Top 1200 Smart And Funny Quotes & Sayings - Page 7

I don't like people whose job it isn't to be funny, to tell me what is and isn't funny.

I wanna be funny, but if I have a chance to make a point while being funny - why not?

No Pilar," Agustin said. "You are not smart. You are brave. You are loyal. You have decision. You have intuition. Much decision and much heart. But you are not smart.

If there's an audience, I think they're going to expect me to be funny. But what if I'm not funny? What if I fail?

I'm a prankster, so some of the - you know, I like a good joke. I think when it's funny, it's funny.

'The Simpsons' basically - and 'Futurama' - are really smart shows. They're kind of disguised as these goofy animated sitcoms, but the references within the shows, if you're paying attention, are pretty smart and pretty sophisticated.

What's funny isn't really me. What I do is point out what I find funny in others.

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy.

I'm not a broad comedy guy. I've been funny in movies, but I'm not a comedian. I'm an actor who's sometimes funny.

Comedy is not commercial; it is risky, because what is funny in one place isn't always funny somewhere else.

You can give a guy a funny line, but you can't make him say it funny.

When I was 14 or 15, a camp counselor told me I was smart. I had never been very good in school, but he told me once that I was smart but my mind operated a little differently.

Funny is only something that others know about you - you can't be funny by yourself.

There's something dangerous about what's funny. Jarring and disconcerting. There is a connection between funny and scary.

I'm always more motivated by the pain of a funny character than by what makes him funny.

Comedy is learning to be funny, and you learn to be funny in small rooms with young audiences.

People are getting careers from YouTube and uploading videos. And they're totally different - you can't necessarily be funny on a video, and then all of a sudden you're live in a theater. You don't have the tools yet. It's a lot more involved to go from being funny on a little iPhone screen to being live in front of people and being funny.

If you try to deliver a funny line in a funny way, it comes out as wacky and you ruin the scene.

We need to redefine "smart" when talking about things Obama does, 'cause in my world he doesn't do smart things. He doesn't do intelligent things or wise things. He's doing destructive things.

In grade school I was smart, but I didn't have any friends. In high school, I quit being smart and started having friends.

When I say something funny in a newspaper and I meant it to be funny, it doesn't read that way.

George Clooney is exactly what you would expect. He's annoyingly good looking, insanely funny, and super smart. So you just feel really inferior around him all the time. You end up feeling really bad about yourself, but you walk away feeling really great about George Clooney.

Robots will someday, or maybe, wake up. They may be really smart. They may be as creative, smart and capable as human beings, and fully conscious, and self discerning with free will.

The truth is really funny. It's uncomfortable sometimes, it's dramatic sometimes, but it's really funny. Life is funny.

Why do all these people want [comedians] to be serious? The reason they want that is these are people who aren't funny. Anybody funny can be serious, but people who have no sense of humor, they can never be funny - and frankly, they're jealous. There's very few comic actors. Think about it. There aren't that many. It's hard because you have to be able to do both.

There are quite a few very funny people in my life. You know those people who don't mean to be funny, they just come out with these zingers that just make you howl with laughter. Usually you find these people in the road crew. A good crew is a key to a healthy funny bone.

It's not about trying to be funny all the time. It's more of a document that hopefully is funny.

I'm not a naturally funny man. I find that I can only be funny, if I become someone else.

I've always really enjoyed sounds and alliteration and funny words and funny melodies.

To the U.S. and the world, I'm just known as some funny song and some funny music, some funny video guy. But in Korea I'm doing one of the biggest concerts; it's not a dance music concert. I'm playing with the band, so I change my every song to a rock song.

It doesn't matter how many times the audience has heard it before. If it's funny, it's funny.

It's not a secret that Ted Cruz isn't my first choice for the Republican nomination for president. His smug Poindexter affect, his smarm, sanctimony, and general derpiness all grate on me. There's no doubt he's smart, but while smart is necessary, it's not necessarily sufficient.

It's not how smart you are that matters, what really counts is how you are smart.

I do not think that obsession is funny or that not being able to stop one's intensity is funny.

My brother played the game with his friends, so I thought I was a pretty smart kid and I played this friend of mine and he just crushed me and this was Brooklyn Tech High School in Brooklyn where I still live, in Brooklyn, New York and this guy beat me so bad it wasn't even funny. I couldn't understand why he beat me.

I'm a real dumb-dumb in real life. I'm just book smart. But definitely not street smart. The other day I lost my jacket in a cab. And I'll forget things every time I leave the house.

I've been too funny in my life to have to play a character who's... moderately funny.

There's a difference between delivering real funny and just silly funny.

I don't know now if I'm funny. I just keep talking and hope that I hit something that's funny.

There are no funny lawyers - only funny people who made a career mistake.

We just keep trying to beat every show with the funny stick until it's funny

Stupid people surround themselves with smart people. Smart people surround themselves with smart people who disagree with them.

Even before the advent of smart devices, we employed touchscreens for our games with Nintendo DS, and we also adopted accelerometers for our Wii Remotes faster than smart devices did.

I wish I could calculate my way to a bigger audience, but I don't think I'm smart enough. Actually, I don't think anyone is smart enough. Most calculations along those lines fail.

If something's awful, I find it funny. If something's funny, I find it funny. It's my natural, go-to place.

In every show that you see, there's some stuff that's funny and some stuff that is not, or there might be stuff that you find funny and I don't. That would be true for any show, however funny or popular.

I grew up with an extremely funny dad, and my mom is super funny.

If you are truly offended by an 80-year-old man saying you're not funny, then you're probably not funny.

I love being funny! I started in the theater when I was 9 and, believe it or not, always played the funny part!

It's not hard for me to be funny. But it's really hard. I don't think a lot of people are funny. I meet a lot of people, and most of them aren't funny.

One time, Bert and I were making out for so long it wasn't even funny..But then it was funny.

I used to stutter really badly. Everybody thinks it's funny. And it's not funny. It's not.

The decision as to what's funny and what is not funny shall rest solely with Mr. Freberg.

I like to be friends with funny guys, but I don't want to date a funny guy.

I was always good at being observationally funny - like, contributing something funny to the conversation.

Sometimes along the way in my life I don't want a smart woman right now, I want a dumb woman. But then you think, that doesn't work, now I want a smart woman. Then you get a smart woman and you go no, that doesn't work so it's just killing me right now.

I know a smart business decision when I see one - choosing open standards is | a very smart business decision indeed.

The Side Effects of Dying in Your Pants isn't really funny… Alright, it's a little funny.

Being me is funny. I've made this weird character, and I think it's really funny.

In reality, as a comedian, you're successful because you're funny, and you should be able to be funny about anything.