when you're being sarcastic, they think you're being earnest. The moral in all this, of course, is that people should never attempt to communicate.

I can be very dry and sarcastic.

very funny my sarcastic friend

I'm a sarcastic person, and people don't get my humor sometimes.

Sarcasm is weird. Even not in acting, in life I feel like 'sarcastic' is a word that people use to describe me sometimes so when I meet someone, it's almost like they feel like they have to also be sarcastic, but it can sometimes just come off as mean if it's not used in the right way.

If you go on the Internet and type in 'Lee Ryan one liners,' I think I'm on par with Gandhi.

My career will come full cycle one day when I play the father of a cute little kid missing teeth who spouts one-liners.

The exact meaning of irony is so narrow that the word is hardly worth using; in its broad, current definition, it's a euphemism for sarcasm. 'I'm not being sarcastic; I'm being ironic.' No, you're not. You're evading the responsibility for being sarcastic.

I love eye makeup. I really like doing a cat eye, playing with liquid liners and different colors of liners, like emerald and deep blues, combining them with black.

I'm kind of sarcastic. Not cynical but sarcastic.

When I was in high school I saw Steven Wright, a brilliant one-liner comedian, and I thought: 'That's what I should do; I should write one-liners.' And I did. My first album is mostly one-liners.

High-concept one-liners were huge when I got my start in the film industry.

My films often have a very strong strain of irony, or even sarcasm, which is definitely related to homosexual camp. But it is by no means straightforward: quite often I am sincere when I appear to be sarcastic, and I am sarcastic when I appear to be sincere. I also try to contradict myself at least once a day, which is a camp must.

I never said I'm not a feminist! I wrote one column where I was being sarcastic, and I called myself a 'wombist'. Now which sane person would say that 'wombist' is a better term than feminist? I was being sarcastic, and perhaps it was my fault in not getting the point across as clearly as I would have liked to. I don't think there's any doubt.

The world is cynical and sarcastic, but that doesn't mean that that's always the truth.

When you're being earnest, people think you're being sarcastic and when you're being sarcastic, they think you're being earnest. The moral in all this, of course, is that people should never attempt to communicate.

Donald [Trump], is great at - at the one-liners, but he's a chaos candidate.

Jesus was a brilliant Jewish stand-up comedian, a phenomenal improviser. His parables are great one-liners.

Geniuses are like ocean liners: they should never meet.

People that do "bits" and "jokes" or "one-liners" are going by the wayside.

Do you think it's a good idea to be sarcastic about slavery?

Endeavors that help me satisfy you, my goddess of desire, pleasure, and corny one-liners.

I can be sarcastic.

Aw, now look at that, you're being sarcastic, aren't you?

Twitter is comedy writing. It's one-liners that give way to fully fleshed-out thoughts.

I'm a sarcastic person, and people don't get my humor sometimes

Sarcastic people tend to be marshmallows underneath the armor

Sorry I’m so sarcastic. I feel really bad about it.

I'm really sarcastic. Not Morgan Webb sarcastic. She's dry, 100%. I'm different from her.

It looks to me as if Darwinians are like someone who, having observed that tugboats sometimes maneuver ocean liners in tight places by directing high-pressure streams of water at them, concludes that he has discovered the method by which the liners cross the Atlantic.

I would love to make a sarcastic film; I am so sarcastic that even my kids are now getting used to my sarcasm. You see it a lot in British comedy because that's their sense of humour.

I'm not too keen on jokes that are one-liners. I want the situation to be funny.

I have some sarcastic sides of me.

I have friends who are so sarcastic but I never view it as mean.

I played a lot of sarcastic, wisecracking characters for a long time, and people would think that was me. And it's very much not me, and then people would think I was being sarcastic when I wasn't: 'Oh, you're making fun of me right now.' And I wasn't!

I'm a sarcastic person. I learn through humor.

I can be quite sarcastic when I'm in the mood.

I'm not an evangelical, because that means that I exclude the Catholics and main-liners, and Orthodox.

I don't do one-liners, because you don't learn anything about that comedian.

I have friends who are so sarcastic, but I never view it as mean.

Small wastebasket liners, $1.17 ... tall wastebasket liners, $2.29 ... garbage can liners, $3.98 ... I think I just spent $7.44 buying something I'm going to throw away.

My brother and I both like sarcastic, insulting comedy, so that's a way we communicate. Somehow that's what we learned. My mom is not a really sarcastic person. She's a really sort of overly loving person, and my brother and I came out little cynical bastards.

Some people don't get it when I'm being sarcastic.

I became a specialist at comedic one-liners.

I definitely still like writing one-liners, but I also think that I've changed a lot in that I've allowed myself freedom to grow.