A Quote by Christopher Guest
Some instinct has told me I need to live in a world that isn't consumed with reading about myself or anyone else or someone's opinion about something. I need to be clear of that. It's just healthier for me. I feel happier.
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How do I think of you? As someone I want to be with. As someone as young as me, but "older," if that makes sense. As someone I like to look at, not just because you're good to look at, but because just looking at you makes me smile and feel happier. As someone who knows her mind and who I envy for that. As someone who is strong in herself without seeming to need anyone else to help her. As someone who makes me thinks and unsettles me in a way that makes me feel more alive.
It's been very jarring for me to stand in public and read about myself and my daughter and her father. I feel like I'm reading someone else's story, and I feel like I've lost something, too, in the writing of self, as if I'm standing and reading myself, as a stranger, to other strangers.
I'm worried about myself, not anybody else. I have my goals and I'm not worried about anyone. I need to take care of myself before I worry about someone else.
And there is something great about knowing that my only job is to be as happy as I can be about my life, and feel as good as I can about myself, and to lead as full and eventful a life as I can, so that it doesn’t ever feel like I’m just waiting around for some guy to ask me out. And most importantly, it’s good for us all to remember that we don’t need to scheme and plot and beg to get someone to ask us out. We’re fantastic.
I understood at once, I am not living, but actively dying. I am smoking, living unhealthily. I’m shutting down. I need to go the other way, inside. And it was so clear to me what I was doing. It was suddenly perfectly clear. I understood, I need to write. Live here, in my words, and my head. I need to go inside, that’s all. No big, complicated, difficult thing. I just need to go in reverse. And not worry about what to write about, but just write. Or, if I’m going to worry about what to write, then do this worrying on paper, so at least I’m writing and will have a record of the anxiety.
Reading is everything. Reading makes me feel like I've accomplished something, learned something, become a better person. Reading makes me smarter. Reading gives me something to talk about later on. Reading is the unbelievably healthy way my attention deficit disorder medicates itself. Reading is escape, and the opposite of escape; it's a way to make contact with reality after a day of making things up, and it's a way of making contact with someone else's imagination after a day that's all too real. Reading is grist. Reading is bliss.
I grew up in Harlem Grant projects, and I didn't have a whole lot then. I've always been good about only getting what I need, not what I want. Just because someone else has something, I don't feel the need to.
I don't speak out of place, but if you ask me, I will definitely speak the truth. Also, my opinion is my opinion. I don't feel the need to force anybody to agree or disagree with me. But if you ask me, I do feel it's important to speak with confidence about my feelings about whatever the questions are.
Everything that I think that I need to do, is all in order to propel me to some place, that when I get there I think I will be happier. So, everything that I am doing, no matter what it is, all of my lists of rights and wrongs, are all about me getting to a manifestation, that I believe I will then be happier... So why don't I just take the short cut and just be happy?
I am who I am. I'm not living for anyone else, I'm doing things for me. Regardless of what I do, someone's going to have an opinion about something. And that goes for... no matter who you are.
I never, nor will I, put another person down to feel better about myself. I will live and die by what I do, not what anyone else thinks about me.
I'm apologetic when I feel like I've made a mistake. And when I have done a disservice to myself or someone else. But I don't feel a need to apologize for doing or saying something that I think needs to be said, just because it may not sit comfortably with somebody else.
Career-wise, there are so many things where you don't get what you think you want. I've had to make space for, 'Do I let that debilitate me and make me feel bad about myself? And make me feel like I need to change myself in some way?' Because I think changing myself is very different from growing and learning.
I grew up in New York and I've always lived here, so I look at myself as a regular person. When somebody recognizes me from the film - and it can be a wide range of people, which shows the power of film - I feel like they're talking about someone else we both know. I just find it hard to believe that anyone would stop me to share how much they loved something that I was a part of.
I actually dislike, more than many people, working through literary allusion. I just feel that there's something a bit snobbish or elitist about that. I don't like it as a reader, when I'm reading something. It's not just the elitism of it; it jolts me out of the mode in which I'm reading. I've immersed myself in the world and then when the light goes on I'm supposed to be making some kind of literary comparison to another text. I find I'm pulled out of my kind of fictional world, I'm asked to use my brain in a different kind of way. I don't like that.
I've gone places where they've told me what I need to do, what I need to say, who I need to be, what moves I need to perform. And at Impact I get to just be me. I have creative control to be me and do what I want.
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