Top 1200 Toilet Seat Quotes & Sayings - Page 5

It was a weird sensation. Like getting caught eavesdropping, or lying, or sitting on the toilet and having the bathroom walls suddenly drop away.

If I tell you my character has grey hair, you will not see her. If I tell you she has a tiny scar at the upper left corner of her lip from which protrudes one grey whisker—you will make up the rest of her face with absolute clarity. If I tell you my character is waiting in a car, you won’t be ‘caught,’ but if I tell you he pushes his fingers down in the crack of the car seat where the ancient leather has pulled away from the seat frame, and pulls up a small coin purse with a faded note in it—you will be mine.

The miracle of modern science. The LEP pours millions into your department, Foaly, and all you can do is send Mud Boys to the toilet.

My Twitter is a joke toilet, and I filter all these old, cringe-y parts of my brother and my childhood through that in an attempt to flush it down the drain forever.

You can draw a penguin on a toilet reading The New York Times and it's adorable, but try doing it with an adult male character, and it's disgusting.

The chili I ate made for an explosive bathroom experience. I don't know how to put this delicately, but I missed the toilet entirely.

I can wash utensils, chop vegetables and can fold beds. I don't think I can do anything beyond it. In fact, cleaning toilet pots is my biggest nightmare.

The main part of the house is a deep red and I have butterscotch carpet. And I have a bathroom with leopard skin floor, wallpaper and toilet.

Superman don't need no seat belt.

It is not the Head but the Heart that is the Seat of Atheism.

To wash one's hair, make one's toilet, and put on scented robes; even if not a soul sees one, these preparations still produce an inner pleasure.

Well, I've thought many times when my career was in the toilet, that I was going to have to seriously consider getting another job, I don't know what I'd do.

I hope to die in the saddle seat.

... he trotted down the hallway on all fours and started in on his second favorite pastime, conversations with plumbing. Just what I needed: Stone, the Toilet Whisperer.

I'm not running for anything but my own seat.

Martin Luther dreamed up Protestantism while sitting on the toilet at Wittenburg monastery, and we know what a big movement that became.

This body is the seat of all good and bad.

Which Seat Should I Take?

Our forests are not for toilet paper. They are worth more standing than cut. That deserves to be defended, not only by native peoples but also by environmentalists.

One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.

When I was about 7 years old, I built a leprechaun trap out of a cardboard box, a biscuit tin and some toilet paper tubes.

We are now in the 21st century: all books, including the Koran, should be fair game for flushing down the toilet without fear of violent reprisal.

When somebody follows you 20 blocks to the pharmacy, where they watch you buy toilet paper, you know your life has changed.

If you stay in a house and you go to the bathroom and there is no toilet paper, you can always slide down the banisters. Don't tell me you haven't done it.

When I find out a hotel doesn't have a DSL, it's like "What? There's no toilet?" Once you get used to high speed you ain't going back

When I visit schools and talk to students about writing, I give them one word of advice and I give it to them quickly and loudly-FINISH! Starting something is easier than finishing it. You must have discipline to go from a few sentences, to a few paragraphs, to a piece of writing that has a beginning, a middle, and an end. Finishing something bridges the difference between someone who has talent and one who does not. My best advice? Apply the seat of your pants to the seat of your chair-and finish. FINISH!

Essentially, we live in a patriarchy where women are being distracted from realizing their full potential by the amount of time they spend waiting in toilet queues.

Sexy, no alcoholic, but she drink like a toilet. Told her do me a favor and put your mouth on this faucet.

My mother always told me, 'I didn't make a perfume or go sell toilet paper. I did something good with my name.'

Right now I'm scoring goals and I'm the king of the world. And a couple weeks ago I was almost in the toilet. So maybe you just forget to flush me.

Undermine the entire economic structure of society by leaving the pay toilet door ajar so the next person can get in free.

I operate by the seat of my pants.

Have a seat, while I take to the sky.

I live by the seat of my pants.

If you don't have a seat at the table, you're on the menu.

I'm the king of napping. I can nap and I snore. Then I wake up, go to the toilet, wash my face, have a coffee and it's like a brand new day.

Even if my job for the day is cleaning the vents or fixing the toilet, it still feels good to be a part of the space program and advancing exploration.

And of course, when you see your brother in the toilet bowl...there's a little voice that say, 'I wonder where he would go...'...if it hadn't been for his head.

I'm definitely a seat-of-the-pants writer.

I was thinking about dying the other day the death thought came while I was sitting on the toilet peeing - that's where I have my most contemplative thoughts.

This is the man who called the fire department when the toilet backed up, and I'm asking him for help. What was I thinking? Why am I attracted to weak men?

Could I just use the loo?” I asked the nice officer. “No.” She closed the door in my face, As if I might rig an explosion in the toilet. Honestly.

Snap judgments? I'd gotten over those about the time I was toilet trained. Swore off diapers and faith in the human experience all in one week.

I'm horrible to live with. I don't clean. My clothes end up wherever I take them off. I forget to flush the toilet.

I could never plan to have a career that went this well... you know, there were times when it didn't: when it went into the toilet, or ducked, or was difficult to get moving.

I'm like toilet paper, toothpaste and certain amenities - I'm proven to be good. I've still got 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 years left.

He's sitting in the catbird seat.

I fly from the seat of my pants, basically.

A view of heaven from a seat in hell.

How can you put on a meaningful drama when every fifteen minutes proceedings are interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits with toilet paper?

Tenterhooks are the upholstery of the anxious seat.

The way that I play is, I'm in the driver's seat.

If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.

If you don't have a seat at the table, you're probably on the menu.

There will never Queen sit in my seat with more zeal to my country, care to my subjects and that will sooner with willingness venture her life for your good and safety than myself. For it is my desire to live nor reign no longer than my life and reign shall be for your good. And though you have had, and may have, many princes more mighty and wise sitting in this seat, yet you never had nor shall have, any that will be more careful and loving.

Spiritual methods are essential in Africa if you are going to survive politically. My cousin is the chief security officer for the president of Burkina Faso. He knows the key medicine man who works day and night to keep the president in power. These medicine men don't have offices downtown; they live in huts in remote areas, but that is where the real political power resides. A medicine man has no clue about the actual workings of domestic or international politics. All he knows is that a person has a seat of importance somewhere, and his job is to keep that person on that seat.

I married a man who isn't afraid to wash a dish, scrub a toilet, or have his unibrow waxed into submission by a licensed professional.

I took my son to an exhibition about inventing things, and he was so inspired he started collecting toilet rolls and empty bottles for his own 'inventions.'

Wichita Falls, Texas is considering using toilet water for drinking. And a dog there today said, 'White people's problems.'

Probably" is a word with an emergency ejector seat.