Top 34 Quotes & Sayings by Jason Jones

As long as Fox News continues to exist, you've got comedy.

People feel really uncomfortable when there's silence.

For news, I follow 'The New York Times,' 'The New Yorker,' and 'ProPublica.' For entertainment, I like The A.V. Club and The Onion.

Put your idol worship on firemen or a schoolteacher or a rescue worker or a first-aid worker or Doctors Without Borders. I love those guys. Those are your heroes.

Real life doesn't exist on a network television comedy. They just don't let you travel down any road that is presumably 'dark.'

I have a very short attention span, so books have never been my thing.

Fletcher Jones, is that not a quarterback's name? My kid is going to be a quarterback for the Hamilton Tiger Cats one day.

Kids are appendages on so many family sitcoms. They'll come in, they'll make half a joke, and then they're like, 'OK, gotta go to school,' or 'I'm going to my room.' And then you never see them again.

It's just not good to put stock in a Hollywood celebrity.

The Holiday Inn Express brand is known for great service, comfortable beds, all-you-can-eat ice from machines at every hotel, so I was pretty excited when they asked me to be a part of their Smart Thinking Platform.

Who doesn't want to be in the pictures?

I get 'The New Yorker,' and I'm usually about three issues behind. But I do catch up. The problem is that it always seems like homework, but then you start reading it and go, 'Why am I not doing this all the time? These are such great stories!' But, yeah, that stack gets so big and dense.

I only write about stuff that sort of happens to me, and then I blow it up into a much funnier version.

Every field piece I did on 'The Daily Show' was a story that lasted five to six minutes. We had a protagonist, we had an antagonist and often put them at odds. We knew the story we wanted to tell before we went in, and often it was about plugging whatever character you have - in this case, a real person - into said part.

It's one of my favourite types of comedy, just the awkward moments on camera. For many people, it's unbearable to watch, but I love seeing it when it's done right.

Network was just never the right fit with what I think is funny.

You can find comedy anywhere.

I've been very fortunate in my life.

Everything that I write about is a kernel of something that probably happened to me or one of my writers that I've co-opted and made it seem like it's mine.

I would rather be right than happy.

We don't infantilize our kids. If they ask us a question that's tough, we answer it honestly.

With comedic news, it's about having a point of view. If you don't have that, you don't have a show.

I don't really have any apps!

The suburbs have this veneer of happiness, you know? This veneer of the ideal life. From afar, it's all together - white picket fence, nice house - but you peel away one little layer, and it all comes crumbling down.

I'm actually just a terrible husband and a terrific exec producer. We just actually stay together for our careers. We look to the Clintons.

I can only speak for myself, but you never set out to be funny. You just set out to play the scenes real, and hopefully the funny comes.

With as much media as there is out there, there's always something that someone says that's stupid that you can make fun of.

People are forgetting how crazy President 43 was.

Even at its height, 'The Daily Show' would do one great show a week, one pretty good show a week, and then two 'meh' ones. It was filler.

I think that winning the battle in Hollywood is a necessary condition to winning the culture war.

I never went to church a day in my life. The dominant religion (influence) in my family was my grandfather who was a Scientologist.

So often times we see these films that erode human dignity...films that deny the transcendent moral order of the moral universe. They're always eroding natural affections for families. Fathers betray their commitments, children's are always portrayed as brats and disobedient, marriages are always in crisis and struggle. I think (for) most of us, that's not the lives we live. We're always being challenged, we always have challenges but we love our families, we love our spouse, we love our children.

Justice is blind until she gets the person that blinded her. Then it's payback time.

I look for three things. Number One is does the film promote the beauty and dignity of the human person? Number Two is does this film promote the transcendent moral order? And three, does it promote natural affection?